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Mill188
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 3073 total posts
Name:
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a traveling with friends wwyd - UPDATED
Please settle a debate in our house:
DH and I are taking a vacation with our best friends (we have traveled with them several times before). We have a long flight coming home.
Is it rude if DH and I book first class tickets for ourselves. The option for first class exists for our friends but they have some financial concerns that DH and I don't have.
One of us says it's not rude at all and after spending 2 weeks with them, it's ok if we are seated in separate sections of the plane. The other one says it's rude and we should suck it up and go coach with them even though we won't be sitting WITH them.
Thoughts?
1-20-17: DH and I booked our first class seats last night after dinner. We just said, we are booking this flight and these seats, and these are the prices. They are booking their flights today. They are absolutely free to find their own flight home (although that was the cheapest I could find and I looked EVERYWHERE).
Flat bed service home from Hawaii here we come!!
Message edited 1/20/2017 9:22:39 AM.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:24 AM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult

Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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a traveling with friends wwyd
I don't think it's rude. You don't have to be attached at the hip, just because you are vacationing together. And like you said, even if you book coach, you wouldn't be sitting together, so it shouldn't make any difference if your'e in 1st class or somewhere else in coach. If I were your friends and found out you didn't book 1st class because of me, I'd feel really bad.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:29 AM |
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DMT
LIF Adult
Member since 6/05 2277 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Why not give the upgraded seats to your friends and surprise them with a really special treat!
Message edited 1/19/2017 9:31:44 AM.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:30 AM |
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phoenix913
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05 3034 total posts
Name: V
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
As someone who would never be able to book first class tickets, I think I would feel a little offended. I don't know if it's rude exactly, but it would feel a little like you're showing off that you can afford it. I totally understand why you would want to book first class and I definitely don't fault you for that. But I'm just trying to explain how your friends might see it.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:33 AM |
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Mill188
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 3073 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by DMT
Why not give the upgraded seats to your friends and surprise them with a really special treat!
We thought of that but that's not in the budget.....
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Posted 1/19/17 9:34 AM |
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DMT
LIF Adult
Member since 6/05 2277 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by Mill188
Posted by DMT
Why not give the upgraded seats to your friends and surprise them with a really special treat!
We thought of that but that's not in the budget.....
I meant you guys sit in coach and send them to first class....no added fee to the budget if you were going to sit in first class anyway.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:36 AM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!

Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name: Marisa
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Your taking a 2 week vacation together, correct? So your friends can obviously afford to take a 2 week vacation. They may not, after that, ALSO be able to afford the first class flight - totally understandable ........
But, it's not like you're going to Morton's and they're eating McDonald's ......it's the flight home after 2 weeks of vacation! Just book your flight.
If you're not booking together anyway, and not planning to sit together - it's a non issue
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Posted 1/19/17 9:36 AM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!

Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name: Allison
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a traveling with friends wwyd
I leave my family in the back!!!!LOL. I travel for work so I get upgrades sometimes. I would not feel bad.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:37 AM |
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Mill188
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 3073 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by phoenix913
As someone who would never be able to book first class tickets, I think I would feel a little offended. I don't know if it's rude exactly, but it would feel a little like you're showing off that you can afford it. I totally understand why you would want to book first class and I definitely don't fault you for that. But I'm just trying to explain how your friends might see it.
We are not trying to show off that we can afford it, but our lifestyles are a little different. We don't have 2 children in college like they do. This was a special trip I planned for DH's big birthday. We told them we were going and they said they wanted to come along. It's not like we "invited" them but we were certainly very happy they wanted to join us.
This will only be on the way home on a red-eye flight.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:38 AM |
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Mill188
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 3073 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by DMT
Posted by Mill188
Posted by DMT
Why not give the upgraded seats to your friends and surprise them with a really special treat!
We thought of that but that's not in the budget.....
I meant you guys sit in coach and send them to first class....no added fee to the budget if you were going to sit in first class anyway.
Oh that's not going to happen! We love them and all, but there are limits
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Posted 1/19/17 9:40 AM |
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luvbuffet
LIF Adult

Member since 7/10 6470 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
just book it and tell them when you went to check in they offered first class to you for $50. lol
i upgraded to business on an international flight for $9 once. total error on their part but it can happen!
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Posted 1/19/17 9:43 AM |
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pjt212301
LIF Adult

Member since 7/12 1215 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by chilltocam
I don't think it's rude. You don't have to be attached at the hip, just because you are vacationing together. And like you said, even if you book coach, you wouldn't be sitting together, so it shouldn't make any difference if your'e in 1st class or somewhere else in coach. If I were your friends and found out you didn't book 1st class because of me, I'd feel really bad.
I agree with this.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:45 AM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult

Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by Mill188
Posted by phoenix913
As someone who would never be able to book first class tickets, I think I would feel a little offended. I don't know if it's rude exactly, but it would feel a little like you're showing off that you can afford it. I totally understand why you would want to book first class and I definitely don't fault you for that. But I'm just trying to explain how your friends might see it.
We are not trying to show off that we can afford it, but our lifestyles are a little different. We don't have 2 children in college like they do. This was a special trip I planned for DH's big birthday. We told them we were going and they said they wanted to come along. It's not like we "invited" them but we were certainly very happy they wanted to join us.
This will only be on the way home on a red-eye flight.
Even more reason to not feel bad. If I were your friends, I wouldn't take it as you trying to show off. I might be a tiny bit envious, but I would never want you to not do something you want to do because of me. And especially since it is a trip YOU planned and they decided to join you, definitely do what you want for the flight home.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:45 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Book first class for yourself and don't give it a second thought. Everyone will be asleep anyway. Better that you sleep comfortably.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:45 AM |
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ap123
LIF Infant
Member since 10/10 268 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
It's fine. If you can sit more comfortably in first class and you can afford it, do it! There is nothing rude about it.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:45 AM |
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luvbuffet
LIF Adult

Member since 7/10 6470 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
its not like you are staying at a 5star hotel while your friends are in a hostel. just do it!
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Posted 1/19/17 9:46 AM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination

Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name: Karen
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a traveling with friends wwyd
Book it. After two weeks together you probably will need a little time apart. If I was your friends I'd feel guilty if you didn't book it because you thought I'd feel bad. Sneak them back one of those awesome chocolate chip cookies though if you have the chance lol : ).
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Posted 1/19/17 9:48 AM |
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Adri
Joy!

Member since 5/05 3116 total posts
Name: A
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Just do it. If you planned the trip for your DH's birthday, then more reason to do it, since it was them the ones that decided to join you.
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Posted 1/19/17 9:57 AM |
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Mill188
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 3073 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
So I just spoke to DH - we are going to book 1st class (my choice). We are having dinner with them tonight to finalize the booking and I will give them the flight details and the prices for coach, economy comfort, and first class.
They can book what they want. It was the same thing with the hotel, I gave them the prices for the various room types and let them pick and book what they wanted.
By the way, DH is the one who thinks it's rude....I don't see anything wrong with it. I told him that we will soften the blow by taking their luggage with us so they don't get hit with bag fees!
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Posted 1/19/17 10:01 AM |
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by Mill188
By the way, DH is the one who thinks it's rude....I don't see anything wrong with it. I told him that we will soften the blow by taking their luggage with us so they don't get hit with bag fees!
I think it's not rude at all and that is a very nice gesture on your part. Win-win!!
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Posted 1/19/17 10:04 AM |
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WhatNow
Say Cheese!

Member since 1/06 8033 total posts
Name: A (formerly WhatNow?)
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
I wouldn't. I would save the first class option for another time. And I know that my friends who ARE in a position to fly first class would do the same if in this situation.
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Posted 1/19/17 10:05 AM |
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Paramount
Sweet!

Member since 7/12 4289 total posts
Name:
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a traveling with friends wwyd
I think you should book. Its a BIG birthday. Its a BIG deal. I never understood why YOU should hold back because others cant afford.
To the people saying no here..it sounds like jealously. NOW HEAR ME OUT. I am NOT saying YOU are jealous. But the reaction IS jealously. I am the FIRST to admit that if I were going with friends and they got upgrades YOU BET I would be jealous. But not enough to be mad or upset.
But hell yeah. I would be sitting in back with my peanuts thinking about you having your full meal and full recliner.
And keep this in mind. You would not be sitting together on the flight anyway. If the plan was all of you sitting together then I might re-think this.
Book the flight. Its a big birthday so a special treat. And frankly, if they are the kind of friends that get bent out of shape about something like this then maybe you should re-evaluate the friendship. Life is too damn short to be upset about something so small.
I want to be clear again I am not calling anyone names. Just painting out the emotion behind it and NOT saying anyone here is jealous. *I* would be.....
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Posted 1/19/17 10:17 AM |
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Momma2015
Mommax2

Member since 12/12 6656 total posts
Name:
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Not at all! Just tell them you want to treat yourselves- it's your vacation, too! Actually, I don't think you owe them an explanation at all. Besides, how much socializing do you really do on the plane HOME at the end of a trip? Everyone is usually just tired and dreading going back to reality!
ETA: And I just saw it's a trip for your DH's birthday and they just jumped in after the fact! Say it was all part of the plan to treat him to first class before they even decided to come.
Message edited 1/19/2017 10:25:18 AM.
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Posted 1/19/17 10:21 AM |
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JennP
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 3986 total posts
Name: Jenn
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
If it wasn't a special trip for your DH's birthday that you planned and they joined you on I might say suck it up and stick with them but I think those are mitigating circumstances that cause your side to win out.
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Posted 1/19/17 10:32 AM |
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JennP
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 3986 total posts
Name: Jenn
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Re: a traveling with friends wwyd
Posted by DMT
Why not give the upgraded seats to your friends and surprise them with a really special treat!
It's really sweet that you thought of that!
That would be awesome if it were a birthday for the other couple!
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Posted 1/19/17 10:32 AM |
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