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[elephant in the room]

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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!

Member since 5/09

18388 total posts

Name:
Allison

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

Let me put everyone onto this whole situation for a minute or two. I've known Erin Sayar for several years and it was very clear, to me at least, that she was suffering from post partum depression almost immediately after the birth of her daughter. She was a wonderful teacher through 2005-2006 when I had her English class- She struck me as an intelligent young woman with a head on her shoulders and as a teacher that cared both about the students and the literature. She was bright, funny, engaging, and had a girl next door kind of look to her----never sexy, but definitely pretty and undeniably cute.She was NEVER inappropriate with me in the classroom-although I would NOT have minded nor have blown it up to the entire world--- I fell out of touch with her after my graduation in 2007 but found her on FB a year or two later and we began chatting as we always had a good relationship. I was SHOCKED to see/hear just how much her demeanor, appearance, and outlook had changed in just 2-3 short years. She began covering herself in these HORRENDOUS tattoos and all of a sudden had this 'im hot shit' attitude (where was it when you were actually good looking a couple years back???) Anyway I'm really not trying to put this woman on blast on this gossipy-yenta site--especially a woman that was a great teacher and a kind person throughout my ENTIRE experience with her. But I do have to concur with others here that I reallllllly think her pregnancy hit her hard and that maybe it had some effects on her family/work/relationships. These pictures of her in the Daily News are just awful---she looks sky high on Xanax/Valium/Klonopin or something similar---and it is just awful how she's playing up for the cameras. WHETHER OR NOT SHE GETS CONVICTED, SHE WILL FOREVER HAVE THESE CHARGES ON HER RECORD AND ON HER REPUTATION. A far cry from the kind, cute, intelligent woman i knew in 2006...I feel very bad for her. I really think that post-partum depression, her naive use of prescription drugs, and the 'easy-going, lax a daisy' atmosphere ofr Madison all contributed to this. But poor judgement does not always constitute a bad person---I have my own long list of things I shouldnt have done-----but nothing up on the internet for the world to laugh at and mock.....lol.....peace.....and good luck miss sayar.....you were a nice lady....stop taking xanax



Taking drugs = poor jusdgement
Raping a child = Bad person

Posted 6/4/12 10:23 AM
 
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

It's laxidasical

Posted by MoralRelativity
But poor judgement does not always constitute a bad person---I have my own long list of things I shouldnt have done-----



Poor judgment & having sex with a minor are two very different things.

You're out of school for 5 years now? At 23, maybe you can see having a relationship with an 18 year old. At 30+, it's reprehensible - especially considering her position of authority.

I'm sure she was a very good teacher at one point. At this point, I'd say she cannot be trusted in a classroom.

My friend's cousin was a wonderful person too. Until she got hooked on percosets after her C-section, started stealing percosets & painkillers from new moms recovering from their C-sections & is now divorce, no contact with her child & a crackwhore. Drugs suck. Addiction sucks. Yes it will make people do things they probably never thought they'd do. I'm sure the homeless guy eating the other homeless guy in FL didn't think he'd be a cannibal either. If she's guilty (and it looks that way from what I can see), lock her up for a few years & make her register as the sex offender that she is.

Posted 6/4/12 10:26 AM
 

MySunshine
In love with my Baby Boy

Member since 3/11

2783 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

Let me put everyone onto this whole situation for a minute or two. I've known Erin Sayar for several years and it was very clear, to me at least, that she was suffering from post partum depression almost immediately after the birth of her daughter. She was a wonderful teacher through 2005-2006 when I had her English class- She struck me as an intelligent young woman with a head on her shoulders and as a teacher that cared both about the students and the literature. She was bright, funny, engaging, and had a girl next door kind of look to her----never sexy, but definitely pretty and undeniably cute.She was NEVER inappropriate with me in the classroom-although I would NOT have minded nor have blown it up to the entire world--- I fell out of touch with her after my graduation in 2007 but found her on FB a year or two later and we began chatting as we always had a good relationship. I was SHOCKED to see/hear just how much her demeanor, appearance, and outlook had changed in just 2-3 short years. She began covering herself in these HORRENDOUS tattoos and all of a sudden had this 'im hot shit' attitude (where was it when you were actually good looking a couple years back???) Anyway I'm really not trying to put this woman on blast on this gossipy-yenta site--especially a woman that was a great teacher and a kind person throughout my ENTIRE experience with her. But I do have to concur with others here that I reallllllly think her pregnancy hit her hard and that maybe it had some effects on her family/work/relationships. These pictures of her in the Daily News are just awful---she looks sky high on Xanax/Valium/Klonopin or something similar---and it is just awful how she's playing up for the cameras. WHETHER OR NOT SHE GETS CONVICTED, SHE WILL FOREVER HAVE THESE CHARGES ON HER RECORD AND ON HER REPUTATION. A far cry from the kind, cute, intelligent woman i knew in 2006...I feel very bad for her. I really think that post-partum depression, her naive use of prescription drugs, and the 'easy-going, lax a daisy' atmosphere ofr Madison all contributed to this. But poor judgement does not always constitute a bad person---I have my own long list of things I shouldnt have done-----but nothing up on the internet for the world to laugh at and mock.....lol.....peace.....and good luck miss sayar.....you were a nice lady....stop taking xanax



I get that you're trying to say something nice to defend her BUT:
As a student: why should you know she had PP depression? Those are things that are a part of her private life and not should be brought into the work place.
Why were you FB friends with your former teacher? Again there needs to be a distinction between "friends" and teacher-student relationship.
The fact that you said " had this 'im hot shit' attitude" just proves what everyone is trying to say. Why should a teacher have this attitude to her students?? It's just disgusting.

Posted 6/4/12 10:26 AM
 

Ayne11
Yep

Member since 1/09

18021 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Will she always have to register as a sex offender, going forward?

Posted 6/4/12 10:31 AM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by Ayne11

Will she always have to register as a sex offender, going forward?



If she's found guilty:
Level 1 offenders are required to register for a minimum of 20 years and Level 2 and 3 offenders for life

NYS Sex Offender Risk Level

Message edited 6/4/2012 10:36:19 AM.

Posted 6/4/12 10:35 AM
 

Celt
~~~~~~~~~~

Member since 4/08

7758 total posts

Name:
colette

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by Ayne11

Will she always have to register as a sex offender, going forward?



If she's found guilty:
Level 1 offenders are required to register for a minimum of 20 years and Level 2 and 3 offenders for life

NYS Sex Offender Risk Level



But I'm pretty sure there will be a sweet plea deal where this may not even be required, as she won't be convicted on the most serious charges.

Posted 6/4/12 10:37 AM
 

Ayne11
Yep

Member since 1/09

18021 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by colette

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by Ayne11

Will she always have to register as a sex offender, going forward?



If she's found guilty:
Level 1 offenders are required to register for a minimum of 20 years and Level 2 and 3 offenders for life

NYS Sex Offender Risk Level



But I'm pretty sure there will be a sweet plea deal where this may not even be required, as she won't be convicted on the most serious charges.



Such bull-shit

Message edited 6/4/2012 10:39:36 AM.

Posted 6/4/12 10:39 AM
 

MoralRelativity
LIF Zygote

Member since 6/12

19 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Message edited 6/4/2012 3:00:25 PM.

Posted 6/4/12 10:52 AM
 

Jennifer
Happy

Member since 5/05

4230 total posts

Name:
.

Re: [elephant in the room]

Completely crazy and so wrong! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/4/12 10:53 AM
 

MoralRelativity
LIF Zygote

Member since 6/12

19 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

I'm not defending her. the situation 'is what it is'. i dont see things as black and white as some of the regulars on this website ...i really dont even care about the outcome of this case....the newspapers are doing just as much damage to this 16 yr old kid as she has done....and to all of you who lack comprehension skills im not trying to justify her behavior, but rather, trying to criticize the media's.....WTF is with printing this kids name everywhere.....im surprised they havent put up a picture

Posted 6/4/12 10:54 AM
 

DiamondGirl
You are my I love you

Member since 7/09

18802 total posts

Name:
DiamondMama

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

Let me put everyone onto this whole situation for a minute or two. I've known Erin Sayar for several years and it was very clear, to me at least, that she was suffering from post partum depression almost immediately after the birth of her daughter. She was a wonderful teacher through 2005-2006 when I had her English class- She struck me as an intelligent young woman with a head on her shoulders and as a teacher that cared both about the students and the literature. She was bright, funny, engaging, and had a girl next door kind of look to her----never sexy, but definitely pretty and undeniably cute.She was NEVER inappropriate with me in the classroom-although I would NOT have minded nor have blown it up to the entire world--- I fell out of touch with her after my graduation in 2007 but found her on FB a year or two later and we began chatting as we always had a good relationship. I was SHOCKED to see/hear just how much her demeanor, appearance, and outlook had changed in just 2-3 short years. She began covering herself in these HORRENDOUS tattoos and all of a sudden had this 'im hot shit' attitude (where was it when you were actually good looking a couple years back???) Anyway I'm really not trying to put this woman on blast on this gossipy-yenta site--especially a woman that was a great teacher and a kind person throughout my ENTIRE experience with her. But I do have to concur with others here that I reallllllly think her pregnancy hit her hard and that maybe it had some effects on her family/work/relationships. These pictures of her in the Daily News are just awful---she looks sky high on Xanax/Valium/Klonopin or something similar---and it is just awful how she's playing up for the cameras. WHETHER OR NOT SHE GETS CONVICTED, SHE WILL FOREVER HAVE THESE CHARGES ON HER RECORD AND ON HER REPUTATION. A far cry from the kind, cute, intelligent woman i knew in 2006...I feel very bad for her. I really think that post-partum depression, her naive use of prescription drugs, and the 'easy-going, lax a daisy' atmosphere ofr Madison all contributed to this. But poor judgement does not always constitute a bad person---I have my own long list of things I shouldnt have done-----but nothing up on the internet for the world to laugh at and mock.....lol.....peace.....and good luck miss sayar.....you were a nice lady....stop taking xanax



Working in education is a huge responsibility. You are not only teaching math or science, you are teaching CHILDREN life skills. She was responsible, in part, for the well being of that student. She abused him. No one is denying that she clearly has mental instability/issues but that is not a pass to abuse a child.

Posted 6/4/12 10:55 AM
 

maymama
my little loves

Member since 8/08

18453 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

If she prepared for those god-awful pictures than i can only imagine what she looks like when she rolls out of bed and reaches for the pill bottle several feet away on the dresser.... lol



interesting comment from someone who "is really not trying to put this woman on blast on this gossipy-yenta site--especially a woman that was a great teacher and a kind person throughout my ENTIRE experience with her."

you are enjoying our yenta ways, are you? stick around, make some friends. Chat Icon

Posted 6/4/12 10:57 AM
 

MoralRelativity
LIF Zygote

Member since 6/12

19 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

lol yeah i guess you got me on that one.

Posted 6/4/12 10:58 AM
 

MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!

Member since 7/06

12020 total posts

Name:
MJ

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

lol yeah i guess you got me on that one.




It's like a moth to the flame...you can't blame yourself for getting sucked in!

Posted 6/4/12 11:00 AM
 

Celt
~~~~~~~~~~

Member since 4/08

7758 total posts

Name:
colette

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

I'm not defending her. the situation 'is what it is'. i dont see things as black and white as some of the regulars on this website ...i really dont even care about the outcome of this case....the newspapers are doing just as much damage to this 16 yr old kid as she has done....and to all of you who lack comprehension skills im not trying to justify her behavior, but rather, trying to criticize the media's.....WTF is with printing this kids name everywhere.....im surprised they havent put up a picture



The kid (and his parents) are well aware his name would be everywhere once they filed a $10M civil suit. I'm sure they were well-prepared for the fallout, and $10M will buy a lot of therapy :D
It's more disgraceful that Ms. Sayar (and her attorney husband) are parading their 3 yo in front of photogs and reporters, in an effort to garner sympathy/goodwill.

Posted 6/4/12 11:07 AM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: [elephant in the room]

sayar=sandusky

both used their trusted positions in life to prey and rape boys.

Posted 6/4/12 11:20 AM
 

brownie
Baby #1 is here!

Member since 11/08

13903 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

Let me put everyone onto this whole situation for a minute or two. I've known Erin Sayar for several years and it was very clear, to me at least, that she was suffering from post partum depression almost immediately after the birth of her daughter. She was a wonderful teacher through 2005-2006 when I had her English class- She struck me as an intelligent young woman with a head on her shoulders and as a teacher that cared both about the students and the literature. She was bright, funny, engaging, and had a girl next door kind of look to her----never sexy, but definitely pretty and undeniably cute.She was NEVER inappropriate with me in the classroom-although I would NOT have minded nor have blown it up to the entire world--- I fell out of touch with her after my graduation in 2007 but found her on FB a year or two later and we began chatting as we always had a good relationship. I was SHOCKED to see/hear just how much her demeanor, appearance, and outlook had changed in just 2-3 short years. She began covering herself in these HORRENDOUS tattoos and all of a sudden had this 'im hot shit' attitude (where was it when you were actually good looking a couple years back???) Anyway I'm really not trying to put this woman on blast on this gossipy-yenta site--especially a woman that was a great teacher and a kind person throughout my ENTIRE experience with her. But I do have to concur with others here that I reallllllly think her pregnancy hit her hard and that maybe it had some effects on her family/work/relationships. These pictures of her in the Daily News are just awful---she looks sky high on Xanax/Valium/Klonopin or something similar---and it is just awful how she's playing up for the cameras. WHETHER OR NOT SHE GETS CONVICTED, SHE WILL FOREVER HAVE THESE CHARGES ON HER RECORD AND ON HER REPUTATION. A far cry from the kind, cute, intelligent woman i knew in 2006...I feel very bad for her. I really think that post-partum depression, her naive use of prescription drugs, and the 'easy-going, lax a daisy' atmosphere ofr Madison all contributed to this. But poor judgement does not always constitute a bad person---I have my own long list of things I shouldnt have done-----but nothing up on the internet for the world to laugh at and mock.....lol.....peace.....and good luck miss sayar.....you were a nice lady....stop taking xanax



Ted Bundy was super nice too. Also intelligent and good-looking (supposedly). Just sayin.

Posted 6/4/12 11:21 AM
 

TessMike214
Gabriella Aubrey born 3/26!

Member since 5/10

2440 total posts

Name:
Tess

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by Bearcat


Ew! She's just soaking it all in. Like a dirty whoresponge.



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Message edited 6/4/2012 11:38:05 AM.

Posted 6/4/12 11:34 AM
 

EatingMyVeggies

Member since 1/12

6667 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

I'm trying to find out why I still sort of feel for her. I wonder if it's because she's from here. Normally I'm very tough when it comes to these things so I'm surprised by myself and my reaction.

Posted 6/4/12 11:38 AM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by cncforever

I'm trying to find out why I still sort of feel for her. I wonder if it's because she's from here. Normally I'm very tough when it comes to these things so I'm surprised by myself and my reaction.



I kind of do too, I think it's because it was well documented here that something kind of snapped in her after she had her baby. I feel like she's maybe not a bad person just really screwed up and under the influence. It can make you do crazy things that are not in your nature.

However, all of these flaunting pictures kind of make me think twice. They either make me think she's a sick individual (as in evil), or a sick individual (as in really crazy out of her mind).

it doesn't make it forgiveable.


If i were accused of something like that (heaven forbid), I would not be flaunting myself around. I'd either stay low key because I can tell you I would not be grinning up a storm, or I'd be making serious statements about my innocence, not acting crazy

Posted 6/4/12 11:51 AM
 

greenybeans
:)

Member since 8/06

6435 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by JenniferEver

Posted by cncforever

I'm trying to find out why I still sort of feel for her. I wonder if it's because she's from here. Normally I'm very tough when it comes to these things so I'm surprised by myself and my reaction.



I kind of do too, I think it's because it was well documented here that something kind of snapped in her after she had her baby. I feel like she's maybe not a bad person just really screwed up and under the influence. It can make you do crazy things that are not in your nature.

However, all of these flaunting pictures kind of make me think twice. They either make me think she's a sick individual (as in evil), or a sick individual (as in really crazy out of her mind).

it doesn't make it forgiveable.


If i were accused of something like that (heaven forbid), I would not be flaunting myself around. I'd either stay low key because I can tell you I would not be grinning up a storm, or I'd be making serious statements about my innocence, not acting crazy




I feel a little bad for her as well. Probably because I went through PPD, and I did a few nutty things myself. (nothing like this of course) I know it alters your mind though.

On the other hand, I'm a mother. If it was my boy and a teacher was sleeping with him, and giving him drugs, I would f'n kill her ass. Plus, she is leaving behind her own poor little girl for this.

She's obviously sick. Any 30+ or even 20+ woman wouldn't ever consider having sex with a 16 year old. She's his teacher, how could she look at him like that? I think it's inappropriate when women tell me my brother is hot, and he's 19.

I just can't reconcile it in my mind. Throwing away your family, even if the marriage isn't perfect. She doesn't even look sorry. It's sad.

Posted 6/4/12 12:10 PM
 

Ayne11
Yep

Member since 1/09

18021 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by cncforever

I'm trying to find out why I still sort of feel for her. I wonder if it's because she's from here. Normally I'm very tough when it comes to these things so I'm surprised by myself and my reaction.



I feel sorry for her daughter. That poor sweet girl will always be the daughter of this woman. Can you imagine growing up & reading about what your mother did?!? Or having this stigma attached to you for the rest of your life? she didnt ssk for any of this She's the only victim in this whole clusterf*ck as far as I'm concerned.

Posted 6/4/12 12:13 PM
 

Goldi0218
My miracles!

Member since 12/05

23902 total posts

Name:
Leslie

Re: [elephant in the room]

Even if she cops a plea and it deals with the welfare of a minor - sexual or not - she won't be in a classroom. I think she will cop a plea. The evidence against her is too damning and she'd get convicted.

Posted 6/4/12 12:17 PM
 

teachermom
LIF Adolescent

Member since 8/11

843 total posts

Name:

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by MoralRelativity

I'm not defending her. the situation 'is what it is'. i dont see things as black and white as some of the regulars on this website ...i really dont even care about the outcome of this case....the newspapers are doing just as much damage to this 16 yr old kid as she has done....and to all of you who lack comprehension skills im not trying to justify her behavior, but rather, trying to criticize the media's.....WTF is with printing this kids name everywhere.....im surprised they havent put up a picture



I'm suprised that the boy's name is out too. That doesn't seem fair at all, he's a minor

Posted 6/4/12 12:18 PM
 

Celt
~~~~~~~~~~

Member since 4/08

7758 total posts

Name:
colette

Re: [elephant in the room]

Posted by Ayne11

Posted by cncforever

I'm trying to find out why I still sort of feel for her. I wonder if it's because she's from here. Normally I'm very tough when it comes to these things so I'm surprised by myself and my reaction.



I feel sorry for her daughter. That poor sweet girl will always be the daughter of this woman. Can you imagine growing up & reading about what your mother did?!? Or having this stigma attached to you for the rest of your life? she didnt ssk for any of this She's the only victim in this whole clusterf*ck as far as I'm concerned.



Agree.
I don't think ppd or a mental snap give you carte blanche for abhorrent behavior.
And I think I am a pretty compassionate person. I have a lot of empathy for the lowlifes and the f*ckups of the world. Lots.
Circumstances can make otherwise delightful people do sh*tty things - to themselves and others.
But take out your dementia on a KID, and all bets are off, to me.
I think I am particularly stony regarding this woman, because, way back in 2010 when she seemed to have some kind of SERIOUS break with reality, any and all inquiries were met with her typical boorish, arrogant replies. And you know what, that's fine. I've certainly embarrassed myself along the way and a few times are painful even now in my memory. But a normal person might privately take that event to heart and say "Holy sh*t what am I doing? I need help". Not our delightful snickers. She lashed out at everyone, convinced herself she was the victim of some huge conspiracy, and took not one bloody moment to say "hmmm, maybe it's me." I can only imagine her friends and family IRL got the same bs if they tried to help.
And this is a woman with both a reason to get well, and access to resources she could have grabbed with both hands. So nope, no compassion here for her. Or her douchey DH frankly. I hope her little girl never knows *anything* about it, that's all.
Her little PR charm offensive might work in the courtroom but the court of public opinion likely will not be as indulgent. Chat Icon

Posted 6/4/12 12:23 PM
 
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