Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

It's only the second day but I see a very big difference in the care and environment our new place offers vs the old. Lucas came home happy and exhausted the first day (bonus for us) and to my shock...his clothes were cleaned for us during his nap. We are so not used to that and I imagine the teachers must run themselves ragged. They are a great group.

Here's where I need some advice/words of wisdom....

In the morning when we drop him off he's fine if we are with him but when we leave he flips out and goes into the ugly cry. So we tried staying with him and doing the very prolonged good-bye and we tried saying a quick goodbye and leaving - both times he cries. It takes all my might not to go back to him but I really need him to learn it's okay and that the teachers there can help him. I know it's a brand new place and all brand new faces - has to be scary and confusing for him...on to of not having a way to communicate how he feels my heart breaks for him. But I know it's part of the process.

Any advice, tips, info on what we can do to make this better. When will it get better?

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

I'm sure it will get better as he becomes more adjusted. Have you tried talking about it on the ride there? Maybe hearing about it before hand will help to prepare him.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Message edited 8/6/2008 9:23:15 AM.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Ang- we started a new daycare about a month ago- and at first Kaitlyn was fine (it was like she didn't even know she switched daycares)- however 2 weeks or so into it, she would get very very upset when we left. She's never done that before- and one time I actually cried walking down the hallway hearing her cry.

Do you carry Lucas in? Or does he walk in? When she started to get upset, I would carry her in, and put away her bottles, and sign her in before I put her down. That did the trick- and now, I basically can't get in the door before she's trying to push herself down to get on the floor.

I'm sure its just a phase. He will get used to his new surroundings in no time.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Our children feed off of our stress and panic, even when we feel like we aren't showing it, so my best piece of advice is to behave nonchalantly and like it's no big deal when you drop him off. The more of a big deal you make out of it, the more he'll freak.

The best thing to do, in my experience, is to just stay peppy, upbeat, drop him off, give him a quick hug and kiss, and leave, even if he's screaming. In a few days he'll adapt and realize it's no big deal

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Posted by Bxgell2

Our children feed off of our stress and panic, even when we feel like we aren't showing it, so my best piece of advice is to behave nonchalantly and like it's no big deal when you drop him off. The more of a big deal you make out of it, the more he'll freak.

The best thing to do, in my experience, is to just stay peppy, upbeat, drop him off, give him a quick hug and kiss, and leave, even if he's screaming. In a few days he'll adapt and realize it's no big deal

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Posted by Ang-Rich

Posted by Bxgell2

Our children feed off of our stress and panic, even when we feel like we aren't showing it, so my best piece of advice is to behave nonchalantly and like it's no big deal when you drop him off. The more of a big deal you make out of it, the more he'll freak.

The best thing to do, in my experience, is to just stay peppy, upbeat, drop him off, give him a quick hug and kiss, and leave, even if he's screaming. In a few days he'll adapt and realize it's no big deal

As I read this I feel like this might be the bulls-eye! We HAVE to be stressed over this new situation and the old...and he MUST sense it. I think that DH and I have to change it up like you said...be peppy and excited about daycare from the moment we get in the car.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

It sounds like he's going through separation anxiety on top of getting adjusted to a new place. Our DS has been in the same center since he was 13 weeks old and just recently started crying when DH or I drop him off. He does it on some days but not on others. When he goes through these phases it lasts about a week or so and then he is okay. I'm sure as soon as he gets used to the new place it will be better.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Honestly, DH takes dd to daycare and she cries as soon as I walk out of the house. I NEVER turn back bc I figure that she is going to make this a pattern. Usually it stops within seconds. I would try to avoid any kind of pattern. He will stop...he has to. AND worst case scenario, they will call you if he doesnt or request that they call you if he doesnt. IMO...eliminate any future pattern of this for yourself. Nip it now.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Hey Ang!!!!
I peeked in on Lucas this morning, he was in the middle of a gaggle of kiddies with his teacher sitting on the floor next to him, he looked very focused on the toy he was playing with, and very happy too!
I waved and said hi Lucas! He looked up at me for a second and went back to his toy.

His teacher said he was doing very well and adjusting nicely. She was clearly spending a little extra time with him.

I think when you get out of the car in the lot, you should be excited and say things like YAY! We're going into school. This is what I do with Gavin. We wave to Aileen at the front desk, saying hello to everyone.
I think Lucas will feed off of your excitement and hopefully, in time, learn to be excited to go in as well.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Posted by curliegirl

Hey Ang!!!!
I peeked in on Lucas this morning, he was in the middle of a gaggle of kiddies with his teacher sitting on the floor next to him, he looked very focused on the toy he was playing with, and very happy too!
I waved and said hi Lucas! He looked up at me for a second and went back to his toy.

His teacher said he was doing very well and adjusting nicely. She was clearly spending a little extra time with him.

I think when you get out of the car in the lot, you should be excited and say things like YAY! We're going into school. This is what I do with Gavin. We wave to Aileen at the front desk, saying hello to everyone.
I think Lucas will feed off of your excitement and hopefully, in time, learn to be excited to go in as well.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

They cleaned his clothes for you!!!??? Holy crap.

I think it is just an adjustment and he will be fine. Luke went through a stage that he cried when I dropped him off and it killed me. But if I get him involved in some toys and occupied he is usually good, and I sneak out. When he does cry the teachers are usually there to pick him up and then he is fine.

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Re: Any advice on adjusting to a new daycare center?

Posted by Ang-Rich

Posted by jms100303

They cleaned his clothes for you!!!??? Holy crap.

I know! I nearly fainted when she told me. He got his shirt dirty so she changed it and while they were napping cleaned it...hung it out to dry and handed it to me folded.