Daycare second thoughts

I just came from visiting the daycare where my son will be starting in 2 weeks and I don't know how I'm going to leave him. He will be 4.5 months at that point and the infant room where he'll be goes up to 18 months. There were bigger kids running around and playing and I think he's going to be trampled or hit with flying toys. I am sure he would get used to the older kids but they were running up to him in the stroller and he was getting scared and crying. Maybe this place is not the right place for him? I know a nanny will be much more expensive and I'm not thrilled with having a stranger in our house all day. I guess I'm just looking to vent

Re: Daycare second thoughts

Is the infant room separated at all?
Where I go it's one big room but they have a low wall that separates the 6 week to 6 month olds- then on the other side- with different staff is the 7 - 12 month olds.

That seems like a big range for one room- I would have to imagine they would seperate it a bit somehow, no?

Daycare second thoughts

I don't think that a nanny is your only option. I went to a day care and the baby room was from 6 weeks to 18 months. I did not like that at all. There is such a difference between a 6 week old and a 1 year old. I looked at other places. The place I ended up sending my son to has 3 separate baby rooms. The first room is 6 weeks to about 5 months. The second room is about 6 months to about 12-14 months. The third room is from 12-14 months to about 18-20 months.

I would go with your gut and keep looking. Where are you located. Maybe some of us can suggest places to look.

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Daycare second thoughts

Keep looking. Many places have newborn rooms and toddler rooms to keep the babies separated

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OMG you sound like me..

Basically, I had seen a few places in my area. I was in LOVE with one but it was more money. The other place seemed good so I was going to go with them. I went in right before to possibly leave him for an hour, see how he did, and just tour it again. Well, I had such a bad experience walking through the door with what was going on there (really sick kids, a baby left unattended in a swing with a blanket over his face, etc.) that I didn't even want to leave him for a second. So, I just toured it, left, and then called the next day and said I was not going to go there. I just couldn't shake this bad feeling.

I made some adjustments in my life financially so I could afford the better place I had seen. BEST THING I EVER DID was listen to my gut knowing that the place was not right for him.

The place I am at now, and have been since he was five months, has a separate room for those who are younger --- they have one that is six weeks up until they start to crawl. Then, crawling and starting to walk and that stuff up until 18/19 months is another room. Then 18/19 months to three years is another room. And the place in general - cleaner, small teacher to child ratio, great activities, home-like setting. I cannot say enough about it and my son loves it there.

So, I would go with your gut.

It is going to be a hard transition NO MATTER WHAT --- but what made it doable and possible was loving the place that he went to.

Re: Daycare second thoughts

Posted by AliceCullen

I just came from visiting the daycare where my son will be starting in 2 weeks and I don't know how I'm going to leave him. He will be 4.5 months at that point and the infant room where he'll be goes up to 18 months. There were bigger kids running around and playing and I think he's going to be trampled or hit with flying toys. I am sure he would get used to the older kids but they were running up to him in the stroller and he was getting scared and crying. Maybe this place is not the right place for him? I know a nanny will be much more expensive and I'm not thrilled with having a stranger in our house all day. I guess I'm just looking to vent

Daycare second thoughts

We use an in home daycare with a variety of ages. When DD started at 6m, there was one little boy about a month younger and the rest of the kids were a year or older. We've never had an issue. But it's also a small place so there aren't too many kids (about 8). The babies are generally on one side and the older kids are on the other but they do comingle on occasion. I've never had a reason to be concerned. I will have a 6 week old starting there in the fall and DD will be 18 months then.

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Our daycare also separates babies 6weeks-6months, then 6months to 1 year, etc. I like it much better that way. You don't have to worry about the ones learning to walk falling on tiny ones during tummy time or while playing on the floor. It's less restricting for everyone and they can focus more on their development at their specific stage.

Daycare second thoughts

I can't imagine there not being some kind of separation. My 12 month old is a monster. She is such a loving snuggly kid, but she runs and hugs and tackles. I can't imagine her near a 6 week old or even a 5-6 month old whose beginning to be mobile.
She is still young to understand a lot, but at the same time physically very strong.
I'm sure most places have some sort of separation or procedure for keeping little ones separate.

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I would talk to the daycare and address your concerns and see what they say/how they handle the mixed ages in the same room

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The infant room at our daycare is not separated, they are all together, but the teachers watch them like hawks and are constantly interacting with all of the kids so we have never had an issue with injuries of any kind from older babies.

BUT, if you are getting a bad gut feeling about the center, listen to your instincts - maybe it's not right for you or DC. I was sad to leave my baby but I knew I loved the daycare, so while it was not easy at first, it worked out well in the end. Now the main teacher in the infant room is like family to us and I can't imagine my kids being anywhere else.

Daycare second thoughts

I would speak to the manager and see what she says. See how you feel after her explanation. I would be concerned as to how they address your concern. That may speak to how to they will handle other potential issues that may arise.

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Thanks everyone. I might make some inquiries at other places. Anyone have recommendations in the east meadow, levittown, wantagh area?

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If your gut tells you it's not the right place, then it's not the right place.

When DS was 4 months old, we put him in an in-home day care, so there were kids of all ages. He was there for a few weeks before I pulled him out. I, like you, didn't like that there were older kids there. I was afraid that they'd come up to DS in his swing or bouncer when the teacher had her back turned and hurt him. So I pulled him out. Best thing I ever did. At the time, we were living in Queens and had very limited day car options, so we got a nanny instead. (There are other concerns with a nanny - no situation is perfect!) We had her until DS was about 18 months old and then we moved to LI. DS has been in a large day care center since then and we love it. I'll be having #2 very soon and she'll be going to the same center in the fall. But there, she'll be in a baby room with only babies around her age.

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Doing some research using the search feature on here I was able to pull up some recommendations from other LIFer's who had/have children in daycare the general area you are looking to be in... These were suggested the most:

Above All Daycare in Seaford

Children's Nest (2 locations - Merrick and Wantagh)

Harbor Child Care in Mineola

Wee Friends in North Bellmore (they have a Wantagh location but that is just a pre-school so ages 2+... whereas the N. Bellmore location is daycare)

Hope that helps!!!


ETA -- here is a link to the NYS site so you can cross-check them to make sure they don't have any crazy violations. Most places will have something -- because there are so many things they check. But just so you can check to see if anything is a major one...

NYS SITE TO CHECK --

Message edited 5/18/2015 2:14:03 PM.

Re: Daycare second thoughts

Posted by DaniJude

Doing some research using the search feature on here I was able to pull up some recommendations from other LIFer's who had/have children in daycare the general area you are looking to be in... These were suggested the most:

Above All Daycare in Seaford

Children's Nest (2 locations - Merrick and Wantagh)

Harbor Child Care in Mineola

Wee Friends in North Bellmore (they have a Wantagh location but that is just a pre-school so ages 2+... whereas the N. Bellmore location is daycare)

Hope that helps!!!


ETA -- here is a link to the NYS site so you can cross-check them to make sure they don't have any crazy violations. Most places will have something -- because there are so many things they check. But just so you can check to see if anything is a major one...

NYS SITE TO CHECK --

Re: Daycare second thoughts

Daycare second thoughts

As a former infant teacher in a room of 6w-12m infants, if the teacher to child ratios are being met, it's not too hard to keep them separate. In the 2 years I worked there, I can't recall a single incident of an older infant hitting or injuring a younger infant.

Maybe that's why it doesn't bother me too much.

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Message edited 5/18/2015 3:39:18 PM.

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Listen to your gut.
We went with a babysitter. No regrets.

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Message edited 5/19/2015 8:31:27 AM.

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