A guilty admission...anyone else?

I feel so bad admitting this....

We will not be finding out the sex of the baby...

But I am secretively hoping for another girl!

I feel guilty admitting it! I would be so happy with a boy and to have one of each. And my father wanted us to have a boy so badly since we have only girls in our family.

But secretively I'd love a girl so that my daughter could grow up with a sister. I am so close to my sisters and not very close to my brother...and I'd love Emily to have that sisterly relationship that I value so much.


Is there anyone else who secretively has a preference over the sex of the baby?

Don't get me wrong. I would love to have a healthy boy. I'd love for DH to have the experience of having a son. And I think it would also be fun for Emily to have a little brother. But there is this inner part of me that would love two girls!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

It's our first child so I just really want a healthy, healthy baby BUTTTT

if I could choose, I'd want a baby boy first. I always, always wanted a baby girl and I still hope to BUT I'd really like to give her an older brother who will look out for her and protect her So I guess I'm already thinking of my future baby girl's well being

My dad, DH, and SIL all had dreams that I'm having a boy so I already started getting attached to the idea of a minnie version of DH

So if I could choose, I'd have a baby boy first than a baby girl.

Message edited 10/26/2011 9:35:25 AM.

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Not at all.. I don't have a sister, and I have always wondered what it would be like to have a sister to share everything in life with.. I have a little brother I love to pieces and we are tight as ever but of course he's a not a girl.. even though I asked my mom can we switch him when she first told me I had a brother

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

With my first pregnancy we were team green, but I wanted a girl. From the moment I peed on the stick, I thought it was a girl and wanted that. I was obsessed with cute baby girl stuff. My friends all had sweet beautiful baby girls I, of course, wanted a healthy baby above anything else. I then started dreaming about having a son and I just started feeling like it was a boy and I was happy about it. Turned out it was a boy and I cannot imagine not having my DS. He is truly a blessing and miracle and I feel lucky every single day to have him! I wouldn't change him for a daughter no matter what!

Now that I'm expecting again, I really thought I'd have the same strong desires for a daughter, but I'm happily surprised to not have any preference at all. I think my DS will be a wonderful big brother to a boy or girl sibling. And I love the idea of two brothers Of course I love the idea of one of each too. It just feels different now. Maybe because of what I went through to have my DS, I just truly value the healthy baby aspect more than anything and it blocks everything else for me.

Bottom line is that you can't control your feelings. I hate it when people become so judgmental about those that say they have a preference. Seriously, it doesn't mean you won't love your baby no matter what, it just means that your feelings have you wishing more for one than the other, but you'll be happy regardless. And if it is a boy for you, I'm SURE you will be beyond thrilled even if you're slightly disappointed at first. You will still love your baby no matter what!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

when i was pregnant with my second, I secretly wanted another girl for the same reason. (Well, I am an only child, but always wanted a sister.) They were going to be 13 months apart and I just thought it would be so cool to be sisters so close in age. I only told my mom. Baby 2 is a I love their relationship. DH secretly (or not so secretly) wanted a boy. he couldn't love our daughter more. I think it's natural to think about relationships and what you might want, but in the end, when you meet your baby, you know that boy or girl, this was the exact baby you were meant to have.

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Posted by LoveyQ

With my first pregnancy we were team green, but I wanted a girl. From the moment I peed on the stick, I thought it was a girl and wanted that. I was obsessed with cute baby girl stuff. My friends all had sweet beautiful baby girls I, of course, wanted a healthy baby above anything else. I then started dreaming about having a son and I just started feeling like it was a boy and I was happy about it. Turned out it was a boy and I cannot imagine not having my DS. He is truly a blessing and miracle and I feel lucky every single day to have him! I wouldn't change him for a daughter no matter what!

Now that I'm expecting again, I really thought I'd have the same strong desires for a daughter, but I'm happily surprised to not have any preference at all. I think my DS will be a wonderful big brother to a boy or girl sibling. And I love the idea of two brothers Of course I love the idea of one of each too. It just feels different now. Maybe because of what I went through to have my DS, I just truly value the healthy baby aspect more than anything and it blocks everything else for me.

Bottom line is that you can't control your feelings. I hate it when people become so judgmental about those that say they have a preference. Seriously, it doesn't mean you won't love your baby no matter what, it just means that your feelings have you wishing more for one than the other, but you'll be happy regardless. And if it is a boy for you, I'm SURE you will be beyond thrilled even if you're slightly disappointed at first. You will still love your baby no matter what!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Dont feel bad at all. I deeply wish I have a girl (this is our first child) and of course I would be happy with whatever God gives me as long as he/she is healthy. But a little girl would be nice

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Ever since I can remember I always wanted to have a little boy. Prior to my Level 2 when people would ask us what we wanted DH would say "A Healthy Baby" and I would say "Boy" (of course having a healthy baby is what I really wanted but let's be real people ask what sex do you want Once I hit 16 weeks everyone and I mean everyone thought I was having a little girl so I started getting really used to the idea that it might be a little Princess. I started looking at all the pink and cute stuff bc I didn't want to be "disappointed" if they told us it was a girl. When we went for our Level 2 the sono tech asked if this was our first and then said "Oh man you guys are sooo lucky that's what I wanted" and told us we were having a little boy. Ecstatic does not even begin to describe how I felt BUT to be honest I would have been just as happy with a girl. Besides my Mom and MIL both wanted little girls so they are already asking for a second

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Guilty here too! We are finding out the sex and I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a boy. DH has two girls from previous relationships, and we would LOVE a boy.

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

I wanted/knew I was having a boy the first time around and the same thing this second time. DS will be 19mo when this baby is born and I really wanted a boy so he would have a little brother close in age to grow up with.
We def want 3 though and I am starting to realize that I really want a girl the next time around. I want to be the mother of the bride someday!
Plus we are having such a hard time deciding on a name for this boy that I don't think I could do it again!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

No need to feel guilty. With my first baby I just knew it was going to be a boy. Well she wasnt I had to get used to the fact i was indeed having a baby . Now that shes here me and dh are utterly in love and couldnt imagine life with out her. Now that im having a boy im was secretly wishing it was a girl now i cant get used to saying Im having a son Im a mess LOL Either way i feel blessed to be having a healthy baby and cant wait for my dd to have a sibling

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Guilty here too. We are Team with our 1st and I am sorta hoping for one sex over the other. Of course I just want a healthy baby..but I can't help swaying a little toward one gender

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Posted by NikkiMoon

I really want a girl the next time around. I want to be the mother of the bride someday!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Not pregnant yet, but I hope someday to have a girl. DH is so convinced that we will only have boys that it makes me a lil sad.

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

I can totally relate. With my first of course all I wanted was a healthy baby and my DH felt the same way but has always felt the pressure to have a boy and "carry on the family name" he is on the only boy of 4 children. My DH is absolutely surrounded by women - 3 sisters 9 nieces etc. I told my mother right before my 20 week sono that I secretly wanted a ballerina Well luckily enough we got her!! This time around I am so torn!! I would love to have a boy so my DH would get the boy he's always wanted (although now he says that DD proved him wrong and girls are amazing - talk about a daddy's girl ) and then the other part of me would love for DD to have a sister. I had two older brothers growing up and always longed for a sister. I find out soon though!!!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

I understand having wanting to have the same sex. I think there is something to be said about the bond they have. But, that being said, I know SO many people who are close to their sibling of the opposite sex.

I'm pretty sure I'll be a boy mommy (I have two boys now and I'm sure I'll have a third someday) and I'm really happy about that. I of course want to experience being a girl mommy but I live for my boys that if I can have another gorgeous, healthy, happy boy that would just make me so happy.

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Here's my confession: I wanted a girl a little bit more than I wanted a boy.
I lost my grandmother on New Years Eve and there has been an abundance of boys this generation so I wanted a little girl to name after my grandma.
Also, girl shopping is so much more fun than boy clothing etc.

I am very happy to be getting my boy first tho! Cant wait to meet him. Next time around I will be trying for my little girl

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

I feel the same way, don't feel bad. I think it's perfectly natural to feel this way.
I found out yesterday we are having another boy. Not going to lie, I was sad. I have always wanted a girl. Actually I wanted two girls like you. I grew up with a sister and all my cousins except one are girls. I knew nothing about boys. I'm feeling guilty I feel this way, and at the same I'm still upset. Well I always said before having kids that I would rather two boys or two girls over one of each. I know it will be wonderful for DS to have a brother.
So again don't feel guilty!! It's normal.

For me I just told DH where going to have a third. DH is not crazy about that idea. Lol

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

When I was pg with DD1- I was convinced I was having a boy (so was most everyone else!) I was team green and was shocked that she was a girl!

I always wanted the boy first, then a girl- but having my DD has been so much fun!!!!

I will admit that I was a bit disappointed to find out I am having another girl. Mostly because DH wants to stop at 2 and I would love to have the experience of raising both.

That being said- my sister and I have a great relationship and I would love the same for my daughters. Plus, I have so many clothing items that DD either never wore or barely got to wear. . .

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

Posted by LoveyQ

With my first pregnancy we were team green, but I wanted a girl. From the moment I peed on the stick, I thought it was a girl and wanted that. I was obsessed with cute baby girl stuff. My friends all had sweet beautiful baby girls I, of course, wanted a healthy baby above anything else. I then started dreaming about having a son and I just started feeling like it was a boy and I was happy about it. Turned out it was a boy and I cannot imagine not having my DS. He is truly a blessing and miracle and I feel lucky every single day to have him! I wouldn't change him for a daughter no matter what!

Now that I'm expecting again, I really thought I'd have the same strong desires for a daughter, but I'm happily surprised to not have any preference at all. I think my DS will be a wonderful big brother to a boy or girl sibling. And I love the idea of two brothers Of course I love the idea of one of each too. It just feels different now. Maybe because of what I went through to have my DS, I just truly value the healthy baby aspect more than anything and it blocks everything else for me.

Bottom line is that you can't control your feelings. I hate it when people become so judgmental about those that say they have a preference. Seriously, it doesn't mean you won't love your baby no matter what, it just means that your feelings have you wishing more for one than the other, but you'll be happy regardless. And if it is a boy for you, I'm SURE you will be beyond thrilled even if you're slightly disappointed at first. You will still love your baby no matter what!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

me too... i really hope its a girl. and i secretly hope to have two girls because i love having a sister and would want that for my kids as well. totally feel you!

Re: A guilty admission...anyone else?

I think its very natural to feel that way With my first I didnt really care, with my second, I was torn-I really wanted a brother for my son, but really wanted a little girl too. Looking back, I think I really was hoping for a girl slightly more (also b/c we are most likely not having a 3rd I had figured that would be the last chance). When they told us girl at our level II, Me and my DH had tears in our eyes (he wanted a boy the 1st time and a girl the 2nd time-so he was super happy LOL). I can honestly say though if it had been a boy I would have been just as happy as my DS is such a momma's boy and my little buddy

ETA-if we had had a girl first, I would have wanted a boy next. I have a sister and a brother and me and my sister have never been close but me and brother are super close.

Message edited 10/26/2011 8:35:43 PM.