Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

Posted by DRMom

I WAH. I take my kids to preschool every day. M-Th my SIL picks them up and watches them at her house. Fridays I have a nanny that comes after school. I can be there for them and still have my own career. I would look into something like this...I've been a SAHM when I was laid off when they were about 1 year old. I am very happy with the situation we have now Good Luck!

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

Posted by Journey33

Posted by DRMom

I WAH. I take my kids to preschool every day. M-Th my SIL picks them up and watches them at her house. Fridays I have a nanny that comes after school. I can be there for them and still have my own career. I would look into something like this...I've been a SAHM when I was laid off when they were about 1 year old. I am very happy with the situation we have now Good Luck!

If you dont mind me asking, what kind of WAH do u do? seems like the best of both worlds!

If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I think the best sahms are the ones who enjoyed working and found career success. It is in your personality.
For the past 6 years I have been around sahms. A lot of teachers, some nurses, lawyers, exec assistants, pediatrician...everyone really happy with their choice to sah. It is funny, it is all about building a network. You have to be a self starter-have a plan the night before about what you are going to wake up and do with your kids.
I wish I knew how many miles i have walked with my kids-it is my favorite time of the day.
I enjoy cooking their meals. i took them everywhere.
Now that my older one is in K-I see how important volunteers are at the school. I have no idea why so many look down on sahms of school aged kids-there is definitely a need for them.
There are tons of things going on at school during the day. Award ceremonies, parties, little parades...I am not going to miss this.
On mondays, my 2 year old and I go and eat lunch with his class. She loves it, my son loves it-his class is so happy to see us.
Then there are afterschool sports. I was offered a teacher's assistant spot at his school-but I still have my 2 year old at home-I could see myself doing something like that in the future...but really, then I would not be able to volunteer and go along on their field trips.
I live at the beach with my kids all summer long. I love my life and their's. good luck with your decision!

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I (and anyone who knew me before kids) would have never thought for second that I would be a SAHM. The second those boys popped out, it was never even a second thought. I never struggled with the decision. It was a pull/force/instinct, I don't know what to call it, but I knew THIS is what I was suppose to do. I don't think that would have changed if I was a brain surgeon or janitor.

I have never regretted my decision, even on my hardest days. BUT I do not think it is for everyone, I have seen both sides

GL

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I feel like as moms we can't win.

I was home with DS last year but needed to go back bc I was going to lose my position and is hard to get and I didn't want to give it up. If I could afford to leave it forever and not go back I would have, but bc I need it for the future I went back. I am lucky bc I work in education and very close to home so I am home by 3:10 everyday and DS is watched by family, still I wish I was with him, if we were rich I would have no qualms quitting forever and being a mommy.

If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I had no intention of becoming a SAHM. I was very happy with my position, loved my coworkers/company. The decision was made for me as my company went out of business when I was 8 months pregnant with DS.
Once DS was born, though, I knew there was no way I could go back to work and leave him with someone else. DS is now 3 and I also have a 11 month old DD and I love it. Not every day, mind you. Some days I daydream about being back at work, getting to eat lunch and go to the bathroom in peace. But overall, being a SAHM has been so incredibly rewarding. Like PP have said, getting to witness their first steps, first words, molding the people they will become....it's really amazing.

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

So happy to see this post. So many SAHM's are not very highly educated (I don't mean not educated, I mean most don't have a doctorate) so I feel like it might be easier if you are leaving a "job" instead of a "career." I finished law school and took the bar, and immediately got pregnant after. I always thought I'd want to work half-time and be home half-time. But once I started thinking about leaving DD with someone else (family was never a regular babysitting option for me, although they do help often), I couldn't bare the thought of leaving her. I went on a couple interviews and decided that my education would always be there, but my DD's years wouldn't be. So, I stay home, take small cases, and tutor law students. No daycare expenses b/c I tutor at night when DH is home or daytime when my mom can watch DD, and take cases that I can handle when DD sleeps.

Do I regret this decision? NOT IN A MILLION YEARS! So many of my peers are miserable in their jobs. While my full-time job is stressful, tiring, and never ends (my hubby gets a break, but I rarely do... after all, I am mommy), it is soooo worth any sacrifice. I plan to stay home ft until DD and any later children are in school full-time, and then will consider part-time work (if I have not already built a decent business/reputation on my own by then). Will it be hard to get into the workforce after so many years home? Absolutely. But I can't worry about that when I look at DD's face and, when she's sick, all she wants is mommy's arms. I love that little girl so much!

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

As you may have gotten, I'd suggest seeing if you can make your career into a part-time job/career. That way, you don't completely lose yourself, but still get to be the SAHM that you want to be. That's what I'm doing and looooove it!

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I shouldn't have come in also.

I have mixed feelings about working too.
I do work about 45 to 50 hrs a week.

It's a great job. Not just a job, a profession. I could not just stop and go back. I may be a non hire if I took too much time off. We also get our benefits through my job. I always say it would be ideal for me to take 5 years off... But I can't. Part time also not a possibility.

I see it as an investment into their future. We have money, they see hard working family, and I'll have a job and connections for their future.

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I took off 7months after DS #1 was born, then went back to work full time. I work overnights and those hours are really hard. You are always tired, and it takes a toll on your body. I never felt like I was around enough for DS #1. I was very lucky to have family watching him, but I was miserable. I took off again for 6 months when I had DS #2. I just couldn't imagine going back full time after my second child, but we couldn't afford me not working at all. So I work two overnights a week for now. I really think it is the best of both worlds. I like having adult interaction at work. It is a break from my usual routine and I'm bringing money in. At the same time, I have plenty of time with my children and I'm able to do things with them, I couldn't do it I was full time.
If there is a way for you to work part time, I think it is the way to go. But I think it is very important to be home with your children if you can swing it.

If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I am in a similar but sort of opposite situation.

I loved my job and never thought I'd be a SAHM for financial reasons. You've prob heard my story 20 times on here but I lost my job when DD was born cause I wasn't medically cleared to go back to work and my job wouldn't hold my position, no FMLA cause it was a small company under 50 employees. I ended up a SAHM and loved it. I continued to look for work but I really truly loved being a SAHM.

However we added a ton of debt during my time on unemployment. As luck would have it - I was contacted by a company in my field recently and ultimately got the job. Next Monday, after 20 months as a SAHM, I go back to work full time. I am absolutely beside myself about it. I am excited for the job - in my career there are few jobs available for my exact skill set and experience - and this one happens to be perfect. But my excitement doesn't hold a candle to my amount of sadness. I don't even mind the idea of daycare now that she is older, I just will miss hanging out with her every day SO much. I honestly have been a wreck ever since I signed the offer letter.

I say if you can financially swing it - STAY HOME. When you go back to work ultimately you may have to work hard to get back to where you are in your career, but in the end the industry will still be there. Your babies will only be babies once.

Re: If you were a career mom turned SAHM, please come in!

I wanted desperately to stay home when DS#1 was born. He had some heart issues and I felt terrible going back to work. I was the breadwinner and HAD to go back.

When DS#2 was born, we decided as a family that I would stay home indefinitely. I lasted about a year. I was miserable as a SAHM. I felt everyday was a battle to get DS#1 to nap. I HATE housework. Being home all day was not for me. Time with my kids was not all quality time. Instead i felt like it was daily survival until DH came home from work. House was a mess. Some people love being home. It isn't for everyone.

I now work part time and it is truly the best of both worlds. I outsource almost all housework. All my time home is family time. I can still do lots of playdates, attend all school functions and can volunteer for any events at school. I would highly recommend it if you have the opportunity. Both our sons attend a fabulous preschool with a wonderful curriculum, teachers and facilities. I could not be happier with the school. I no longer have any guilt about working part time. Plus DH gets out of work early and picks up the boys everyday at 3.

Message edited 1/7/2013 10:32:37 AM.