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hotsauce345
my love, my life, my son
Member since 1/09 4169 total posts
Name:
Melody
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
anyway, getting back to the OP...to touch base on the idea that one thing leads to the next: Black people didn't have rights either at one point. They were segregated, enslaved, murdered, curfewed, crucified, hung. You couldn't even legally marry interracially with a black person in certain states before 1967 (not so long ago!!) times have changed...we now have a black president. So, should we not have changed those laws for fear of what they would lead to next? we'd still be living in a time where black people were lynched if that were the case. As we evolve as people we become more aware...laws should reflect that we have evolved as a people (within reason...and thats where it gets a little unclear...because reason is different for everyone). And NO that does NOT mean that a person can marry their pet goat next (I actually find this analogy disturbing and quite disrespectful and condescending to both gays and polygamists)...because as someone previously said...the goat cannot express consent.
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Posted 5/1/12 9:27 PM  |
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
I have seen comparisons made between gay marriage and bestiality, as if we allow gay marriage, then a whole sexually deviant anarchy will erupt and everyone is going to marry and screw horses and 500 spouses..... Seriously????
I feel that it is ridiculous to even put gay marriage in the category of devious behavior in this day and age.
There was a time when interracial marriages were put In The same category. You would have thought people would have learned a thing or 2 since then.
I am not saying I am against polygamy, but it is viewed as devious and now presented as the direction we may go in just because we are allowing TWO consenting adults to marry each other??? If we allow two, then it opens up the Door for multiple spouses? It just is the most warped logic ever!
Message edited 5/1/2012 9:29:19 PM.
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| Posted 5/1/12 9:28 PM |
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Stacey1403
Where it all began....
Member since 5/05 24065 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
The only marriage I am concerned with is my own! What other consenting adults do is their business not mine! 
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| Posted 5/1/12 9:36 PM |
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hotsauce345
my love, my life, my son
Member since 1/09 4169 total posts
Name:
Melody
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by Porrruss
I guess I support gay marriage but not polygamy because people who are gay are born gay. That is who they are, they didn't choose to be attracted to the same sex. Therefore to not allow them to marry simply because of who they are is discrimination.
Polygamy is a conscience choice.
I don't know what thats 100% true. (re: being born that way)
My mother was married to my father...she genuinely loved him. she was IN LOVE with him...but she moved on to be gay.
this could mean a few things...it could mean maybe she ALWAYS had gay tendencies...or it could mean that gender doesn't play so much of a role in her matters of the heart...but she just so happens to be more attracted to women at the moment (and for the past 25+ years)
then you have my male cousin...who pretty much came out of the womb wanting to play with barbie dolls. We all knew he was gay...even before he did.
I think some are born that way, and some learn it, sometimes it develops over time and some choose it.
Then you have those who go with the same sex because they are curious or because it's trendy (it DOES happen)
either way...wether born that way...or its an "acquired taste" I think it just comes down to an issue of equality. We as a society need to stop picking and choosing whose lifestyle we agree with enough to give them equal rights and benefits and which we don't. As long as they aren't hurting anyone...they deserve equality.
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| Posted 5/1/12 9:39 PM |
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shadows
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 4694 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by Otherme
Posted by bookworm
I guess I'm less comfortable with it because, well, it's kind of anti-woman. That's the part that bothers me, but live and let live I suppose.
that's pretty much how i feel
So i don't see how supporting gay marriage means that you should automatically support polygamy
I agree with this. I don't like feeling like women are a man's "pets" which is how polygamy makes me feel  Gay marriage - honestly, i'm pretty indifferent.
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| Posted 5/1/12 9:42 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by havinababy
I read an article discussing the legalities of changing the definition of marriage and how that opens it up for further interpretation, polygamy as an example. I found it interesting. If you do not, don't post.
So if we change the definition of marriage, it opens it up to further interpretation? Change it from which point?
When it was changed from polygamy to monogamy in to ensure the Catholic church didn't have to divide its property & ensured that inheritance laws prevailed?
When we changed the definition in 1860s to include anti-miscegenation laws to ensure no mixing of races? Or was it when we changed it back because those laws were repealed 45 years ago?
Or maybe the misinterpretation in 1986, when the Defense of Marriage Act changed he definition of marriage as the legal union of one man and one woman?
Or maybe this past February when the court ruled DOMA violates the right to equal protection of the law under the Fifth Amendment to the United States Constitution?
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| Posted 5/1/12 10:39 PM |
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by havinababy
I read an article discussing the legalities of changing the definition of marriage and how that opens it up for further interpretation, polygamy as an example. I found it interesting. If you do not, don't post.
So if we change the definition of marriage, it opens it up to further interpretation? Change it from which point?
When it was changed from polygamy to monogamy in to ensure the Catholic church didn't have to divide its property & ensured that inheritance laws prevailed?
When we changed the definition in 1860s to include anti-miscegenation laws to ensure no mixing of races? Or was it when we changed it back because those laws were repealed 45 years ago?
Or maybe the misinterpretation in 1986, when the Defense of Marriage Act changed he definition of marriage as the legal union of one man and one woman?
Or maybe this past February when the court ruled DOMA violates the right to equal protection of the law under the Fifth Amendment to the United States Constitution?
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| Posted 5/1/12 11:34 PM |
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HeyJude
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/07 820 total posts
Name:
p
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by havinababy
I read an article discussing the legalities of changing the definition of marriage and how that opens it up for further interpretation, polygamy as an example. I found it interesting. If you do not, don't post.
So if we change the definition of marriage, it opens it up to further interpretation? Change it from which point?
When it was changed from polygamy to monogamy in to ensure the Catholic church didn't have to divide its property & ensured that inheritance laws prevailed?
When we changed the definition in 1860s to include anti-miscegenation laws to ensure no mixing of races? Or was it when we changed it back because those laws were repealed 45 years ago?
Or maybe the misinterpretation in 1986, when the Defense of Marriage Act changed he definition of marriage as the legal union of one man and one woman?
Or maybe this past February when the court ruled DOMA violates the right to equal protection of the law under the Fifth Amendment to the United States Constitution?
Sure-why not? Change it from the point it is at now. Why are polygamists discriminated against? Polygamy is so taboo in society, as homosexuality used to be. Why should the law tell me how many people I can be married to at one time? If marriage is a contract, why can't it be a contract between more than 2 people?
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| Posted 5/2/12 6:39 AM |
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teachermom
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/11 843 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by DumpsterBaby
I support gay marriage but not polygamy, and I do not think they can be equated in the same way. 2 people is 2 people whether its men, women or whatever.
Polygamy is marriage to multiple partners, and that is a lifestyle I don't agree with so much as I don't necessarily like it. I'm kinda of ambivalent about polygamist marriages. They don't really affect me.
I don't have the capacity to love multiple people the way I love my husband, nor would I want to. To me, polygamy is an excuse to legalize adultery. You are not born a polygamist, tha IS a choice. Homosexuality is NOT a choice.
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| Posted 5/2/12 7:05 AM |
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TheDivineMrsM
2 girls 4 me!
Member since 8/08 7878 total posts
Name:
Mama mama mama....
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by GoldenRod
I'm pro "consenting adults" marriage. As long as all parties involved are consenting adults, I have no problem with it. The age of consent can vary by state, the gender doesn't matter, and the number of individuals doesn't matter to me.... as long as all parties, both existing and incoming, know all of the details, and consent to the arrangement.
One guy having two families on opposite sides of the country who don't know about each other is not good. If everyone consents, it doesn't affect my marriage, or my life, so I really don't care.
Exactly. I don't want to be told who I can marry, and will respect the choices of other adults. DH's uncles have been together for 20+ years, and were finally allowed to get married. We were thrilled for them. In the words of Chris Rock, "Gay people should have just as much right to be as miserable as everybody else!" LOL.
Polygamy is a stickier one for me, but I'm still supportive as long as all parties are ADULTS. A 15 year-old being coerced/brainwashed and married off in a plural marriage IMO is totally different than a 25 year-old consciously choosing a lifestyle.
Message edited 5/2/2012 8:49:23 AM.
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| Posted 5/2/12 8:44 AM |
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DSLaff
Team One of Each
Member since 10/09 2150 total posts
Name:
Dana
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
do whatever the hell you want , this is AMERICA just dont do something to waste my tax money
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| Posted 5/2/12 8:56 AM |
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sj-girl
Happy Family of 4
Member since 5/08 5654 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by GoldenRod
I'm pro "consenting adults" marriage. As long as all parties involved are consenting adults, I have no problem with it. The age of consent can vary by state, the gender doesn't matter, and the number of individuals doesn't matter to me.... as long as all parties, both existing and incoming, know all of the details, and consent to the arrangement.
One guy having two families on opposite sides of the country who don't know about each other is not good. If everyone consents, it doesn't affect my marriage, or my life, so I really don't care.
DW also agrees with this. We've talked about it after watching Sister Wives. It's not for us, but we definitely think it's OK.
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| Posted 5/2/12 9:19 AM |
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Daisy32
Mommy
Member since 2/08 8081 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
I do support gay marriage however I do NOT support polygamy.
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| Posted 5/2/12 9:35 AM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by MrsMeloyellow
Posted by Porrruss
I guess I support gay marriage but not polygamy because people who are gay are born gay. That is who they are, they didn't choose to be attracted to the same sex. Therefore to not allow them to marry simply because of who they are is discrimination.
Polygamy is a conscience choice.
I don't know what thats 100% true. (re: being born that way)
My mother was married to my father...she genuinely loved him. she was IN LOVE with him...but she moved on to be gay.
this could mean a few things...it could mean maybe she ALWAYS had gay tendencies...or it could mean that gender doesn't play so much of a role in her matters of the heart...but she just so happens to be more attracted to women at the moment (and for the past 25+ years)
then you have my male cousin...who pretty much came out of the womb wanting to play with barbie dolls. We all knew he was gay...even before he did.
I think some are born that way, and some learn it, sometimes it develops over time and some choose it.
Then you have those who go with the same sex because they are curious or because it's trendy (it DOES happen)
either way...wether born that way...or its an "acquired taste" I think it just comes down to an issue of equality. We as a society need to stop picking and choosing whose lifestyle we agree with enough to give them equal rights and benefits and which we don't. As long as they aren't hurting anyone...they deserve equality.
Just because someone changes teams in the middle of life doesn't mean it wasn't inherently in them. I have two friends who married men. They decided they were not happy and couldn't figure out why. Turns out they were attracted to women all along. They still love their husbands and want to remain in their lives but pressure from society steers us sometimes.
There is not a doubt in my mind that it's biological. It's not a choice. I don't think it's a learned trait or environmental. I do think there is a genetic link as well.
Some people might experiment but know who they are deep down. Repression also happens in late bloomers.
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| Posted 5/2/12 9:50 AM |
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mamabear
LIF Adult
Member since 3/08 4539 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
I support gay marriage for equality reasons. I believe you can't help you fall in love with. Who you want to share a life with. Who you are attracted to. I don't think anyone is hurt in the process.
I don't support polygamy (in the traditional sense) for equality reasons. I believe, from what I have seen, that most commonly it is male-dominated. It is one husband and many wives. I don't know/believe that the women who usually end up in such positions actually want to be in those positions, or if it is how they are brought up and feel forced into it. So, I think the women in those relationships may be hurt. I think the children may be hurt because if the guy has multiple children with each woman, does he have a hard time supporting them all equally? Just like I wouldn't support any one person have more kids than they can handle/afford, I think this type of situation can lead to that. I also don't think it is equal in that marriage is two people, and benefits split between them. If it is more than two people, how can they have equal benefits, without it hurting others or putting an extra burden on others.
While I don't morally support open relationships, if all parties are genuinely happy and that is what they desire, then that is their business.
Message edited 5/2/2012 10:33:26 AM.
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| Posted 5/2/12 10:32 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by havinababy
Change it from the point it is at now. Why are polygamists discriminated against? Polygamy is so taboo in society, as homosexuality used to be. Why should the law tell me how many people I can be married to at one time? If marriage is a contract, why can't it be a contract between more than 2 people?
I'm assuming they're discriminated against because while we have separation of church & state, we do not truly have it.
My only issue is how to deal with the sticky financial issues that pop up - if a spouse dies, do we have to pay # of spousal benefits? How many people on a health insurance plan, etc?
I know my friend who works for a government agency & investigated a religious community in NY where couples were married in their religion (but not through the State because they don't recognize State law & only believe in the religious joining of a man & woman), maintained a home, have 10+ children & the woman/mother collects welfare for each child. The male brings home his paycheck, which doesn't get affected by living with a "single mom" & her kids. Oh & the male/dad gets credit for section 8 housing. This is where I have an issue with our system.
If you can support yourself, your wife/wives & your family go for it.
Message edited 5/2/2012 11:40:25 AM.
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| Posted 5/2/12 11:39 AM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by nrthshgrl
My only issue is how to deal with the sticky financial issues that pop up - if a spouse dies, do we have to pay # of spousal benefits? How many people on a health insurance plan, etc?
The Duggars would have 21 people on their Family plan if they had typical insurance, and they would pay the exact same amount as a person with only 1 child.
If the parents die or are injured, all kids under 18 get SS benefits.
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| Posted 5/2/12 11:52 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by GoldenRod
Posted by nrthshgrl
My only issue is how to deal with the sticky financial issues that pop up - if a spouse dies, do we have to pay # of spousal benefits? How many people on a health insurance plan, etc?
The Duggars would have 21 people on their Family plan if they had typical insurance, and they would pay the exact same amount as a person with only 1 child.
If the parents die or are injured, all kids under 18 get SS benefits.
I'm talking about the spousal benefits not the children's benefits. Do they all get social security? For example, if I marry & have never worked a day in my life, I am not entitled to social security benefits on my own. If I marry, I can collect based on my husband's social security earning, no? Does that mean that each spouse collects? Do they get to deduct each spouse as a dependent off their state & federal taxes? Do they all file as one? Those are things I'd need to see worked out.
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| Posted 5/2/12 12:25 PM |
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Erica
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 11767 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
I'm a little embarrassed that I remember this thread from 8 years ago.
(page 3 starts talking about polygamy)
It's interesting to see the change of opinion on LIW/LIF over the years.
Message edited 5/2/2012 12:45:18 PM.
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| Posted 5/2/12 12:44 PM |
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BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre
Member since 5/05 9320 total posts
Name:
Mrs. B
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
I can't believe how many people are atill against gay marriage  how sad
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| Posted 5/2/12 12:48 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Totally random comment BUT Sci-Fi watchers will understand this:
I watched Caprica and had no issues.
Sister Clarice Willow
Enough said.
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| Posted 5/2/12 3:07 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by BriBri2u
I can't believe how many people are atill against gay marriage how sad
Why? It is their belief and opinion. As long as they aren't going out murdering innocent children because they believe them to be gay, then they should have the right to whatever they believe.
We may all have to conform to a public norm that fits whatever sway is currently popular but in our home and personal lives (or an anon poll) we should be ok with being honest.
Always be honest with yourself.
Meh. I think people shouldn't be afraid to say they disagree with something.
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| Posted 5/2/12 3:10 PM |
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newbie00
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 1191 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by GoldenRod
I'm pro "consenting adults" marriage. As long as all parties involved are consenting adults, I have no problem with it. The age of consent can vary by state, the gender doesn't matter, and the number of individuals doesn't matter to me.... as long as all parties, both existing and incoming, know all of the details, and consent to the arrangement.
One guy having two families on opposite sides of the country who don't know about each other is not good. If everyone consents, it doesn't affect my marriage, or my life, so I really don't care.
DW also agrees with this. We've talked about it after watching Sister Wives. It's not for us, but we definitely think it's OK.
I agree....it doesn,t affect my relationship so who am I to dictate what others can do in theirs
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| Posted 5/2/12 7:57 PM |
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Ltdentway99
LIF Adult
Member since 9/06 1752 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Ironically, people who say homosexuality is against the bible could technically be OK with polygamy because all of the biblical stories have polygamists. If one woman couldn't get pregnant, the guy got a second wife.
IMO, I don't care either way about gay marriage. I don't feel that it affects me. For polygamy, even though it doesn't affect me, I don't like it. When I see polygamists on TV I feel sorry for the women. I really feel like they are subordinates to their husbands. The sisterwives defend it, though, so I who am I to judge?
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| Posted 5/2/12 8:49 PM |
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emilylives
biking
Member since 12/09 2163 total posts
Name:
Emily
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Re: If you support gay marriage, do you support polygamy?
Posted by Xelindrya
Posted by BriBri2u
I can't believe how many people are atill against gay marriage how sad
Why? It is their belief and opinion. As long as they aren't going out murdering innocent children because they believe them to be gay, then they should have the right to whatever they believe.
We may all have to conform to a public norm that fits whatever sway is currently popular but in our home and personal lives (or an anon poll) we should be ok with being honest.
Always be honest with yourself.
Meh. I think people shouldn't be afraid to say they disagree with something.
I don't think people should be afraid to disagree, but that doesn't mean I don't feel sad that so many people are still against gay marriage. If you heard a large percentage of people were against interracial marriage, would it make you sad? It's not to say they're not entitled to their opinion, but the question was about supporting the legalization of it, not personal and/or religious beliefs about it. I think it's totally reasonable to express sadness that so many people are against extending what I consider to be a basic human right to the entire US population.
Message edited 5/3/2012 1:19:08 AM.
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| Posted 5/3/12 1:17 AM |
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