How do you tell someone that you know won't care

My father and I were never close. He basically hates kids. My other two pregnancies my mother told him, so I was saved from telling him but it looks like this time around its on me. I am just telling him for the sake of him hearing it from me and not someone else.

When I told him I got engaged, he didn't say anything! DH and I eloped, and we basically just told him if he wanted to he could meet us, but never said congrats or anything.

I know he's going to say something dumb, or make a face and its just not something I want to deal with. I also know if I don't tell him it will be an issue. Any advice?

How do you tell someone that you know won't care

If you really think that is how he will react what about a pleasant email. Like how are things with you. Haven't seen you awhile. Would be nice to get together soon.dh and I have some exciting news....we're expecting again and are very excited. Hope you are too! Anyway let me know if you want to get lunch or dinner soon. This way you don't have to deal with immediate reactions or gestures that can be hurtful.

How do you tell someone that you know won't care

I wouldnt tell them if i thought they wouldnt care

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

obviously every situation is different but i have a father who i am not close to either and amongst other feelings he may have had toward my pregnancy, not caring is kind of one of them as well...

to be honest, just in my personal situation, there is no ideal way to tell him. just come out with it..unfortunately it seems like you know already that nothing you could said will make him care or have a kind response. so just go in knowing that and try to let his reaction roll off of you the best you can. im sorry you have to deal with this, its so hard, i know!!

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

How do you tell someone that you know won't care

i agree with pp...send an email and save yourself the face to face or akward over the phone conversation

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

If I didn't think they would care then I wouldn't tell them.

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

How do you tell someone that you know won't care

I know it is difficult bc this is your father but if he isn't going to be excited for you then I would just shoot him an email or not tell him at all.

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

I didn't. I emailed them, and it was entirely up to them when/if they responded.

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

The problem is I do see him, not a lot but enough, and I know if he hears it through the grapevine, it's going to be so much worse. Sometimes, I just don't care, but other times I am like that little girl, looking for some sort of approval from her daddy.

I am going to mention it when I see him, it just sucks that I am stressing about it because I don't even know how to do it without seeming like I am doing something wrong, does that make sense?

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

How do you tell someone that you know won't care

If it would be worse if he heard through the grapevine than i would assume that he does care.

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

I think he just wants to hear it from the source and not be left out.

This is the guy who returned every single gift we ever bought him, or asked us why we bought him this sh*t.

He never has a nice thing to say, it's his way or the highway, and maybe it's because he doesn't know how to speak to people, or whatever it is, but it's frustrating. I try talking to him, but it's wasted.

I am starting to get over it, I realize we will never have that sort of relationship, it's just hard.

Re: How do you tell someone that you know won't care

We are sort of in a similar situation. It isnt that I think they dont care, they do in their wierd way, they just make no effort with keeping up to date esp being in a different state.

I think this time Im going to just send an email. We never really talk via phone so i always feel strange when we do.