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Help with this situation
I gave my cousin a check for his engagement party. Almost 6 months later, it has still not been cashed. I am assuming he did not get it because who doesn't cash those checks promptly? I don't want him to think I stiffed him. But I also can't bring it up. It is awkward and everyone I spoke with personally about the situation so far was uneasy with me even asking about what to do. Anyway, I figured when his wedding rolls around, less than 6 more months... if it is still not cashed, I will just give my usual gift amount + the amount for the engagement check. However, lets say he DOES have the ORIGINAL check still at that point and tries to cash it almost a year after it was written... can he do that? I don't want to be overly generous to make up for the lost gift and then have the first check be deposited too... Online I am seeing different things about whether or not a bank will take a check that old. Any advice or information?
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Posted 12/3/15 9:03 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
RainyDay
LIF Adult
Member since 6/15 3999 total posts
Name:
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Help with this situation
I would check with your bank to see if they would even accept it. I think there is some time frame that a check is good for. If its still good then I would ask him if he ever received it. Then I would just write him a new one.
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| Posted 12/3/15 9:08 PM |
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ANewDayHasCome
Love multiplies, not divides
Member since 11/12 14481 total posts
Name:
Me
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Help with this situation
I would just ask him. Say "just want to make sure you received my gift bc I see it hasn't been cashed". I don't think that's weird.
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| Posted 12/3/15 9:08 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Help with this situation
Posted by ANewDayHasCome
I would just ask him. Say "just want to make sure you received my gift bc I see it hasn't been cashed". I don't think that's weird.
Me neither. I've been asked that! When DH and j were buying our house, we received gifts we didn't deposit immediately because we didn't want to have to justify it, and any check that wasn't payroll was questioned.
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| Posted 12/3/15 9:13 PM |
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JME78
LIF Adult
Member since 11/09 3672 total posts
Name:
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Re: Help with this situation
Why can't you bring it up?
Its totally reasonable to ask about a gift that hasn't been cashed in 6 months!
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| Posted 12/3/15 9:16 PM |
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jeanyus27
Life is beautiful
Member since 8/08 2543 total posts
Name:
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Re: Help with this situation
Posted by JME78
Why can't you bring it up?
Its totally reasonable to ask about a gift that hasn't been cashed in 6 months!
I agree!
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| Posted 12/3/15 9:31 PM |
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ChristinaM128
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 4043 total posts
Name:
Christina
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Re: Help with this situation
Posted by ANewDayHasCome
I would just ask him. Say "just want to make sure you received my gift bc I see it hasn't been cashed". I don't think that's weird.
I agree
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| Posted 12/3/15 9:37 PM |
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BabyBearA
LIF Adult
Member since 7/11 1254 total posts
Name:
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Help with this situation
I've asked in the past. Turned out they never got our gift. I resent it.
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| Posted 12/3/15 11:02 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Help with this situation
Of course you ask. Just send a text or an email and follow up. You got bad advice.
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| Posted 12/3/15 11:14 PM |
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Pumpkin1
LIF Adult
Member since 12/05 3715 total posts
Name:
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Help with this situation
Checks can be rejected after 180 days, so I think you should reach out to him.
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| Posted 12/3/15 11:20 PM |
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Re: Help with this situation
I would ask if he got the check. Although checks expire you never know what the bank will do.
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| Posted 12/4/15 4:50 AM |
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hmm
Sweet
Member since 1/14 8016 total posts
Name:
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Help with this situation
I gave a check to a friends son for a special occasion, it was never cashed. I wondered if his mother had given him my gift since I gave it to her to give to him. While we were talking one day I asked him if he received my gift, he said yes, but his mother gave him cash for it but they never cashed it. Plus, I never received a thank you note. Very odd
I would ask him if he received your gift.
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| Posted 12/4/15 5:28 AM |
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Help with this situation
I would totally ask them about it. I don't think there is anything wrong with that. I've both asked and been asked about an uncashed check.
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| Posted 12/4/15 6:52 AM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: Help with this situation
Did you ever get a "thank you" card from them?
I don't see anything wrong with asking if they received your gift. Just say you were balancing your checkbook and noticed the check was never cashed yet. Just want to make sure if never got lost.
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| Posted 12/4/15 7:00 AM |
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M514
Hi
Member since 8/10 6011 total posts
Name:
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Help with this situation
I would definitely ask. Maybe they misplaced it by accident.
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| Posted 12/4/15 8:47 AM |
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blu6385
Member since 5/08 8351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Help with this situation
Posted by ANewDayHasCome
I would just ask him. Say "just want to make sure you received my gift bc I see it hasn't been cashed". I don't think that's weird.
I agree there is nothing awkward about it.
it might be awkward if you asked if someone ever gave you gift.
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| Posted 12/4/15 9:16 AM |
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Mags1227
Just a mommy ...
Member since 10/10 2665 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Help with this situation
i would ask if they got it.
but if you are really uncomfortable with doing that, contact the bank and void the check. If they try to cash it, the bank will deny it.
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| Posted 12/4/15 9:35 AM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Help with this situation
I would ask. But to make it less awkward, try asking in an email or FB message. F2F or even the phone can be awkward because you feel awkward - so writing it may come out better.
Try saying you are going through your finances for the year being it's coming to an end and have found that check was never cashed. You feel terrible that you think he never received it... and go from there
Message edited 12/4/2015 9:41:04 AM.
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| Posted 12/4/15 9:40 AM |
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h0peful2015
LIF Infant
Member since 8/15 265 total posts
Name:
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Re: Help with this situation
i would just ask if he received it.
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| Posted 12/4/15 9:42 AM |
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AllyMally
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/13 881 total posts
Name:
Alyson
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Help with this situation
I would ask. He may not have gotten it or it was to late to cash after he found it. Life happens. I don't think it's weird at all. It would be weirder to get a check for my wedding and my engagement I think.
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| Posted 12/4/15 10:26 AM |
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AngnShaun
Sisters
Member since 1/10 21015 total posts
Name:
Ang
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Re: Help with this situation
Posted by jeanyus27
Posted by JME78
Why can't you bring it up?
Its totally reasonable to ask about a gift that hasn't been cashed in 6 months!
I agree!
im also curious why you cant bring it up?
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| Posted 12/4/15 10:28 AM |
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NYCGirl80
I love my kiddies!
Member since 5/11 10413 total posts
Name:
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Re: Help with this situation
Posted by ANewDayHasCome
I would just ask him. Say "just want to make sure you received my gift bc I see it hasn't been cashed". I don't think that's weird.
I agree. It's a normal thing to ask.
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| Posted 12/4/15 11:17 AM |
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JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
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Re: Help with this situation
I don't think it would be weird to ask. It's been 6 months and still hasn't been cashed.
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| Posted 12/4/15 11:19 AM |
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