IVF fears

Is it normal to feel absolutely, soul gripping terror about embarking on IVF?

Not the process or procedure itself, but of getting a BFN at the end of it all, which I know is realistic.

Did everyone else go through this, and how did you allay that terror and move past it?

Message edited 8/8/2008 4:03:17 PM.

Re: IVF fears

Absolutely. It's a HUGE commitment and the fear of the unknown is always the worst.
I think that as someone who was told that IUIs won't work for us, we ran out of options... I mean I know there are other options out there but this is the one we chose to explore right now. Anything that could lead to a BFP is a step in the right direction Good luck Beth!!!

Re: IVF fears

I'm with you on this Beth. I'm scared after all of this getting a BFN!

Re: IVF fears

every time

But, you just forge ahead...you do what you have to do...I wish I had a better answer

Message edited 8/8/2008 4:48:42 PM.

Re: IVF fears

Posted by LisaW

every time

But, you just forge ahead...you do what you have to do...I wish I had a better answer

Re: IVF fears

IVF is a huge gamble and at best you have a 50% chance of it working. Of course it's terrifying. The only thing keeping me sane right now is that if it doesn't work, I can look toward a FET.

Re: IVF fears

Horrified, terrified, petrified pretty much sums it up for me.

We just committed to our first (and hopefully only) IVF cycle for September. My Dr is convinced that my tubes just don't work properly and IVF is the way to go.

I'm not afraid of the meds and their effects. I'm not afraid to spend the money (well ok I am a little afraid of that). I am TERRIFIED that it just won't work. I feel like its our last resort and if this doesn't work, than nothing will

Ugh Debbie Downer your table is ready. Sorry for the negativity.

ETA: If it doesn't work...I will find the strength to move forward. We all will. It's our only choice!

Message edited 8/8/2008 6:07:24 PM.

Re: IVF fears

Posted by MrsRbk

Posted by LisaW

every time

But, you just forge ahead...you do what you have to do...I wish I had a better answer

What Lisa said.

Re: IVF fears

The only thing keeping me going is that I refuse to give up. I am young & healthy and there is NO reason why I will not be a mom!

What did FDR say ( I think it was him?) Nothing to fear except fear itself. Push the fear away. You will never know unless you try.

Re: IVF fears

I was absolutely terrified of failure becuase I was sinking SO much money into it. What made me go through with it was the possibility of having frozen embies leftover (which we were lucky enough to have) and that our odds were going to be SO much better then the IUI''s we had wasted our time with. Once we decided to do it, I just kept a very positive attitude. Yes, I was setting myself up to be devastated if it failed, but it got me through the process with a little bit of sanity. Best of luck to you- once you get started it's not so bad

Re: IVF fears

It is a tough road, but when it happens it is worth it. Unfortunately, I can tell you from experience that it is an emotional roller coaster. Try to stay positive. Good luck to all.

Re: IVF fears

It is the worst roller coaster ride ever...and no matter how many times you do it, you go through the exact same emotions...no matter how much you tell yourself you won't.

All you can do is take a deep breath and jump in....

Re: IVF fears

I feel the same. I am so scared. Besides the emotional toll, it's like throwing 20k in the garbage pail.

Re: IVF fears

I just had my IVF consult last night and feel the same way. I'm not worried about the medications, procedures, Dr. appointments, or the $$. It's the "what if this doesn't work" thoughts that get to me.

Re: IVF fears

I am definitely scared of the BFN...but I'll just do it all again if need be. It's a mindset I guess. I can't get too excited about this round until I see a BFP. The odds are so much better than an IUI though.

ETA: did I just write that? b/c I'm 2 hours away from my transfer and I'm totally FREAKING OUT! Hop on the emotional rollercoaster Beth...it's tons of fun! haha

Message edited 8/9/2008 8:34:24 AM.

Re: IVF fears

Why dont I give you the flip side of things....I have done one IVF cycle and wasnt scared at all. I was dead on positive that everything would go right, the planets would align, and I would get my BFP. guess what...BFN. And I was devestated (I can still think back to the beta day in the REs office and have tears come to my eyes). In hindsight, I think its better to be scared. That means you're prepared for the possibility that it may not work. Once you accept the less than 50/50 aspect to this process it is easier to accept. Now I just keep thinking of it in terms of Atlantic City. "10K on Black" I'm in this to win and know that I may have to lose a few times but in the end I will come out that big winner.

Hang in there

Re: IVF fears

ITA with everyone and I'm also scared not to do it. Does that make sense? I gotta give it my all and if it doesn't work at least I know I did the best I could.