Birthday party haters

Is there some sort of anti-birthday party movement going on?

I’ve had 2 separate people tell me that they don’t accept invitations to birthday parties because weekends are “family time” and shouldn’t be “wasted by friends.” Uh, ok? I guess celebrating a child’s birthday with them is a “waste?”

I’m so confused. Is this really a thing? I make every attempt possible to attend children’s birthday parties. They want their friends there and get so excited, I think it’s awful to not join them (unless you have a conflict, of course).

Re: Birthday party haters

Wow I have never heard of this!
I had a party for DD in June at a little girl spa type place and was hoping I'd get some no's because the price only included 8 girls plus the bday girl and I ended up with everyone saying yes and I had to pay a fortune.
But it was worth it to see her so happy with all her friends and they all had so much fun.

I can't imagine declining a party because the weekends are "family time". And I work full time. These parties are only a few hours tops and I welcome the chance to get her out of the house and out of my hair for a bit- she gets bored at home.

Birthday party haters

I have never heard of that----wow!

Unless DD tells me she doesn't want to go to a particular party (only happened once) or we have a conflict, we go to all parties she's invited to. She gets excited to see everyone outside of school. I too work almost 50 hours a week and dh sometimes works 6 days a week, but we still attend what she can.

Re: Birthday party haters

I have never heard of that.

The only bday parties that I will decline are one that I know my son wouldn't be able to handle (he has special needs). But it's not because I wouldn't want to go because I need "family time".

Birthday party haters

Thank you. I thought it was horrible.

Birthday party haters

I get what she's saying - though she could have been nicer about it.

There is nothing wrong with people prioritizing different things - some people don't get to spend a lot of time with their kids during the week so they prioritize that on the weekends and other things have to slide. There is nothing wrong with wanting family time - this is not how I live, but I don't think the idea is horrible or anything. People could have been nicer in declining though.

I don't go out of my way to get my kids to parties though - they are still pretty little though, so I imagine when they are a bit older and actually know about the parties we will make more of an effort to go. Sometimes I have other things I'd rather do on a Saturday.

Message edited 9/13/2018 4:34:00 PM.

Birthday party haters

I wouldn't take it personally. The only thing I'd have an issue with is the wasted with friends comment. Wanting to spend time with family on weekends is perfectly understandable to me although we do go to most parties assuming we don't have a conflict.

Birthday party haters

It’s not my child’s party they declined. This was a general conversation.

I get everyone has thejrpriorities but what happens when no one shows up to a child’s birthday party because parents are teaching their kids that fostering friendships is a “waste?” How would they feel if it were their kid?

These particular parents see their children plenty, but I find it hard to believe that any parent spends so little time with their kids that they can’t set aside 1.5-2 hours on a weekend.

I don’t know, I just can’t wrap my head around it.

Re: Birthday party haters

It’s certainly not a nice way of saying things... but there are certainly weekends that we plan things with family (like apple picking this weekend) and we say no to invites.

I try to make 50% of parties, but all of good friend parties. With 3 kids... it’s a lot.

I remember trying to make all parties my first was invited to... but we would lose out on weekends together!

Re: Birthday party haters

Message edited 9/13/2018 5:22:10 PM.

Birthday party haters

Wow, just wow. People in general are becoming haters of everything lately.

Birthday party haters

I get it to an extent. I would say my dd goes to at least half of parties shes invited to - averaging 1-2 parties a month. We bring her to the parties of her friends and kids she gets along with well. But during the school year, we only have Saturdays as a family so we're not willing to give up every weekend so dd can go to the party of a kid she barely knows or doesn't really play with much at school. It's nice if parents to invite the whole class. But we dont feel obligated in those situations. We'd rather spend time as a family going somewhere we'd all like to go. But we never just stay home an do nothing on DHS days off. We always plan fun outings. That time and those experiences are important to us. But, like I said, we do set aside to the time for dds close friends. Just cant do it all the time, since at dds age she seems to get constant invites! I cant keep up!

Birthday party haters

Honestly, it almost seemed like they were angry about the fact that kids were even having parties. Like "how dare you attempt to inconvenience me with your birthday?" It was truly bizarre and even stranger that two of them felt the same way.

Birthday party haters

So, judging by some of these responses it looks like my answer is yes, it is a thing.

Birthday party haters

I get it. Weeekends are family time. Do I have a blanket no to parties but we do decline. We also have families that have multiple kids and parties every year so it gets to be a bit much. But maybe that’s cause we don’t do Birthday parties every year for my son.

Re: Birthday party haters

Re: Birthday party haters

We try to go to all classmate parties unless we have an actual conflict. I have noticed that there are few kids who I’ve never seen at any party, so I’d say some people just don’t do birthday parties.

Birthday party haters

unfortunately, I have heard others say the same thing. Literally "weekends are family time". I don't get it - my kids love going to birthday parties. We only decline if we already have another obligation.

Re: Birthday party haters

Never heard of this, but I'd roll my eyes, put them down as a no and never invite them again!

ETA: And of course I would decline a party if we had something going on, even if it was a simple plan of making a family day at the beach or whatever, but to say no to every party ever?

Message edited 9/14/2018 9:09:33 AM.

Re: Birthday party haters

Re: Birthday party haters

Posted by Momma2015

Never heard of this, but I'd roll my eyes, put them down as a no and never invite them again!

Birthday party haters

I think what’s throwing me off is the fact that these kids parties are 2 hours MAX and usually in the morning.

What do you do with your children that being at a party from 11-12:30 every once in a while would take away from family time? Furthermore, these kids are little so they aren’t drop off parties which means the parents are doing whatever activity WITH the kids.

I’m just not computing.

Message edited 9/14/2018 9:22:50 AM.

Re: Birthday party haters

Posted by LuckyStar

Posted by Momma2015

Never heard of this, but I'd roll my eyes, put them down as a no and never invite them again!

The best part is one of them is always asking about a play date. So they can have non-family time as long as it isn’t in the context of a party, I guess.

Re: Birthday party haters

Re: Birthday party haters