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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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OMG tell me I am not the only parent
A FB friend just wrote a status asking about help with her 2 year old biting...
Some women wrote pepper, hot sauce, and soap.
My mouth is on the floor...I wrote that you shouldn't put anything in your kids mouth and one woman wrote her doctor told her to do that and everyone parents differently.
Umm last time I checked this isn't 1980 and shaming or hurting your child isn't really a good way to fix a behavior issue....holy crap I cant believe some of the comments.
ETA: I even wrote that putting things like that in your kids mouth is actually considered cruel physical punishment.
ETA: apparently I'm wrong, sorry to anyone who has done this.
Message edited 6/19/2013 2:51:22 PM.
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Posted 6/19/13 1:55 PM  |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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OMG tell me I am not the only parent
It's so funny you write this. Just the other day DH and I were watching TV (I can't think of the program right now) and the mom said to the kid 'do you want me to put pepper in your mouth again?'. And I turned to DH and said 'people don't really do that, do they?".
I guess they do.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:01 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
I don't see the big deal.
I don't think hot sauce or pepper or soap is going to kill a kid.
I wouldn't have said anything.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:02 PM |
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Ma-n-Pa2008
Mommy's Big Boy
Member since 3/09 2584 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by StaceyWill
It's so funny you write this. Just the other day DH and I were watching TV (I can't think of the program right now) and the mom said to the kid 'do you want me to put pepper in your mouth again?'. And I turned to DH and said 'people don't really do that, do they?".
I guess they do.
melissa gorga said it on RHNJ! I was just thinking about this!
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:02 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Jenn627
I don't see the big deal.
I don't think hot sauce or pepper or soap is going to kill a kid.
I wouldn't have said anything.
I think of it as a form of abuse...what is that teaching your kid? Do something bad and Mommy's gonna hurt you or make you gag?
I'm sorry maybe I am just crazy but I don't see the point in this
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:06 PM |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Ma-n-Pa2008
Posted by StaceyWill
It's so funny you write this. Just the other day DH and I were watching TV (I can't think of the program right now) and the mom said to the kid 'do you want me to put pepper in your mouth again?'. And I turned to DH and said 'people don't really do that, do they?".
I guess they do.
melissa gorga said it on RHNJ! I was just thinking about this!
Yes! That was it. Thanks
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:07 PM |
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InShock
life is good
Member since 10/06 9258 total posts
Name:
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OMG tell me I am not the only parent
I actually do think this falls under "everyone parents differently". While *I* would never choose this technique, it's certainly not equivalent to child abuse (I'm assuming we're talking about a small taste of each, not pouring a bottle of hot sauce down the kid's throat). To me, it's sort of like spanking, in that it's not for everyone, and many people even have moral objections to it, but it's not horrific. IMO, of course.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:08 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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OMG tell me I am not the only parent
hot sauce or pepper can burn a child's esophagus and cause the tongue to swell -- a potential choking hazard. Even soap...do you know what's in it? Would you eat it? Not to mention allergic reactions or fear of being hurt or threatened to be hurt. I don't know for me I can't look at my child being pained by something I do to them.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:16 PM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
A colleague of mine used to do this-he wife would carry a bottle of hot sauce around with her. I thought it was horrible.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:22 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by InShock
I actually do think this falls under "everyone parents differently". While *I* would never choose this technique, it's certainly not equivalent to child abuse (I'm assuming we're talking about a small taste of each, not pouring a bottle of hot sauce down the kid's throat). To me, it's sort of like spanking, in that it's not for everyone, and many people even have moral objections to it, but it's not horrific. IMO, of course.
That's how I feel...
I wouldn't look at it as "mommy's hurting you" but more like, there are consequences for your actions.
To the OP: clearly you're NOT crazy b/c other people feel the same way as you.
Also, I don't think I'M crazy. If my kid was a biter, I probably would try the hot sauce or pepper route.
No, I wouldn't eat soap, but I'd eat hot sauce and pepper.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:30 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Jenn627
Posted by InShock
I actually do think this falls under "everyone parents differently". While *I* would never choose this technique, it's certainly not equivalent to child abuse (I'm assuming we're talking about a small taste of each, not pouring a bottle of hot sauce down the kid's throat). To me, it's sort of like spanking, in that it's not for everyone, and many people even have moral objections to it, but it's not horrific. IMO, of course.
That's how I feel...
I wouldn't look at it as "mommy's hurting you" but more like, there are consequences for your actions.
To the OP: clearly you're NOT crazy b/c other people feel the same way as you.
Also, I don't think I'M crazy. If my kid was a biter, I probably would try the hot sauce or pepper route.
No, I wouldn't eat soap, but I'd eat hot sauce and pepper.
Shouldn't a consequence be something as being removed from the situation, time out, loss of playing etc. to show the child that if you are biting you cannot play with the other children why does it have to be resorted to something that has nothing to do with what they did. "If you bite you will get your tongue burned, gag on pepper, or at the taste of soap". I just don't think we should be putting things in our kids mouths as a form of discipline.
Trust me I'm not easy on my kids at all but I'm not seeing the point in this. I'm not questioning anyone's parenting skills by any means just don't get how this form of punishment isn't cruel?
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:38 PM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by 2boys1girl
Posted by Jenn627
Posted by InShock
I actually do think this falls under "everyone parents differently". While *I* would never choose this technique, it's certainly not equivalent to child abuse (I'm assuming we're talking about a small taste of each, not pouring a bottle of hot sauce down the kid's throat). To me, it's sort of like spanking, in that it's not for everyone, and many people even have moral objections to it, but it's not horrific. IMO, of course.
That's how I feel...
I wouldn't look at it as "mommy's hurting you" but more like, there are consequences for your actions.
To the OP: clearly you're NOT crazy b/c other people feel the same way as you.
Also, I don't think I'M crazy. If my kid was a biter, I probably would try the hot sauce or pepper route.
No, I wouldn't eat soap, but I'd eat hot sauce and pepper.
Shouldn't a consequence be something as being removed from the situation, time out, loss of playing etc. to show the child that if you are biting you cannot play with the other children why does it have to be resorted to something that has nothing to do with what they did. "If you bite you will get your tongue burned, gag on pepper, or at the taste of soap". I just don't think we should be putting things in our kids mouths as a form of discipline.
Trust me I'm not easy on my kids at all but I'm not seeing the point in this. I'm not questioning anyone's parenting skills by any means just don't get how this form of punishment isn't cruel?
Because this is not your parenting. You parent they way you want and others parent they way they want. Also maybe takignthem out of the situation didn't work. Usually parents are not complainign about their kids biting after one or two incidents.
And last time I checked a drop or two of pepper sauce did not BURN and the kids has proabably had more soap in their mouth during bathtime. So its really not as dramatic as you are making it out to be.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:42 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by alli3131
Posted by 2boys1girl
Posted by Jenn627
Posted by InShock
I actually do think this falls under "everyone parents differently". While *I* would never choose this technique, it's certainly not equivalent to child abuse (I'm assuming we're talking about a small taste of each, not pouring a bottle of hot sauce down the kid's throat). To me, it's sort of like spanking, in that it's not for everyone, and many people even have moral objections to it, but it's not horrific. IMO, of course.
That's how I feel...
I wouldn't look at it as "mommy's hurting you" but more like, there are consequences for your actions.
To the OP: clearly you're NOT crazy b/c other people feel the same way as you.
Also, I don't think I'M crazy. If my kid was a biter, I probably would try the hot sauce or pepper route.
No, I wouldn't eat soap, but I'd eat hot sauce and pepper.
Shouldn't a consequence be something as being removed from the situation, time out, loss of playing etc. to show the child that if you are biting you cannot play with the other children why does it have to be resorted to something that has nothing to do with what they did. "If you bite you will get your tongue burned, gag on pepper, or at the taste of soap". I just don't think we should be putting things in our kids mouths as a form of discipline.
Trust me I'm not easy on my kids at all but I'm not seeing the point in this. I'm not questioning anyone's parenting skills by any means just don't get how this form of punishment isn't cruel?
Because this is not your parenting. You parent they way you want and others parent they way they want. Also maybe takignthem out of the situation didn't work. Usually parents are not complainign about their kids biting after one or two incidents.
And last time I checked a drop or two of pepper sauce did not BURN and the kids has proabably had more soap in their mouth during bathtime. So its really not as dramatic as you are making it out to be.
I had a biter...I also can't eat anything hot without burning my mouth I couldn't imagine a toddler. I had soap put in my mouth when I was younger and I remember a feeling of fear and shame...and I was so young. I apologize that I've offended you enough to get defensive over it.
Agree to disagree...to each their own when it comes to forms of punishment and their kids. Sorry.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:46 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
I don't think it's cruel. I think it's not pleasant but certainly not cruel.
It's all subjective and you're not questioning anyone's parenting skills but I wouldn't have tried to publicly shame a fellow mom on FB by telling her that a dash of hot sauce or pepper or soap on her toddler's tongue is cruel.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:52 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by 2boys1girl
Agree to disagree...to each their own when it comes to forms of punishment and their kids. Sorry.
Exactly, which is why I wouldn't want to make anyone feel badly about their parenting - we get enough shit.
And is this what we consider abuse now?
eta: "badly"
Message edited 6/19/2013 2:56:50 PM.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:56 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Jenn627
I don't think it's cruel. I think it's not pleasant but certainly not cruel.
It's all subjective and you're not questioning anyone's parenting skills but I wouldn't have tried to publicly shame a fellow mom on FB by telling her that a dash of hot sauce or pepper or soap on her toddler's tongue is cruel.
Thanks! I deleted my comment on the status that said it was a cruel punishment.
I did however keep my ones giving my opinion on how to help it because that is what the OP had asked.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:57 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
I could never do it to my DD.
I wouldn't say anything to others who do it, but it's TOTALLY not for me.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:57 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
FTR - everyone else agreed with you, so you're not "wrong". You're not the only one who feels this way.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:57 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
You shouldn't have deleted. This is a great convo.
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| Posted 6/19/13 2:58 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Jenn627
Posted by 2boys1girl
Agree to disagree...to each their own when it comes to forms of punishment and their kids. Sorry.
Exactly, which is why I wouldn't want to make anyone feel badly about their parenting - we get enough shit.
And is this what we consider abuse now?
eta: "badly"
You know you hear horror stories about what they will take a child away for or investigate, Look up a case in Florida were kids were taken away for a mother repeatedly using soap in the mouth as a form of punishment.
I got my arse smacked with a spoon when I was younger, shoes thrown at my head if I was a smart arse....You know what would happen today if you get one CPS worker on a bad day? Maybe even if it wasn't for me or my way of parenting I'm just afraid of other forms of punishment because of how society views parenting and what is and what's not abuse now a days.
Message edited 6/19/2013 3:02:53 PM.
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| Posted 6/19/13 3:01 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Jenn627
You shouldn't have deleted. This is a great convo.
I meant deleted on my friends fb status, not here
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| Posted 6/19/13 3:01 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by 2boys1girl
You know you hear horror stories about what they will take a child away for or investigate, Look up a case in Florida were kids were taken away for a mother repeatedly using soap in the mouth as a form of punishment.
I got my arse smacked with a spoon when I was younger, shoes thrown at my head if I was a smart arse....You know what would happen today if you get one CPS worker on a bad day? Maybe I'm just afraid of other forms of punishment because of how society views parenting and what is and what's not abuse now a days.
I know.
And honestly, IMO, I don't think there's enough "punishment". I got beat with a belt and I was scared shitless of my dad and his belt BUT I also respected him, and my mom, and other parents, and my teachers, and police officers, etc. I just don't see that now. I don't think beating is the answer but I don't think this "time-out" stuff is the answer either.
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| Posted 6/19/13 3:05 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by 2boys1girl
Posted by Jenn627
You shouldn't have deleted. This is a great convo.
I meant deleted on my friends fb status, not here
gotcha
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| Posted 6/19/13 3:05 PM |
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WockaWocka10
LIF Infant
Member since 4/13 349 total posts
Name:
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OMG tell me I am not the only parent
I think that's pretty cruel and disgusting.
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| Posted 6/19/13 3:14 PM |
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nycgirl
Angels!
Member since 3/09 7721 total posts
Name:
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Re: OMG tell me I am not the only parent
Posted by Jenn627
Posted by 2boys1girl
You know you hear horror stories about what they will take a child away for or investigate, Look up a case in Florida were kids were taken away for a mother repeatedly using soap in the mouth as a form of punishment.
I got my arse smacked with a spoon when I was younger, shoes thrown at my head if I was a smart arse....You know what would happen today if you get one CPS worker on a bad day? Maybe I'm just afraid of other forms of punishment because of how society views parenting and what is and what's not abuse now a days.
I know.
And honestly, IMO, I don't think there's enough "punishment". I got beat with a belt and I was scared shitless of my dad and his belt BUT I also respected him, and my mom, and other parents, and my teachers, and police officers, etc. I just don't see that now. I don't think beating is the answer but I don't think this "time-out" stuff is the answer either.
ITA with THIS.
I don't know what the answer is: but "time out" doesn't always work. Have trouble with my own kid & bad behavior (occasional, but it's hard to deal with)... never-the-mind, I had a little boy come up, out of the blue, and SMACK my little girl. Surely, a "time out" would not be the answer... but what would?
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| Posted 6/19/13 3:17 PM |
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