Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

DH and I have been talking about getting a kitten. I have been around pets my entire life (my mom wanted to be a vet growing up, so she wasn't too hard to convince!) Until our two family dogs passed away in November, we had two dogs and two cats. DH grew up with a turtle. He is not an "animal lover." He doesn't hate them, but he really didn't understand that they all have different personalities (ex: one of our cats is very large and very demanding. He likes to chase her down the hall). He loves our friends' dog and she likes playing with him, but just some of the comments he makes shows he didn't grow up with cuddly pets.

Was anyone's SO not an animal lover at first? Did having a pet change that?

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

DH did have cats growing up, but never dogs. And he would make comments that worried me because I treat Sofie (my yorkie) like my child. Nothing he said was heartless or anything, but he just had a whole different attitude toward her. He said he preferred bigger dogs and didn't "like" little dogs (that they weren't real dogs or something ridiculous like that ).

Anyway, now, as I type this he is cuddled up on the couch with her, snuggling and kissing her and talking to her like a baby. He has fallen madly in love with her and I sometimes get jealous of the attention he gives her and the attention she gives him.

I don't think everyone will have a change of attitude like him, but it is possible and depending on the pet I think it is likely (based on my personal experience only).

I hope you have a similar experience.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

DH was a dog person growing up--always had big huge dogs...and was raised to believe that all cats should die and are disgusting animals. he used to hate being around any cat.

now, he loves our kitty and snuggles with him everyday. i got thim to realize that he didn't 'hate' cats, he just was regurgitating what his douchebag dad had taught him, and he had never even been around cats really.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

I know someone who thought their husband would get to love the pet they chose and it backfired. Not only did he consider it a nuisance, it was the source of many fights and emotional distress for them. He also was convinced that he was allergic to it (jury still out on that one) and when they got pregnant, he won the argument and they "got rid of it".

Some people just aren't animal people, and nothing will make them so. There is that possibility, and you can't assume they will just grow to love it. Some people never do, and resent an animal that they have to care for or make sacrifices for.

The responsible thing is to do research on breeds, personalities, grooming responsibilities, health problems, and make the decision together. A decision both of you can live with so that one person doesn't feel like they "lost" or compromised more.

Also, to make sure they spend enough time around the particular breed to make sure there's no allergy situation and agreeing that children will not change the status of that pet in the family unless there were extreme circumstances that could not be solved.

My DH only had one dog growing up, and it was for a short period of time. When we started talking about them years ago, we did a lot of research and he met many Labs. He does have allergies to some breeds of dog (even ones that are supposedly hypoallergenic!) but for some reason, he has very little difficulty with Labs in general, and none with ours.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

Can you foster a pet first and see how it goes??? Choose one that is adoptable so if you both fall in love you can keep him..

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

My DH was NOT a pet person, never had any pets and had allergies to dogs/cats. Also didn't think they could have such distinct personalities and that all animals are different just like people.

I am a animal lover, grew up with many cats... and told himI just could not live without a pet. We finally found a hypoallergenic dog that he sort of liked and could tolerate allergy wise..since he can never have a cat.

well my DH is a new man. We have 2 dogs now and he loves them so much, he says he could never go without a pet again. And I see how different he is with other animals, esp cats whom he never liked much. He has become QUITE the animal lover. I know from this that some people who didn't grow up with animals just don't know what they are missing (LOVE) and get quite used to the love of a pet once they have it.

Message edited 1/5/2009 10:37:25 AM.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

I came with 2 cats.
My husband never grew up with cats and didn't know how to treat them or even how to pick them up.
one day one of the cats escaped out the back door and he went out to catch her. He came back walking in the house holding the cat with his arms streched out as far from his body as they could be kept away.

Now he has warmed up to them and not he loves them as much i do.

I think he just needs time

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

Posted by dilb712

Can you foster a pet first and see how it goes??? Choose one that is adoptable so if you both fall in love you can keep him..

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

My DH is not a pet person at all. I had a dog and a parrot when he first met me and he knew they were part of the package. He made it a point to befriend my dog although my dog had some temperment problems. When my dog became a senior citizen and required a lot of assistance DH was wonderful. He helped me and was already quite fond of my fur baby. When the time came to say goodbye to him DH surprised me and cried also. He hates my bird though who is still with us! I recently got a hamster and he actually likes the hammie more than the bird. My dog passed almost three years ago and I am itching to get another although I know DH doesn't want one. We travel a lot now so I haven't pushed the issue. When the time finally comes to fill that hole in my heart I know DH will be dead against it but in the end will probably end up sitting on the couch with the little bugger feeding him cold cuts.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

I was not a pet person

Jake always had a million pets growing up and I was not allowed

2 years ago Jake asked if we could adopted pokey- my white persian cat

I said yes- but I had a million rules- he couldn't come in the bedroom - on the couch etc

I really never thought it was going to turn out the way it did

not only does pokey sleep on my pillow now- but he is the love of my life- he forever changed me into a better person- it's the best thing that ever happened to me!

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

i cannot even describe in words to you how against getting a cat my DH was... even before we were married, i would talk about getting a kitten and before the whole thought could exit my mouth he would say NO WAY IN HELLL!!

well - we have been fostering my friend's cat since august and DH loves him!! took him a while to admit it, but when he went away for the weekend last month, he came home saying that he MISSED the cat!!!

little shelter lets you "foster" a pet... not sure of the details, but maybe you could look into that?!

good luck!!

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

Dh wasn't a pet person at all. His family only had one dog, which misbehaved so they got rid of it (). He told me he kind of thought cats were useless.

Well we now have two cats and a dog, and will be adding another dog in February! DH LOVES them all. Actually having them and seeing their personalities and their happy little faces has really brought him over to the side of loving animals! I also do all the 'dirty' work (cleaning the litter, poop scooping, hairball/vomit cleanup as needed, etc), so I think that helps facilitate his love!

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

beside fish & birds, i never had pets growing up. you could never tell that
was the case with Jack & I. From the
first time i saw Jack, he took to me immeidately and i knew, he was the dog for me

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

I wasn't really a pet person. Growing up, we had one antisocial cat that we got was I was 13 - before that, no pets at all. I was a little scared of dogs, and really didn't like them much.

DH is allergic to cats, so that was out of the question, and he grew up with dogs and has always wanted one. I took a LOT of convincing. Up until the day we brought home our first dog, I still wasn't sure.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

I wasn't and still am not a pet person. Growing up we had some fish, they all died of course.

My husband has 3 cats. I don't mind one because she's so fat that she can't jump up and cause trouble and she doesn't scratch up everything. She does have issues because she's so fat so we have to cover up everything so she doesn't get poop on our stuff. It's annoying. Of course she's the old, sickly one so she'll go first She's the only one I can actually say i "love" in some way.

One is annoying, always whining and jupming up on the counters and she makes me sad because she's always running away from me when I try to pet her, even if she was just sitting with me in my chair. Yeah, some animal makes me feel like a loser! She also begs like a dog would, totally annoying, like, let me eat in peace. In general, she is okay.

I've already told DH that if we have kids then the 3rd cat has to go. He's crazy, one sec he's loving you and the next he's attacking one of the other cats. I wouldn't trust him around a child. He scratches up EVERYTHING. I can't put out the quilt my aunt gave us for our wedding, I have to covers up our best chair and he STILL goes UNDER the cover just to scratch it up!! And he doesn't learn... the other cat eventually stops jumping on the counter but this guy is so dumb, he does what he wants, no matter what. I get so mad at him sometimes but those cats come first to my hubby so he refused to give him away, no matter how upset and stressed I get. He's cute when he's being good.

A dog would be a deal breaker. Non-negotiable.

I can deal with his cats but I'm also looking forward to the day they're all gone. We'll be like 60 but whatever, one day it'll happen and then i'll finally be able to have nice stuff out again.

So in long conclusion LOL maybe he'll like the cat and maybe not.... I think a lot of it depends on his personality and the animals and how well they mesh. Good luck.

Oh and I think I'd get a cat instead of a kitten.. as cute as they are, they'd make me crazy, getting into everything and scratching up everything! Cats at least are a little less curious.

Message edited 1/8/2009 3:03:49 PM.

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

Posted by MeeshMosh

Posted by Beth1210


not only does pokey sleep on my pillow now- but he is the love of my life- he forever changed me into a better person- it's the best thing that ever happened to me!

aww!! how sweet!!!

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

i was ALWAYS a cat person- i had a cat growing up and always argued that cats were better then dogs- i was kinda grossed out how dogs licked you all the time and so demanding-
but NOW i have a dog and i cant even imagine my life without her!!!
so a pet can totally change a persons perspective!!

Re: Was anyone's SO not a "pet person?"

I HATED PETS...growing up (this will sound mean) i would kick dogs out of my way, throw puppies across the room to get away from me, etc. I made fun of everyone who had a dog and treated it like it was part of the family.....UNTIL....

I got my own dog. now i'm OBSESSED with my dog...i'm calling airlines bc I want to bring him with me to Greece this summer with us, etc. My heart breaks when he cries or if he's sick....

all my friends call my the "traitor" b/c i completely changed views. if i could change, your DH can definitely become a dog lover!