Tales of a TTCer

It’s 4:38am. I jump out of bed. I have to pee. Wait, I was just peeing. Oh no, check the bed. Phew, ok it was just a dream. DH asks what’s wrong. Nothing, I have to pee. This is the 2nd time this week I’ve gotten up to pee in the middle of the night. Hmmm, maybe it’s a symptom. I never pee in the middle of the night.

I walk with one eye shut to the bathroom. As I pass the hall closet where my HPTs reside (out of sight, out of mind my arse) I figure, hey, someone else on LIF has tested at 4:30am also so why not.

I grab my trusty pee cup and begin peeing. I remove the cup and realize I didn’t pee enough in it. I need at least half a cup to be sure there’s enough “good pee” in there for the test to pick up the hormone. As I go to put the cup back in place to collect more pee, whoops, all over my hand.

When I’m sure I have enough I remove the cup, only to spill half of it on the floor. Great! Nothing like cleaning up pee on the floor at 4:30 in the morning when you’re half asleep and trying not to wake up too much. I drop my 5 drops of pee into the tester and proceed to try to keep my eyes off of the test while I clean up the pee on the floor and wash up. So this is what it will feel like to change diapers in the middle of the night half asleep. Yeah, maybe DH should be on night duty.

Ok, look at the test. One line. The darn control line. I hate that line. Maybe there’s a faint test line. Turn on the brighter light so I can try to find some glimmer of a faint line. Nothing. I turn the test to every angle possible, hold it to the light…nothing. I can’t deny it any longer. I toss the test in the garbage and curse life out. I hope my future kid knows how much trouble I’ve gone through. And final note to self: don’t ever test again in the middle of the night.

Re: Tales of a TTCer

Aw Jen, I'm sorry! I can't help but laugh - you're so descriptive and I could just see the whole thing happening!

Re: Tales of a TTCer

hahahahahaha this truly made me laugh I did the same thing and surely enough instead of testing I spilled all my pee and then slipped on it bare butt. Knocking over our trash can. DH comes running in and starts laughing at me at 3 am soaked in pee. But I will send you tons of