What would you do?

Is it ok for newborns to be around toddlers? My SIL is visiting NY with my niece who is 3, when the baby is just a few days old. I am happy they are coming to share this time with us, but my niece is pretty wild right now at 3yo lol and SIL is pretty hands off. I am getting a little nervous about her being around the baby, esp. since I am having a cs and cant really be running after her.

I feel bad bc my niece is so excited about her baby cousin and I am sure shes going to want to be all over him, but ive read on here that some girls try to keeo the newborn away from toddlers for a few weeks until the baby has his vaccinations.

so what would you do? She is still going to come visit but does any1 have advice of something I can do or nicely say to my SIL ??

Re: What would you do?

I would just make sure that your niece, or anyone for that matter, washes their hands really really well and that someone always supersvise her when she wants to hold the baby or see her. I would just wait until they are there before saying anything and then just be casual like.. "make sure you wash your hands before you touch the baby!" And of course if your niece has any signs of a cold etc, I would then nicely ask her to stay clear! lol

Re: What would you do?

Honestly-the keeping the baby in a bubble thing really only works for your first kid.

Once you have more than one, you have no choice but to have the baby around toddlers/other kids.

So, I think instead of isolating the baby, just make sure everyone practices good hygiene. Maybe let your niece see the baby and then kind of keep her at bay.

DD was all over DS when we brought him home from the hospital, and, she is in daycare so there was the potential for lots of germs. We just made DD wash her hands a lot. He survived.

Re: What would you do?

Re: What would you do?

I didn't let kids hold the baby as a newborn. We just told all the Mom's that we didnt want the kids holding her and everyone was fine with that. I also held her a lot when I felt like the nieces and nephews were getting "too close".

I get that you cant put the baby in a bubble but you are also the parent and those are not your kids so you have every right to tell them no touching or holding - or whatever you are comfortable with. I'm pregnant with #2 now and we are still going to have those rules with the nieces and nephews.

Re: What would you do?

my dr just told me that their shots really don't take full effect until the child has had the boosters. so they get shots early on but that doesn't really prevent them from anything.

As for a toddler and a c-section... that's a lot the handle at once. If you don't feel comfortable saying something to your sister about being hands on while she is there, I would tell them to wait until the baby is at least 4 weeks old so that you know you are healed enough to shield your baby

Re: What would you do?

You need to tell your sister that if her kid is sick, she can't come. You also need to tell your sister (if the case arises) that her kid needs to chill or go home.

Re: What would you do?

I have tons of kids in my family and am worried about this too.

I plan to ask the parents (nicely) to not bring sick kids around them. and when kids are around the rules are wash hands, and no touching the face or hands. I really would like to keep all child/baby contact to a min. call me nuts, but my kids are going to be born around flu season, and if God forbid they catch something, they are too little to fight it off.

I KNOW this won't go over well with some people and they will have something to say

Re: What would you do?

this will be my third and no toddlers touching anything but feet in socks for the first 8 weeks...no way that my LO is going to get a spinal tap unnecessarily.


when niece was 3 when DS#1 was born. I put him in the swing. so she couldn't grab at him.

We have a strict adults must wash and disinfect policy if they want to hold the baby.

Re: What would you do?

thank you all so much for the advice

theyre coming from FL so I really cant change it now. I guess my overprotective mommy thoughts just started to kick in lol... but i will definitely be really firm on the handwashing for everyone and no touching for the toddler. Luckily DH agrees with me bc its his side of the family and i wont just look like a b*tch if he is saying the same things lol..... I think its more a problem of my SIL then the toddler, shes jsut a a kid. I kind of have to be blunt that she has to be responsible for the 3yo and not just let her do what she wants which is usually the case. SHe actually has to be watching her this time!

But I think if I am strict with the handwashing with everyone who comes over it will be better- they can blame if on crazy first time mommy and i dont care!

thanks for your advice and for listening to me vent! with 15 days to go the craziest things are stressing me out... poor DH!

Re: What would you do?

Posted by LightUpOurLife

You also need to tell your sister (if the case arises) that her kid needs to chill or go home.

Re: What would you do?

Since they are coming from FL I guess it's not possible for them to leave DD with a family member or a babysitter if you are uncomfortable. I would just make sure she washes her hands, doesn't have a cold, and I would limit any physical contact to just touching the baby's feet. Absolutely no touching the hands or face.

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Re: What would you do?

I don't let anyone except my own kids (cant help that lol) around the baby till it has its shots and gets the ok from the Dr!

Re: What would you do?

Posted by LightUpOurLife

You need to tell your sister that if her kid is sick, she can't come. You also need to tell your sister (if the case arises) that her kid needs to chill or go home.

Re: What would you do?

I would set up some ground rules with your niece-- here are my ideas:
1) do not touch the baby unless you have asked someone first.
2) make sure you wash your hands/use sanitizer before touching baby.
3) teach her which parts are safe to touch (feet).

That way, even if SIL is hands off, niece knows what the rules are and you can remind her of them.