If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

DH and I were talking about this last cycle.
and I'm curious how others feel.

I'm not sure I can even handle going on hormones to boost ovulation! I am so sensitive to everything. I even get sleepy from 2 tylenol. I feel like being on medication that will change my hormones will be too much for me to handle. ( I went off of BCP almost 3 years ago bc it started to really affect my health)

Then there's the mental aspect of it. It doesn't always happen right away. As of right now we've only been ttc for 6 months and it turns my world upside down every time I get a bfn. My life revolves around whether we should bd or not... even with stopping temping, and charting - it's still driving me insane.

As much as I want a baby (and we are planning on just 1) I'm not sure if I'll be able (Physically & Mentally) to handle the medication, procedures, and endless Dr. visits if it doesn't happen naturally.

DH is on board with whatever I need.

Do you know what you will do? r what you think you can handle? and also if you thought you couldn't deal with all of it and are now actually going through it - is it as scary as you thought?

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

I think if it doesn't happen naturally; I'd take the next step of clomid; IUI; hopefully that would do it. If not we'd go for IVF. I'm not going to lie-i think about the costs of all those things. Right now I say we'd do all that we can. I believe insurance covers most meds & procedures. I guess I can really on say if that time comes.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

We are willing to go thru IVF to have a child...I am lucky enough to have insurance coverage for IVF so if we need to do that we will...We want to have a child badly so I am willing to put myself thru pretty much anything & everything to get to that goal...we have already done 3 IUI's...I knew for me it wouldnt be an easy road to get pg since I have PCOS but I thought with some meds that would be what we needed but sometimes everything can be 100% textbook perfect and it still wont work...even IVF is not guaranteed...if we do exhaust the IVF route we will def pursue adoption...I hope that we will ultimately be able to have biological children but if that doesnt happen we will be parents one way or another...That is the path right now but I find that its ever changing and our journey right now may change... You have to do what is comfy for you and your DH...its def a team effort and you have to look at all your options and what works best for you both.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

I *think* I would do anything but DH is against even the slightest intervention such as clomid so I'm hoping it happens naturally but we have 1 perfect DC so if it doesn't I will learn to accept that.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

having been through IVF, i have to say, there is no point in really discussing this when you aren't going through it. when you go through it your views change and what you would and wouldn't do will change. discussing it when it's not your reality will just have you talking idealistically. when push comes to shove what you will do for a baby radically changes when it becomes your best/only option.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

I will do whatever I need to do, even IVF. My mom did it and it never took, 25 years ago. I would absolutely do it now.

And if that didn't work I would absolutely adopt.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

thanks for your honest answers.



to all

Message edited 3/6/2012 6:37:18 PM.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

i am in the middle of a ivf cycle right now so there is my answer

i think flowerwife hit it right on the head..

until you are there u wont know until you are faced with the decision...nobody want to go through it..these past 2 years have been the hardest thing i have ever gone through


but we want a baby and we will not give up

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

i can honestly say i dont really know. i am pretty certain i would go on medications if necessary but further than that, again, I really wont know unless the situation presented itself. I am inclined to think that I wouldn't do more than any medications (for a laundry list of personal reasons) but who knows...

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

My DS is my world and I would do anything to have another baby. That being said I am taking things one step at a time, I can't think of what if's or I will drive myself (even more ) nuts.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

I was on clomid when i conceived, the next cycle would have been IUI. I was prepared and actually expecting it. I have thought about up through IVF, I'd be absolutely willing if necessary. Surrogacy or a sperm donor, im not so sure about but i can see what the other ladies are saying about not really knowing unless youre faced with it.
i am ocd and a planner myself so i can understand where youre coming from. Hopefully if you do need intervention, it may only be clomid or an IUI - the least invasive. You might just need that extra push.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

i made it a point to talk about this to dh when we were trying "naturally" and again when i started seeing the re. i felt he deserved to know that clomid and iui was as far as i was willing to go and that i had no interest in putting us through ivf. for me physically and for us financailly. it also allowed him to express his feelings and fears. im glad we did.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

to be 100% honest, at this point, with one "naturally" conceived healthy and happy DD, if it didn't happen "naturally" the second go-round, we would probably stop and count the blessings we are fortunate enough to have.

my DH is against any medical intervention to have a child. i honestly don't think that his mind would change if we were unable to naturally conceive a second child.

aside from that I have seen firsthand what women endure going through IVF (my sister did it many, many times). i applaud them. and i readily admit that I don't think i could handle it myself. i might feel differently if I didn't already have DD. heck, I might feel differently if the time comes to TTC#2 and it's not working. but as of right now, I would stop at 1.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

i am willing to go through IVF... i did one IUI. Currently we are back to natural as in sex, but im taking all sorts of meds... We just got notification that Shauns insurance is active so we are waiting to see what his coverage is like before we make a decision to try this way again or move onto IVF.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

I conceived DS naturally but I would go as far as I needed to have a child.

I agree with what the other ladies said that until you are in it you can not know for sure but I am fairly certain that I will try everything and anything I could to become a mom, whether it be IVF, adoption or surrogacy.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

After reading everyones responses I'm hoping I'm not coming off as saying "I just don't want to try anything other then BD"

I read a few times "if you want a baby bad enough" etc etc. For me, it's not about bad enough (Don't want to get into my whole background) it's about fear of the unknown. Wondering if I can handle it physically and mentally.

I'm scared I won't be able to and I'll lose the chance of ever becoming a mother (at least a biological mother)

I'm pretty freaked out about it all right now.

Between my thyroid, kidneys, all around health - I really don't know what's gonna happen. I hoped so hard it would happen before I would be faced with these decisions.

I know it's a sensitive subject for everyone.

here's to CD1

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Posted by PhyllisNJoe

After reading everyones responses I'm hoping I'm not coming off as saying "I just don't want to try anything other then BD"

I read a few times "if you want a baby bad enough" etc etc. For me, it's not about bad enough (Don't want to get into my whole background) it's about fear of the unknown. Wondering if I can handle it physically and mentally.

I'm scared I won't be able to and I'll lose the chance of ever becoming a mother (at least a biological mother)

I'm pretty freaked out about it all right now.

Between my thyroid, kidneys, all around health - I really don't know what's gonna happen. I hoped so hard it would happen before I would be faced with these decisions.

I know it's a sensitive subject for everyone.

here's to CD1

Message edited 3/9/2012 9:03:32 PM.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Not very far at all.

I would do IUI, maybe. But NOT IVF.

I hve no desire to my body through that, nor my marraige.

Plus I am not dying to have a child. I would LOVE to, but its not so important to me DH.

I see what all the women go through in IF board and think they have a great deal of courage. I see what they go throough and pray for them all the time.

But I personally have zero desire to go through all that.

I think you hot nail onthe head with "if you want it badly enough". I dont. And we also refuse to go into debt for IVF etc. We dont want to bring a child into the world owing $15,000. But thats US.

Message edited 3/9/2012 10:02:55 PM.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?

Posted by Saphire01

Posted by PhyllisNJoe

After reading everyones responses I'm hoping I'm not coming off as saying "I just don't want to try anything other then BD"

I read a few times "if you want a baby bad enough" etc etc. For me, it's not about bad enough (Don't want to get into my whole background) it's about fear of the unknown. Wondering if I can handle it physically and mentally.

I'm scared I won't be able to and I'll lose the chance of ever becoming a mother (at least a biological mother)

I'm pretty freaked out about it all right now.

Between my thyroid, kidneys, all around health - I really don't know what's gonna happen. I hoped so hard it would happen before I would be faced with these decisions.

I know it's a sensitive subject for everyone.

here's to CD1

Honestly, I totally understand what you are saying. I think what the ladies are saying regarding "if you want a baby bad enough" is that you do not know what route you will choose until a doctor (or a few doctors) straight up tell you, "you will never get pregnant naturally, ever." Once a doctor says that your only chance is with IVF, then you start thinking differently. I know without a doubt that I will never get pregnant without IVF because of male factor. It's a fact. I want a baby, so I'm doing IVF. I'm so nervous because I react badly to drugs too. All the women on the boards assured me, though, that it's not that bad. It's a strange thing with fertility, you always assume you are and then you take a few tests and it turns out you were wrong about your whole life. It's like thinking you are healthy and being diagnosed with a life altering disease all of a sudden. Good luck.

Also, just wanted to add. I can't take birth control pills either. I developed very scary panic disorder from bcp's, but guess what, they are part of IVF protocol, so I am doing it. You sound very scared and fearful of drugs. After developing panic disorder, I am too. But, I'll be taking them.

Re: If it doesn't happen "Naturally" how far will you go to have a baby?