LIFamilies.com - Long Island, NY


RSS
Articles Business Directory Blog Real Estate Community Forum Shop My Family Contests

Log In Chat Index Search Rules Lingo Create Account

Quick navigation:   

You must be a logged in user to report a bad post!

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted By Message
Pages: 1 [2]

mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!

Member since 3/09

8585 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I can't do it either. My mom would babysit when ever we wanted but we feel bad always asking her. We go out very infrequently. Dh wants to hire someone but im paranoid. I wish i could because id love to get out for a dinner once on a while. All I think about is that nanny in the city who killed those poor babies and I can't get past it. My younger dd also has horrific seperation anxiety and would cry for hours. I'm overly paranoid and admit it so for me there is no way.

Message edited 4/21/2013 9:50:46 PM.

Posted 4/21/13 9:45 PM
 
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource

olive98
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/12

791 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Message edited 4/22/2013 6:56:48 PM.

Posted 4/21/13 9:59 PM
 

Honey2223
LIF Adolescent

Member since 6/11

658 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by NervousNell

I can't do it.
I don't trust anyone in my home who is a stranger and I certainly dont' trust them with my DD.
You just never know.
Also- at 2.5 DD won't stay with a stranger. She is old enough to know the difference.
If it's not a family memeber that she spends a lot of time with- or a teacher from daycare- she wouldn't be comfortable alone with them.
I wouldn't be able to relax.
So for now, it's just my parents and sister who can watch her.
We rarely get out alone but I don't care.
I was never big into "date" nights.
We are married- we don't date anymore! Chat Icon



Pretty much this, word for word! If I absolutely had to, I would go with a recommendation/reference from someone I know very well and I would test them out a few times maybe while I'm still in the house or while I'm running quick errands so that I'm home and not gone a long time. I know it's hard to trust just anybody these days. But there are good babysitters out there!

Posted 4/21/13 10:48 PM
 

ali120206
2 Boys

Member since 7/06

17795 total posts

Name:

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes, I do - I have used teachers from daycare to babysit here and there when no family was available.

Also, when we go on vacation, I have used a babysitter that my friend recommended (who she uses).

Posted 4/22/13 8:07 AM
 

ali120206
2 Boys

Member since 7/06

17795 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by tara73

I found that those outside family tended to follow our instructions much more rigidly than my MIL or other family members did. Family seems more comfortable blowing off what we say because "their kids are fine" etc.



I found this too.

Posted 4/22/13 8:10 AM
 

LotsaLuv
Us

Member since 6/10

4094 total posts

Name:
F

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I would be Ok with it as long as the babysitter was reccomended and used by someone I know.

DH on the other hand is totally against it.

Posted 4/22/13 8:13 AM
 

Jax430
Hi!

Member since 5/05

18919 total posts

Name:
Jackie

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes. We hadn't done it up to this point because DD has some eating issues and I was not comfortable with it. However, my MIL watches DD two days per week, has other grandchildren to take of, and understandably cannot always be available. I always planned on finding a babysitter through recommendation or DD's daycare...as it turns out, we were kind of forced to, because DD's daycare is unexpectedly closed this week (long story). DH and I are each taking off 1 day, but today, one of the girls from daycare is at my house with DD. I am SO nervous, but I know she'll be fine.

Posted 4/22/13 8:48 AM
 

Onemoretime
LIF Adult

Member since 9/12

1077 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

We haven't, our kids have never had a sitter ( only family occasionally)

Posted 4/22/13 10:37 AM
 

JDubs
different, not less

Member since 7/09

13160 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes, we do now for DS a few mornings a week.. everything has been great so far. I could totally see your point about being nervous about leaving your DC with someone who you don't know, but I would ask for references to make you feel better/at ease.

Posted 4/22/13 11:12 AM
 

dlj97
LIF Adult

Member since 7/10

4399 total posts

Name:

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

We have a full time nanny that we found on sittercity. Is it hard to leave your child with a stranger at first, but we did a background check, checked her references and had her come a few times while I was home to get to know her. At 18 months you will know if your DC is happy with the sitter, even if they can't speak!

Posted 4/22/13 11:22 AM
 

MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!

Member since 5/06

14562 total posts

Name:
Marisa

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I'm not really sure what the level of difficulty getting pregnant or going through a pregnancy has to do with anything .......I had 2 uneventful fairly easy pregnancies and my kids aren't any less precious and important to me, as someone who went through years of fertility treatments or months of constant morning sickness ..........

Leaving youir kids w/ a babysitter to go out with your husband doesn't make you a bad mother - No one gets a medal for never leaving the house for the first x number of years olf your child's life .......

That being said, my kids have been in daycare since 6 months old. I didn't really HAVE to hire anyone until recently (b/c my sister also had a baby so now we share my parents time Chat Icon ) but I would have left them at 18 months, or a year, or even 6 months with the girl we currently hire ocassionally - She was their 'teacher' in the infant room @ daycare and we love her -

A lot of the daycare teachers are young college or masters program girls who are looking for extra money - If you can confirm a reputable daycare in your area, that may be an option for you as well! Good luck! - And enjjoy your date !!

Posted 4/22/13 12:18 PM
 

lynnd126
LIF Adult

Member since 3/11

2630 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by PregowithTwins

Posted by NervousNell

I can't do it.
I don't trust anyone in my home who is a stranger and I certainly dont' trust them with my DD.
You just never know.
Also- at 2.5 DD won't stay with a stranger. She is old enough to know the difference.
If it's not a family memeber that she spends a lot of time with- or a teacher from daycare- she wouldn't be comfortable alone with them.
I wouldn't be able to relax.
So for now, it's just my parents and sister who can watch her.
We rarely get out alone but I don't care.
I was never big into "date" nights.
We are married- we don't date anymore! Chat Icon



I am with you I can't do it either.
My Twins are 18 months & I have never been out alone with my husband ssince they have been born. I have accepted this though. I had a VERY HARD time getting pregnant. Now that I have them.... they will always come first.



I find this response kind of shocking. What do you think would happen if you hired a local babysitter and had dinner with your dh? How long do you intend to "accept" that you can't leave them? I just think the idea that this is "putting them first" is misguided.

Posted 4/22/13 12:31 PM
 

Oldusernewname
LIF Toddler

Member since 12/12

412 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

My DD is almost 6 and my DS is 7 mo, we don't have any family to help us other than my MIL who can't handle 2 kids, we hadn't been out on a date since I was 3 mo pregnant , we used to go out 1 a month before we had 2nd one and had my MIL watch my DD. never used a babysitterr or anyone but my MIL. BUT last week we decided to hire a babysitter. She is my DD's ballet teacher and we have "known" her for 3 yrs now, I spoke to bunch of people -in person- who have used her as a babysitter and they had nothing but great things to say about her. I also know the director of daycare she works for, I also spoke to her in person and asked bunch of questions. . So we hired her for occasional babysitting , maybe 1 every few months or so. We also got a nanny cam.
Honestly I could never leave my kids with someone from the internet , someone I have never met before and someone no one knows. But that's just me, I' paranoid like that and a control freak. I do not trust references from just random strangers because it is very easy to get fake references and recommendations.
Maybe ask around at local church or school ?

Message edited 4/22/2013 1:53:31 PM.

Posted 4/22/13 1:52 PM
 

wo0shply
LIF Adult

Member since 11/08

2702 total posts

Name:
Tass

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

We have a baby sitter who watches DD everyday. I understand your fears. When you interview you should see how they interact with your LO and if they get a long then you know its the right person. Thats what we did with our baby sitter and our DD LOVES her!

Posted 4/22/13 2:05 PM
 

BeachGal
LIF Adult

Member since 2/10

2827 total posts

Name:
J

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Do you mean at night when you go out to dinner or something? If so, I am waiting for my 2 babies get a little older. If they are both screaming I would be nervous that a teenager wouldn't be able to handle it! Regardless of rare instances of extreme horrific events I still have trust if someone was recommended and I would not live in fear. My neighbor just told me that her daughter babysits and I got really excited ! I personally wouldn't use a website but a recommendation I have no issue with.

Posted 4/22/13 2:31 PM
 

Wishing4ababy
My life is complete!

Member since 1/07

2494 total posts

Name:

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by MarisaK

I'm not really sure what the level of difficulty getting pregnant or going through a pregnancy has to do with anything .......I had 2 uneventful fairly easy pregnancies and my kids aren't any less precious and important to me, as someone who went through years of fertility treatments or months of constant morning sickness ..........

Leaving youir kids w/ a babysitter to go out with your husband doesn't make you a bad mother - No one gets a medal for never leaving the house for the first x number of years olf your child's life .......

That being said, my kids have been in daycare since 6 months old. I didn't really HAVE to hire anyone until recently (b/c my sister also had a baby so now we share my parents time Chat Icon ) but I would have left them at 18 months, or a year, or even 6 months with the girl we currently hire ocassionally - She was their 'teacher' in the infant room @ daycare and we love her -

A lot of the daycare teachers are young college or masters program girls who are looking for extra money - If you can confirm a reputable daycare in your area, that may be an option for you as well! Good luck! - And enjjoy your date !!



The only reason why I said how many years I TTC was because of the above poster comment. Even if I didn't have trouble TTC I would love my babies the same exact way.

Posted 4/22/13 5:01 PM
 

katiebug
I'll love you for always

Member since 2/08

4624 total posts

Name:
Katie

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by MarisaK

I'm not really sure what the level of difficulty getting pregnant or going through a pregnancy has to do with anything .......I had 2 uneventful fairly easy pregnancies and my kids aren't any less precious and important to me, as someone who went through years of fertility treatments or months of constant morning sickness ..........

Leaving youir kids w/ a babysitter to go out with your husband doesn't make you a bad mother - No one gets a medal for never leaving the house for the first x number of years olf your child's life .......




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Really not sure why not leaving your kids ever means you love them more then someone who needs to hire a sitter.

I have no family around to watch my DS, so I have a hired babysitter. Right before I was going to use care.com or one of those sites, I was at a birthday party and a girl there took to my child. She said she babysat all the time, she also did nanny work. I spoke with her friends, got some references, and she is fantastic. She now babysits for me, and my other friend.

Posted 4/22/13 6:29 PM
 

sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!

Member since 1/07

9764 total posts

Name:
Tricia

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by Wishing4ababy

Posted by MarisaK

I'm not really sure what the level of difficulty getting pregnant or going through a pregnancy has to do with anything .......I had 2 uneventful fairly easy pregnancies and my kids aren't any less precious and important to me, as someone who went through years of fertility treatments or months of constant morning sickness ..........

Leaving youir kids w/ a babysitter to go out with your husband doesn't make you a bad mother - No one gets a medal for never leaving the house for the first x number of years olf your child's life .......

That being said, my kids have been in daycare since 6 months old. I didn't really HAVE to hire anyone until recently (b/c my sister also had a baby so now we share my parents time Chat Icon ) but I would have left them at 18 months, or a year, or even 6 months with the girl we currently hire ocassionally - She was their 'teacher' in the infant room @ daycare and we love her -

A lot of the daycare teachers are young college or masters program girls who are looking for extra money - If you can confirm a reputable daycare in your area, that may be an option for you as well! Good luck! - And enjjoy your date !!



The only reason why I said how many years I TTC was because of the above poster comment. Even if I didn't have trouble TTC I would love my babies the same exact way.



Ditto.. The only reason I said something was because of the above poster saying that she had trouble getting pregnant and couldn't leave her children because they come first.

I think all of our children come first and I am honestly offended at the notion that going out without them means that they do not come first.

Posted 4/23/13 6:06 PM
 
Pages: 1 [2]
 

Potentially Related Topics:

Topic Posted By Started Replies Forum
Babysitter for RVC Family anyone interested PurpleC 1/7/13 0 Parenting
Is anyone's family NOT good as a babysitter? bella321 9/28/11 2 Parenting
Spinoff - non family babysitter... sunflowerjesss 7/8/10 11 Parenting
1st Non-Family Babysitter tomorrow night.. CaseyGirl 7/8/10 7 Parenting
How old is old enough to be left with a hired babysitter (non family or friend) Xelindrya 5/19/10 16 Parenting
Day Care, babysitter, nanny, family, you...... BigB 8/4/08 8 Multiple Births
 
Quick navigation:   
Currently 436819 users on the LIFamilies.com Chat
New Businesses
1 More Rep
Carleton Hall of East Islip
J&A Building Services
LaraMae Health Coaching
Sonic Wellness
Julbaby Photography LLC
Ideal Uniforms
Teresa Geraghty Photography
Camelot Dream Homes
Long Island Wedding Boutique
MB Febus- Rodan & Fields
Camp Harbor
Market America-Shop.com
ACM Basement Waterproofing
Travel Tom

      Follow LIWeddings on Facebook

      Follow LIFamilies on Twitter
Long Island Bridal Shows