Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

I have Unexplained IF.........only issue was elevated NK cells but they were down to normal within a month........four months of normal levels.....and still not PG. Im going on TTC for 2 1/2 years and even though I have a feeling I will have a child some day.........sometimes I feel that my mind is just convincing me of that and maybe there is a chance it won't ever happen.

I just can't understand it. It's something sooo out of my control......that it scares the $hit outta me. There is absolutely nothing I can do. Even IVF......I havent gone thru it....but even that isnt 100% guaranteed so I figure why allow myself the letdown if that doesnt work either? Ugh.......... TTC truly sucks when it doesn't work. : /

Just venting...........Thanks for reading!

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Absolutely. This is something I've been struggling with for the past few months...maybe even a year now: the lack of control over the situation. It's unusual to know that no matter how hard I try or what I do, the ultimate result is not up to me.
It's really frustrating and many times a day I think "not fair."

That said, try not to lose hope. Have your down days but then forge ahead.

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Every minute of every day.

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

I could have written that exact same post WORD FOR WORD. I too have unexplained and have been trying for 2 years. Honestly, before i started trying, it never even occured to me that it would ever be a problem?!?!

And yes, as time goes by, I fear that i will never have children. Especially after all these hormones, meds and IUI's. It is the most frustrating and helpless feeling

FM anytime.

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

I dont know your age but i would say.. if you can.. keep your hopes up. I have been trying for years. DH was afraid to lose the "wrapper" before we got married. After we got married, he thougt it would happen instantly. Well needless to say two years later, we are still childless and trying to figure out a way to have a child. I am 39. We tried IVF and it failed due to re error. My best advice for you to is to learn everything that you can including all the failures from others. I know that is hard but it might enlighten you to not repeat others mistakes.

afm... my story is everything was great except they were having problems finding my ovaries during ivf stims. when it came to retrieval my re was on vacation and another re did retrieval.. he only took one egg out and said i had organs in the way. he left the rest of the eggs in me. I should have had a iui and transfer of the one egg if it made it.. well the one egg did make it but at my age i am suppose to have 3 eggs transfered to get pregnant. It didnt happen.. Poor little embie couldnt implant. (no i didnt have a chemical pregnancy.)

I hope this helps.

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Every single day I think about the possibility of not being able to get pregnant. I'm on my first round of fertility treatment (IVF) and trying to stay positive is so hard.

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

all the time...

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

I'm just starting my infertility journey and I feel like I am up and down like a rollercoaster. One minute im fine and then the next I think it is never going to happen!

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

I keep reading your post and have been trying to think how to answer without scaring anyone (LOL).

Over the last 3 years (been at this for 4 1/2yrs) I've had 6IUI's, 4IVF's and 1 DE IVF - all negative failed cycles. Not to mention 1 m/c from a natural cycle 3yrs ago (only time ever pg). So, yeah, I get scared its not going to work as I'm on the backup backup plan at the moment.

But, I also know myself and I don't give up easily (as you can see). So, somehow, someway, I'll make something work. May not be what I thought (is anything ever?) but I know in my heart I'll find my way.

And like pp said, you have to research all you can. I'm still learning new stuff all the time. In fact I just learned 2 things that were probably stopping every cycle from having a chance.

Hopefully, you will find your way also and a lot quicker than I.

And lately I have been making a point to "just be happy". I have decided that IF has taken too much of my life already and I am still living in this moment. I can choose to be mad and upset or I can choose to be happy and enjoy each day. And since I did, I have been having much better days. I'm more productive at work etc... I know its easier said than done and I do sometimes catch myself with negative thoughts, but then I just let it go. Sounds kooky right?

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

My RE is pretty confident it will happen for me but I still let this go through my mind...

I am on my second medicated IUI cycle so we haven't been doing this as long as many people.. though this cycle I had FOUR follies and a BFN today .. So it makes me feel like, if this isn't our cycle, what went wrong?!?! Why didn't it work with FOUR?!

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Thank you for all your replies. It's nice to read everyone's perspectives. I just know will be on her merry way tomorrow (on time always) and it's just a constant reminder of another month that didnt work. My RE also has confidence that I will get PG.....but when it hasnt happened yet, Im losing ALL hope.

The summer usually gets me by because I will keep busy. DH used to be my rock and now I know its starting to take a toll on him too. I don't have any answers for him as he doesn't understand why its not happening for us either. It breaks my heart! I guess I'm more scared of how hurt he is more than anything.

You know the saying "always a bridesmaid.....never the bride". Well lately, I'm feeling "always the Godmother, never the mother"........

Hugs....Prayers......and a Near-End to this IF Journey for all of us!!

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Re: Do you ever get scared that it's not going to happen?

Posted by daisy32

Posted by BA2008

I keep reading your post and have been trying to think how to answer without scaring anyone (LOL).

Over the last 3 years (been at this for 4 1/2yrs) I've had 6IUI's, 4IVF's and 1 DE IVF - all negative failed cycles. Not to mention 1 m/c from a natural cycle 3yrs ago (only time ever pg). So, yeah, I get scared its not going to work as I'm on the backup backup plan at the moment.

But, I also know myself and I don't give up easily (as you can see). So, somehow, someway, I'll make something work. May not be what I thought (is anything ever?) but I know in my heart I'll find my way.

And like pp said, you have to research all you can. I'm still learning new stuff all the time. In fact I just learned 2 things that were probably stopping every cycle from having a chance.

Hopefully, you will find your way also and a lot quicker than I.

And lately I have been making a point to "just be happy". I have decided that IF has taken too much of my life already and I am still living in this moment. I can choose to be mad and upset or I can choose to be happy and enjoy each day. And since I did, I have been having much better days. I'm more productive at work etc... I know its easier said than done and I do sometimes catch myself with negative thoughts, but then I just let it go. Sounds kooky right?

You're an amazing woman Beth-Ann......you're outlook is incredible and I truly hope and pray that you and ALL THE WONDERFUL WOMEN on this board get the family you've always dreamed about xoxoxo