I am sad...

In Oct when I went for my yearly appt my Doc said to come back and see her if I wasn't pregnant by the end of the year, since I am not I made an appt with a different doctor in the office since she was booked till end of Feb.

So I just had that appt. I went all prepared with my Fertility Friend papers of temping back since August. DH recently got a SA test. This Doc was so not concerned. She barely looked at my papers and was like your husband is fine, you look to be fine, maybe you just need more time?

When she said it doesn't count as infertility until one year (I am on month 6), I kind of insinuated that we have been trying for over a year, not trying really but honestly we haven't used protection since we've been married.

She said I can go for that tubal test with the dye but that it is a "cramping test". Next step is to see a fertility specialist. I know it can take healthy couples a year, but I was so sure with me it would happen the first time. I am so regular with my periods AND always get O pain 14-15 days before my Period comes.

I feel like I am timing it right and it's not working, not a good feeling. Although I may be premature with testing it at least makes me feel slightly more in control.

When I first tried TTC I was soooo anxious and nervous like am I really doing this? Now I am soooo sure I want a baby and I want one now.

Re: I am sad...

Re: I am sad...

Re: I am sad...

I cant give you too much advice other than maybe see another Dr. but here is my story, it might help. I too thought it would happen quickly for me. I have 28 day cycles every month. Temp and I O every month and have almost textbook charts. DH has 3x the sperm than what they say is normal.....the dr even high fived him. I had the HSG (the test you want) it was clear. SO there is absolutely nothing wrong with us. 15 months later we are still trying. The only thing I have against me is my age.

My Dr is having me do IUI because I have unexplained infertility.

If you do not like the answer of the Dr you saw see another. There might not be anything wrong with you and you might just need more time or you might need a little help. The right Dr will walk you through all your options.

Re: I am sad...

Maybe try and make an appointment with YOUR doc instead of the other doc, especially since your appointment didn't go so well. Sounds like your doc has your best interests in mind.

Re: I am sad...

Honestly...I was just like you. I really wish now that we started seeing an RE (specialist) so much sooner. They can do way more advanced testing and this is their field-getting women pregnant!

I went off the pill in Oct 2007. Same thing, I was always regular, etc. The doc said give it a year and then we could see a specialist. Well, we decided to call right after the 2008 holidays. I had my first appt. with my RE at the end of Jan. 2009. We had a bunch of tests run. It took a couple months. I had a laparoscopy that May to rule out endometriosis. He said we are both picture perfect.

He told us to take the summer off, no charting, etc. and have fun (we had 2 vacations booked that year) and to see him in Oct. He told us I have unexplained infertility and he laid out all our options, IUI, IVF, etc. We left and our heads were spinning. I cried so much that day.

We called our insurance and we had no IF coverage. We decided to switch to my insurance and start treatment in Jan. I had my first IUI Jan. 2010. I got ku on my 4th iui but had a miscarriage.

I just had my 7th iui and if this doesn't work, we're moving onto IVF. I'm sorry I wrote a whole novel here but here I am in 2011 with no baby. I NEVER thought it would take us this long. My advice, see an RE.
FYI, I am 31 now and DH is 36. GL!!!!

Re: I am sad...

my story is different but my experience with ob/gyn was the same. they just really dont take you seriously with charting for some reason. its a shame. i would suggest either another ob/gyn or an RE at least for testing. if it comes out clear then you can decide whether you want to keep trying or move on to other options. but at least you will have someone listening to your concerns.

Re: I am sad...

I hope it works out for u, keep POSITIVE!!

Re: I am sad...

I would def call your doc and speak with them directly since you are primarily in their care... How old are you? If you are close to your mid-30's you can still probably see an RE after 6 months of trying. When you speak to your doc, youc can say it was really 1 year if you need a referral. I think from the last time I was TTC, you can see the doc for the first appt anyway, it's just a consult. Its really is if it is determined yuo need continued care it becomes an insurance issue? I could be making that up-- but it's worth looking into.

I know what you mean about being all prepared with your notes and paperwork. I had that happen to me too...

Re: I am sad...

I am 29, DH is 34.

I recently read taking charge of your fertility and while I liked it and thought it was great I feel like a lot I already knew. And part of the book said couples timing BD-ing perfectly should take only about 4 cycles. That depressed me. I am completely timing everything correctly.

I do love my regular doctor but even if she read my charts what can she do, besides also sending me for the same test and then to an RE. I am really scared of unexplained infertility, because when you have an identified problem I feel like you can then fix it.

She did say the RE would test my husbands sperm against my CM to see if it's compatible. Oh and I should mention I've been going for acupuncture for 2 cycles and now this will be my third. It's relaxing and made my periods so much less crampy, so I hope the 3rd time is a charm.

I am such a planner and go getter and it's so horrible to not be in control of something I am choosing.

Does anyone know if the dye test is painful? I have to do it between day 8 and 10 of my next cycle, and I work full time so it's super hard and annoying to schedule dr's appts.

Re: I am sad...

im sorry..i know how frustrating this is..i am onmonth 9..if u feel frustrated i would go see another doc..u dont have to tell ur old one u r going but just go get a second opinion

u could even see a re and see what they have to say

Re: I am sad...

I could have written this myself!! I know exactly what you're going thru. Im on to cycle 6 and I went for the endometrial biopsty and it came back normal. Next step is SA and the dye test. I decided not to do it for another 2 months to take the testing and "science" out of the whole experience b/c I really do want it to happen naturally. My cycles are pretty regular as well and I also love that temping makes me feel like Im in some type of control.

I would defiitely speak to YOUR doctor about your concerns and mention that you like to go forward with additional testing if that's what you decide you want. I know TCOYF says if you temp/chart and your not preggers within 4-6 months then you should seek medical assistance. That freaked me out a bit too.

Im sorry for what you're going thru. It's frustrating, exhausting and it just feels wrong. We do everything right and come up with nothing but AF :(

Good luck.. the boards are always filled with helpful advice and is a good place to vent as well.

As you said, it can take healthy couples up to a year. I read these statistics about getting pregnant
50% within 6 months
75% within a year
85-90% within 18 months.

Re: I am sad...

Re: I am sad...

It's nice that I can kind of talk to people here because IRL no one knows. I think it would be that much worse if they did.

I know people are starting to talk because we've been married over a year now, but when people ask I kind of laugh it off and am like haha pass me some more wine!

I tried to talk to DH tonight about it and he is just SO not concerned. "Like don't worry it'll happen". He has 3 close friends that all took some time, one took a year, another 1.5 and a third 5 years, so he thinks 6 months is nothing.

However all 3 who had trouble all got accidentally pregnant the first time, before marriage for any of them. So not to minimize their suffering (esp the one for 5 years!) but at least you'd know it is even possible to get pregnant in the first place. And his best friend had 2 children, it was the 3rd child that took a year to conceive.

I think I am just going to go ahead with the dye test if this cycle doesn't work. And if the test is normal go straight to an RE.

And btw why is everyone in Hollywood pregnant within the last few weeks, pregnancy is ruining my E! news watching and taking over my People magazine reading! I am trying not to obsess and they are not making it easier.