This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

my DS and my niece are 4 mos apart. DS is 4 mos younger than my niece.

SIL's pregnancy wasn't quite planned, but ours was (we were aiming for a honeymoon baby, it was 1 month later we conceived)

SIL and I often talked about when we'd have our 2nd ones, not so much for coordinating the pregnancies, but b/c we've both had ppl ask when we're going to have more.

My selfish issue is I want to be pregnant by myself and have this baby by myself. I don't want to have to share the spotlight again.

It's bad enough that I'm 36 (37 in Dec) and she just turned 30. We've been TTCing since January, with no luck and 1 m/c.

Tonight I saw a HPT in her bathroom (I was getting a roll of TP and saw the empty box) no idea what the results were b/c she was complaining of having cramps & her period.

Also, my BIL (not her wife) made a comment that added MORE to my being upset. When SIL was complaining of not feeling good he said "I thought you guys were waiting til January to start trying"

It upsets me for a number of reasons. Too many (and many embarassing) to list.




Having a pity party . . . even though I have so many other things to focus my energy on . . . I just can't seem to.

Re: This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

Re: This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

Thanks Andrea!!

Re: This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

Im sorry, and i don't think its "selfish", i can completely understand where ur coming from

Re: This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

I went through the same thing with being pregnant 3 months after my SIL and it kinda sucked! It was our 1st and her 1st, and needless to say, she got all the attention. (my family doesn't live on LI) so it was extremely frustrating to see everyone gush over her baby bump and not mine ( mine was smaller) and worst thing was, we were team green and told everyone our baby names for boy and girl..well, she took our boy name and used it as the middle name for her son (she found out the gender) and when DH and I got mad at her for taking our name, she replied "well you don't even know if you're having a boy so it doesn't matter!" My MIL is pushing my SIL to have another baby, and doesn't want me to have another just yet because my son still doesn't sleep through the night, and it bothers her because? Im a SAHM and my SIL works full time and has MIL watch her son...so im really not understanding why she doesn't want me to have another baby.. anyways, we always plan when we want to try for another DC, and it would be nice to be pregnant w/o SIL preggo. So I know what you're going through.

Re: This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

I have been talking about getting pregnant with SIL. Not b/c we are planning it this way, it's just that both of our DH's are ready to have children. I would hope that our IL's wont make either of us feel like one is more important than the other. I feel for you ladies and don't think it is selfish. It's a very frutrating process that I never thought would be this way!
Good Luck!!!

Re: This may sound a bit selfish but . . .

i have been there...but now i am at the point i will get pregnant with anyone and everyone if it means i am pregnant

you are not selfish,you are human! dont beat yourself up