Please tell me I'm not the only one...

I feel like such a bad mother sometimes. I realized tonight that I have nothing for her to wear for Thanksgiving. It never even crossed my mind until my mother asked me. Then, I found a dress for Christmas for her that I liked, but I keep forgetting to order it. Who does that? Who forgets about their baby's first Christmas dress? I also feel like I don't care whether or not I have professional holiday pictures of her or a picture with Santa or anything like that. I feel like I should want those things, but I just don't. I take pictures and videotape her constantly, but I just don't feel the need to run out and professional pictures or anything done. I haven't even gotten her baptized yet I don't know if it's that I'm totally overwhelmed with working fulltime and not having my husband around 5 days a week, but I just feel like none of those things matter to me, and that really bothers me big time. She's my baby girl, why am I not completely fumbling over myself to have all those typical "baby" things for her? I just feel guilty when it comes to all this.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

I had no idea that they need a special outfit for Thanksgiving...

Don't worry about it, those are just silly stuff, doesn't make you a bad mother at all!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Katie doesnt have a special outfit for thanksgiving either and Ive never taken her for professional pics. I might take her to see Santa but I hoenstly have SO many pic of her that I love I dont need any more, so you're not alone!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Sara dosnt have a special outfit for Thanksgiving and as far a pictures well I will take them at home. She will be one in Februay no sense in taking picts twice. I will get one yer old picts taken.

Maybe I will go buy sara a skirt or a dress at BRU for thanksgiving.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Oh gosh you sound exactly like me..i would not worry about that at all...you love your little girl and that is all that matters..im not into those things either..plus how many years to come are we going to have them..they are such a young age right now..i feel like professional pictures will be so exciting and cute the first few days maybe weeks..then they go into a album or a bin..then its next year...it just adds up..just take regular pictures and you will remember that special time.. maybe you are just emotional right now..the holidays are so hectic sometimes..its such a bad time of year..yet exciting..dont let people make you think that every holiday has to be a special outfit..or whatever.you are doing fine..you had a hard couple of months in the beginning from what i remember..just enjoy it now


oh and i havent gotten alexandra baptized either yet.. i had a rough beginning as well.im just getting adjusted now

Message edited 11/15/2006 10:27:26 PM.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Thanks girls. I'm very laid back about being a mom, and sometimes I worry that maybe i'm TOO laid back. I mean, I have over 1000 pictures of her since she was born, it's not like no one's taking her picture, I just don't feel like I want to have professional pictures. I was contemplating the other day calling photographers, then I realized that I don't really care if I have "professional" pictures. I just love the ones I take.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

oh yeah... Katie will be nearly 7 mos when she is baptized on Sunday!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

you're definitly not a bad mom. while i am a major picture taker (i mean every milestone on film) i totally understand. you love your daughter those things just don't matter to you!!! the only thing i think about is that my mom doesn't really have alot of pics of me done professionally or with santa or dressed up or anything and i would have liked to look at them as an adult!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

I've never taken Ella for 'professional' pics, and I don't know what she's wearing for Thanksgiving.

Personally, I'm not a fan of the super posed fake background professional shots. I prefer the ones we (or Barb ) take (and we take plenty!).

We had her baptism party early on only because I wanted the weather to be great for a backyard party - turned out we had the wettest coldest August day

Message edited 11/15/2006 10:40:10 PM.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

rachel dont be silly!
Im not a fan of the professional pictures either. Every time Ive gone, it's someone that happens to have a job taking pictures, definately not a true photographer. so what can they do that I cant? use props?
Ive taken very few "professional" pics (sears, JCP etc)
personally I love the pics that are IN THE MOMENT. my boys 1st bday pics, the true pic that to me is their TRUE "1st bday pic" is the pic that was taken that day, in the midst of it all, you can see the excitement, shock, in their eyes, etc I can feel it through the pic, where he was, what was going on, etc. So Im with you on that big time. and im anal about pics, whats in the background, whats not, etc. and MANY "photo-takers" at these stores could care less if the baby is whiny or if somethings wrinkled or not sitting right. im way to picky to have someone else in control
Thanksgiving outfit?? anything you pick, she will look gorgeous in!
youre enjoying HER every minute, not these details that "they say" to worry about, which means youre doing an AWESOME JOB !!!!!!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

I think it just has to do with working v. not working. We've christened her, taken her for tons of professional pics (everytime I get a free offer that is), and I went out ridiculously early to get her a dress for Christmas. I know it's all b/c I've got all the time in the world on my hands and we spend all day together at home and doing these things are not only nice but they get us out of the house so I don't go stir crazy. I've already told DH that none of these kinds of things are getting done if I go back to work b/c they be so low priority. Caring for your baby is what makes you a good or bad mom not picking out the right dress for Christmas and buying it early.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

you are not the only one...I sent DH to Old NAvy on his break yesterday to see if there was something for her for Thanksgiving.

No holiday pics yet.

Her Christmas dress is in NY but I have two outfits here also as well as a casual outfit to change her into.

No First Thanksgiving or Christmas bib or PJ's yet either. Don't have money for it and that is not what is important.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

You don't need a special outfit for Thanksgiving or Christmas. You don't need to have her pictures taken with Santa or professionally. Those things don't make a good mother. You are a great mother to her because you care for her, nurture her, protect her, soothe her, feed her, etc. That is what makes for a good mommy, not pictures or outfits!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Oh sweetie, you are NOT the only one and you shouldn't feel bad AT ALL. I have friends who run out and buy the christmas dress, have a professional photo ever 6 months, etc, and look at me like I"m an alien with 6 heads because in all honesty that stuff just does not matter to me. I love, adore my daughter, I truly do, but I think when you have a lot of other crap going on in your life, you realize what REALLY matters... and that's simply: spending time with your family. Laughing, giggling, playing... just being together. The other stuff is cute, but not for everyone, and it has absolutely no reflection on your parenting skills.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

you are a great mom !!! don't let it get you down at all - you do millions of things and still pull off it all - you're amazing! your dd doesn't care about any of that - she cares you love and care for her - which you do 150%!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Posted by WhatNow

I had no idea that they need a special outfit for Thanksgiving...

Don't worry about it, those are just silly stuff, doesn't make you a bad mother at all!

Message edited 11/16/2006 11:01:45 AM.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Posted by shamrock12472

You don't need a special outfit for Thanksgiving or Christmas. You don't need to have her pictures taken with Santa or professionally. Those things don't make a good mother. You are a great mother to her because you care for her, nurture her, protect her, soothe her, feed her, etc. That is what makes for a good mommy, not pictures or outfits!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

You are not the only one. Nate will be 18 months on Dec 1st and I still don't have professional pictures of him, unless you count the ones that they took at the hospital the day after he was born. We do have Santa pics from last year, but that only bc I happen to go to the mall that day and there weren't any lines.

For Thanksgiving he'll wear something we have in his closet. We're just going to the ILs, nothing big. For Christmas, my mom will probably send some stuff for me to choose from.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Don't feel bad, you are NOT a bad mom. I just took my son take professional pics last week because he turned one yesterday. I also don't have a special Thanksgiving Day outfit for him. He will be wearing something from his regular wadrobe that is comfy!

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Thank you girls so much. You made me feel so much better

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

My mom always bought the holiday outfits.
I never took my babies for professional pictures until they turned 1!
You are not a bad mommy. Cuz if you are, then I am too.
Oh, and I haven't baptized my dd and ds yet.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Don't kick yourself over these things. Your daughter knows that you love her. The things you are describing do not really matter.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

i took my dd to have christmas pics done at sears when she was 2 months old. what a totally disaster. now my dd is 4 years old and ds is 2, i have never had their pics professional done, i take my own christmas pic each year in the comfort of my house. my kids dont smile on command and i cant deal with crowds and the headache. my dd was not batized till she was 5 months old. all moms do things differently. and your doing your job as a wonderful mom!!!

oh yeah, as for thanksgiving. its jeans and sweaters. nothing special at all. its thanskgiving time to relax and have fun. the kids hate being all dressed up, why bother them

Message edited 11/16/2006 2:12:36 PM.

Re: Please tell me I'm not the only one...

I just want to let you know that my nephew is almost 6 months old and my sister still has not bapitized him. It does not matter when you do. All that matters is that you love your daughter as much as you do and no one can tell you how to do things for your daughter.