Off-Balance: Men Call For A More Balanced Life

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

Just recently I was having a conversation with a family member, both of us byproducts of a generation where instant gratification, independence and excess seemed to rule. Among us were members of a previous generation who started out with much less but ultimately seemed, regardless of material accomplishments, to have wound up with much more.

Ironically enough these folks got married MUCH younger, yet stayed together MUCH longer, and they had MUCH less to start out with than anyone I know did. And, strangely enough, though problems did exist, most of the wives were stay-at-home moms (at least for a good while, and proud of it), and for the most part, their children grew up just fine.

Still a byproduct of parents who were on the cusp of couplehood during the “60s” and the era’s “sexual revolution”, and despite the fact that MY mom was a “stay at home”, I grew up with the notion that power (as a woman) revolved around independence, freedom, and the ability to fend for myself. And, when I brought up the point to a family member, about how myself, and many women “struggle” with the idea of actually staying home, and that some would rather daddy do diaper duty while we climb the corporate ladder, he brought up a good point. He noted, that such set-ups often give men an appreciation for what moms have been doing for generations and centuries…and it actually gets them more involved with the family putting on full display their strengths and parenting skills.

And, one of my favorite radio show hosts, who prides himself on being “old-school” constantly reminds his listeners that parenting is a dual responsibility and BOTH parents need to be present and involved.

Yet, while many modern women continue to march to the beat of “I don’t need a man”,j many men are seemingly realizing that there’s more to life than just being the bread-winner. In fact, many hard-working husbands and fathers (even singles) are yearning for what we women are willing tossing to the wayside. They are longing for a better work-life balance and more time to spend at home; with friends and family, and with their wives and children.

In fact, studies and surveys suggest that regardless of traditional stereotypes (and who really knows if men honestly felt that way or were conditioned to react that way), more and more men prefer a 50/50 partnership with their mate, and are okay with sharing the responsibilities and sharing all the added perks of not shouldering on the financial responsibilities on their shoulders, adding that the “teamwork” approach gives them more emotional freedom to enjoy being an active part of the family and the household as well.

However, in this post “revolutionary” era, many ladies are longing for the opposite. In fact, research reveals that they would rather their mate earns enough to enable them to work only part-time or stay at home. And, with the cost of living constantly rises (not necessarily in proportion to increases in salaries), many couples feel like both HAVE to work, and long hours at that, plus contribute to the household and share in the raising of children. In fact, besides deciding on how to handle family life and fun effectively, one of the biggest complaints of contemporary couples is not enough time for themselves, with each other and most of all, with the kids.

Long Island Home & Lifestyle Articles > Off-Balance: Men Call For A More Balanced Life