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Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A

Member since 7/05

32475 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Nope, I wouldn't. I'm too traditional. It's too big of a financial committment to do before the legal committment of marriage.

I wish you the best of luck though!Chat Icon

Posted 5/8/09 11:02 AM
 
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skip123
Trying...

Member since 8/06

2759 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

We were engaged....we closed about 7 months prior to the wedding....It was fine for us, the only thing is I have yet to change my name on anything related to the house yet..but it was nice because the day of our wedding we went back there after the church and took pics there...

Posted 5/8/09 12:23 PM
 

beaviss80
:)

Member since 8/06

1552 total posts

Name:
michelle

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

we did it, and now married almost 3 years and now onto our second house. go for it!!! best of luck!

Posted 5/8/09 12:29 PM
 

ave1024
I Took The Wrong Road

Member since 12/07

6153 total posts

Name:
That Led To The Wrong Tendencies

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

I would not purchase a house before marriage unless the marriage date was already set and was 2-3 months away. Way too much of a commitment otherwise.

If you want to live with him, I would just rent a place together.

Message edited 5/8/2009 12:31:19 PM.

Posted 5/8/09 12:30 PM
 

lovemy2boys
LIF Adult

Member since 10/07

3915 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

no I wouldn't after 2 years. DH and I at the time were together 5 yrs then bought something together. I would wait for engagement

Posted 5/8/09 1:13 PM
 

lullabella
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

2246 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Personally I wouldnt but a home before I was engaged. It gets complicated if it doesnt work out.

Posted 5/8/09 1:16 PM
 

CoachC
LIF Infant

Member since 8/08

275 total posts

Name:
Kerri

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Posted by PotofLuck06

I didn't, but DH's best friend and his GF are house hunting. They are in their late 20s./close to 30. She just got tenured with teaching and he works in IT - they stated they do not want to waste their money in renting and currently both live with their families.

A lot of people will say it's a bad idea, but if the two of you are ready for the responsibility and can afford it, I say go ahead, but make sure that the house is signed by equal parties, so you each own half incase anything happens down the road.

Good luck!



I think we're friends with the same people. Haha.

But to answer the OP, I would have bought a house before being married/engaged if I had thought about it more. It's actually a great idea if you can do it, because once you get engaged all our money starts going towards your wedding - if you're paying for it, and then the house has to wait. I say it's a great idea if you know your relationship is solid and heading towards marriage.

Posted 5/8/09 2:11 PM
 

TheDivineMrsM
2 girls 4 me!

Member since 8/08

7878 total posts

Name:
Mama mama mama....

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Posted by KevinNKristin8-15-08

We bought our house when we were engaged (about 7 months before the wedding). I really don't think it matters when you buy a house..it has nothing to do with being engaged/married! We were happy that we bought it before we got married so we had somewhere to go after the wedding! lol and it was less stressful that way!!!!



ITA - we did the exact same thing. We were renting for awhile, were able to save a downpayment, and bought a house seven months before the wedding. It actually made registering easier. I knew what size plates my dishwasher could hold, how much space I had for small appliances, and we were able to put our wedding money towards home improvements. It was great to not have to deal with moving right after the wedding. We also had a few months "practice" of sharing expenses, money, and cc's, so the financial transition into marriage was very easy.

Message edited 5/8/2009 2:19:53 PM.

Posted 5/8/09 2:18 PM
 

joenick
Us

Member since 6/06

9370 total posts

Name:
Valerie...aka...Do Me A Favor?

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

We bought our house when we were engaged.

We closed in January 1998 and were married in April of that same year.

Message edited 5/8/2009 3:36:26 PM.

Posted 5/8/09 3:36 PM
 

KarissaD
LIF Toddler

Member since 5/07

489 total posts

Name:
Karissa

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

So many diff opinions! We probaby are...we'll see!!! Hope it works out for me...I feel 100% for it!! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/11/09 9:54 PM
 

MsSissy
xoxoxo

Member since 3/07

39159 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

We started talking about moving in together and getting married.
So we bought a house instead of an engagement ring. We were married 18 months after we moved inChat Icon

Good Luck to youChat Icon

Posted 5/11/09 10:17 PM
 

rojerono
Happiest.

Member since 8/06

13803 total posts

Name:
Jeannie

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Rob and I were together for almost 8 years and had 2 kids before we bought a house. We had a wedding a year later. We would not have had a 'wedding' if we hadn't bought the house first.. we couldn't justify the expense.

Posted 5/12/09 6:35 AM
 

Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)

Member since 6/06

3543 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

I think that is fine... this is not 1915 ya know... :)we lived to gether then got the house ( engaged in the proccess) then married... :) Find your house you all ready found your man

Posted 5/12/09 7:29 AM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

As long as my name is also on the deed, I'd have no problems with it if I were contributing to it.

Posted 5/12/09 10:42 AM
 

Marbo
LOVE

Member since 7/08

2374 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

We did when we were engaged. At the time we were already together for 6 years. We bought the house about 1 year before the wedding. We did not move into it though until we got married...it needed a lot of work and still does!

Posted 5/12/09 2:25 PM
 

LAMGAJ28
.

Member since 10/05

6039 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Hey Karissa !!!Chat Icon Chat Icon
It's soo good to see you back and happy. I saw the pictures on your album and you make such a cute couple. I remember when you started dating him and I'm soo happy for you that you are together and going strong. Chat Icon
I think the answer is different for everyone. What may work for someone may not work for the other person. It is a big responsibility but if you are both ready for it and are able to afford it, then go for it. Now it's the best time ever to invest. I couldn't be happier for you. Glad to hear that all is going well and that you are soo happy. Chat Icon

Posted 5/12/09 3:01 PM
 

theburbshereicome
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/08

885 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

I'm all for living together before marriage. *applause* for test runs.

Buying property with someone your not married to, from a legal standpoint, I"M SCREAMING NOOOOOOOOOOO. *DANGER* DANGER*
If god forbid, you were to have to sell a house in this economy, it was be disastereous, if god forbid you had to sell a house in this economy with an ex BF, it would be a legal nightmare disaster.

Hate to be debbie downer on this one, but I see it all the time here. Please if you ARE going to sign anything, have a lawyer look over it. Have something drawn up to protect yourself if things do not work out.

Posted 5/12/09 3:26 PM
 

LINewbie
Tigger the the Rescue!

Member since 8/08

5647 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

No way would I ever do it. Way way too risky.

Posted 5/12/09 5:43 PM
 

KimberlyScott
Graceyn=My World <3

Member since 10/08

4173 total posts

Name:
Kimberly

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

I agree with the OP's in saying that you don't have to be married in order to by a house together. Do it if that's what makes you happy.

Definatley make sure your name is on it if you are contributing towards the DP or the mortgage.

In case (god forbid) you break up....what happens in divorce? He buys you out or vice versa.

I happen to love the idea. Just consider the cost of an upcoming wedding into your budget now that you have a mortgage payment but, if I remember correctly .....you already did that!

Good Luck Chat Icon

Posted 5/12/09 7:03 PM
 

itkocak

Member since 7/07

7639 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Message edited 11/28/2011 9:14:15 PM.

Posted 5/12/09 7:31 PM
 

MommyofG
just the girls

Member since 5/05

9461 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Hi and I am so happy for you!!!

We did! we purchased a house 2 years before we got engaged. when you know you just know!
go for it and the market is great right now too!!!!!!!

good luck!

edited to say just make sure both names are on title and mortgage so that in the event something goes wrong its done 50/50 no big deal!
life is about chances, you may not be here tomorrow, I say live in the moment but thinking it through as well to cover yourself.

Message edited 5/14/2009 10:39:45 AM.

Posted 5/14/09 10:37 AM
 

Slightly-Taller
.

Member since 4/08

2516 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

we're engaged and we're just starting (SLOWLY) to enter the house hunt. we will probably but something before our wedding (july 2010)

Posted 5/14/09 10:47 AM
 

Cpt2007
A new love!

Member since 1/08

5946 total posts

Name:
Liz

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Posted by dpli

Personally, I would never do it. I guess I am old fashioned, but for me, I didn't want the commitment to a mortgage or to mix my finances with someone until I was actually married to them.

It looks like it worked out for lots of people on here, but I know a couple of people who did this and it became very messy when they broke up.



ita on all counts. we didn't even live together before getting engaged.

But this is a personal call-- it's different for everyone!

Posted 5/14/09 11:13 AM
 

Shorty
.

Member since 5/05

30390 total posts

Name:
really

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Posted by Cpt2007

Posted by dpli

Personally, I would never do it. I guess I am old fashioned, but for me, I didn't want the commitment to a mortgage or to mix my finances with someone until I was actually married to them.

It looks like it worked out for lots of people on here, but I know a couple of people who did this and it became very messy when they broke up.



ita on all counts. we didn't even live together before getting engaged.

But this is a personal call-- it's different for everyone!



same here. and after somewhat "being in the industry", i've learned there are difficulties in changing to your married name, amongst other things.

Posted 5/14/09 1:40 PM
 

sleepie76
enjoying every minute

Member since 12/07

3881 total posts

Name:

Re: Buying a house before engagement/marriage?

Posted by Blu-ize

Nope, I wouldn't. I'm too traditional. It's too big of a financial committment to do before the legal committment of marriage.

I wish you the best of luck though!Chat Icon




I agree.


I always think of Judge Judy when people that lived together sue each other. She always says," You weren't married, the law doesn't provide for you. "

Posted 5/15/09 8:08 AM
 
Pages: 1 [2]
 

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