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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Good thing you shared this with us because this type of behavior is not only illegal but its downright unacceptable in this day and age! I would seriously consider suing, if it werent for Gretchen Carlson, the takedown of Roger Ailes wouldn't have happened. If women stay silent, this type of crap still goes on!! Shame on any women on this thread who don't take this seriously - its the silence that functions as a form of apathetic acceptance. I bet this jerk who interviewed you is probably a jerk to his female associates! All it takes is women to come forward and open the gates for the claims to come in..Until this happens, this crap will get swept under the rug and abuses will continue.
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Posted 10/19/16 1:02 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Paramount
Sweet!
Member since 7/12 4287 total posts
Name:
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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
I have already spoke with my attorney. We have a family friend who is in this field. He said we should just wait and see what happens.
Like I said I am not the suing type nor have a REAL desire to take this forward. But I DID tell my attorney to preserve my rights.
Legally they broke the law. I am not a protected class but the QUESTIONS are illegal.
And just to clarify. My job is understood that you travel to where a trial is happening. SO if I am a litigation paralegal with over 11 years experience the questions should have been "so you have traveled a lot for litigation right? This job isabout the same, lots of travel for trials." Or something like that.
Its understood that this job requires travel.
But again the the crux of it.
It is illegal to ask these questions. The reason is so you are not discriminated against getting a job because you might have to take school days off or sick kid days, or days to go to their plays, or days to go to parent teacher night.
Its wrong. Its illegal.
And yes I absolutely stood up for anyone else who will be interviewed for this position, and now, anyone at that law firm. They know they are in the weeds with this.
Message edited 10/19/2016 2:50:09 PM.
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| Posted 10/19/16 2:49 PM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Instead of asking if your husband will allow you to travel by yourself or if you'll be forbidden to step away from the kitchen for a few days (yes, my interpretation of his words, my feminist slant), he could have simply asked if there would be any problem with you traveling and being away from home for a number of days at a time.
When I interviewed for my current job, the person who interviewed me (also a lawyer, and frankly, as sexist as they come but smart enough to keep that ish to himself in an interview) said "you know this isn't the kind of place where everyone runs out at 5:30. He made his point very clearly without breaking any laws (I hope you don't think you'll be able to run out and pick your kids up after school every day, because it's not happening).
The interviewer needs to take a lesson or two in interviews 101.
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| Posted 10/19/16 2:57 PM |
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CSK
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/11 892 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by EatingMyVeggies
Posted by Bridex100
Posted by CSK
Posted by StaceyWill
I think the point of this post is being missed. No matter what...it is NOT OK to get asked these questions on an interview. Especially, since a man would NEVER be asked the same thing. It's sexist, by definition.
I have to disagree with this.
I'm a man, I haven't been asked the question as blatant, but they do ask leading travel questions and extra time questions that mention family/work commitments. I was especially sensitive in mentioning my son in the interview at all.
I worked in public accounting, that was full of travel and extra hours. If any parent sits there and thinks they can have it all and stay on the fast track, they are deluding themselves. Woman, man whatever. If you're able to eat dinner with your family, make any of the school functions, take time off when they're sick et al, and not staying up half the night working, you're not going to stay on the fast track completely. The only people who I've seen have kids and keep on the fast track had their SO stay home and deal with everything at home.
I don't disagree that they shouldn't have asked the questions in the way they were asked, however, the real goal of the questions were whether travel would be OK for you and whether you could handle the work schedule with your family life, which are perfectly valid concerns for both man and women candidates.
The questions are inappropriate. Its the hire/no hire part that is illegal.
I don't know how your recruiter handled it with the HR department. If he went in guns blazing, I certainly wouldn't want to take the job if it were offered.
If the partner is an old school guy who stepped out of line, but you could deal with, I would have considered rolling the dice and seeing if I got the offer without scorching the earth.
I agree that it is now an awkward situation. I personally would have waited to see if I got offered the position first.
I don't agree with either. I've seen people become very successful who have families even though they work crazy hours but are still available for their families. IMO, no self-respecting modern working person would want to be employed with a firm like that. Or even roll the dice and see. No man would ever be asked if he planned on having kids. It's gross and it's wrong and further puts people back.
The best employers (and the ones that should be rewarded and who have the happiest, most productive employees) are the ones who promote a healthy work/life balance and support families of all kinds. That's the key to having great and loyal employees. Those are the employees who may work long hours but are given some time back to spend with their families. It's a balance, and it's give-and-take. That is what good employers do.
When we continue to overlook these things or make excuses for them, we are furthering the problem.
We should all be doing whatever we can to stop this nonsense now before our kids are in the workforce ( especially daughters.)
And yes those questions are sexist and maybe it's hard to understand if you are a man exactly why they are sexist.
And I must say, it's kind of annoying how it's on the original poster not to scorch the earth when experiencing disgusting 1950s sexism in an interview when she's a career woman and doesn't even have children. Not all women want kids or have them. Should never come up in an interview. Period. And saying that travel - it would be hard on a marriage - come the F on. Talk about mansplaining. Does that guy say the same to the men he interviews? Doubt it.
And boo-hoo that it's awkward… Maybe it wouldn't be if this guy wasn't a sexist asss.
The only way to change this disgusting culture is to call it out.
guess I need to be a woman to understand sexism, discrimination, whatever.
IMHO, everyone is big here on blowing this up, calling illegal etc.
You want to change the world, go right ahead. I support you. I got shit from my boss and others for taking 2 weeks when my kid was born.
The guy should take an HR course, but it still comes down to the basic question, does the travel and hours work with your home life? which is a pretty FN legitimate question for both a man or a woman and one that I have been asked and have asked people when interviewing for jobs.
Message edited 10/19/2016 4:17:17 PM.
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| Posted 10/19/16 4:09 PM |
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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
No you don't have to be a woman to understand. But if you don't find those questions the OP was asked as sexist (and I say that because you wrote you disagreed), then I don't think you have a full grasp.
OP didn't say the question was "hey, these hours are insane. Do you foresee any issues?" The questions were "do you plan on having a child?" And "the travel can be hard on a marriage." Both of which are sexist and wrong.
I've had two manager interviews for positions that were very demanding in the last couple years. Neither interviewer asked me if I had kids or if i would have an issue juggling the demand - because they are professional and there's also the mutual respec t that if you've been in an industry for awhile, you know what to expect (just like the OP.)
OP even states that the interviewer asked if she was married and what her husband thought. If you don't see that as sexist......
Message edited 10/19/2016 4:35:16 PM.
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| Posted 10/19/16 4:33 PM |
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oneday
<3
Member since 5/05 4319 total posts
Name:
Pam
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by CSK
guess I need to be a woman to understand sexism, discrimination, whatever.
IMHO, everyone is big here on blowing this up, calling illegal etc.
You want to change the world, go right ahead. I support you. I got shit from my boss and others for taking 2 weeks when my kid was born.
The guy should take an HR course, but it still comes down to the basic question, does the travel and hours work with your home life? which is a pretty FN legitimate question for both a man or a woman and one that I have been asked and have asked people when interviewing for jobs.
I don't think anyone said that, but I may have missed it. I certainly don't think you need to be a woman to understand discrimination, but I don't think a man has generally had to deal with this particular type of discrimination in the same way.
And it should go the other way. A man should be able to take some time with his newborn as well. Hopefully we are on our way to more of this.
I disagree that this is "blowing it up." If people are not called out on stuff like that, it keeps happening. It's fine to say "so don't take a job" with a company who does that, but the fact is the will continue to do it until someone does let them know it is unacceptable.
Absolutely in a job with a lot of travel, it is understandable and important to be sure that a potential employee understands the expectations. But as we can see from the woman on this board, there are many different situations and some women (mothers/wives/both/neither) would be able to adhere to this type of schedule for many different reasons, and many would not.
And, I am also not a suing type of person either, but any company should be aware that this type of behavior certainly opens them up to lawsuits. Regardless of whether they win or not, I would think in terms of PR, it would not look good.
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| Posted 10/19/16 4:40 PM |
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ap123
LIF Infant
Member since 10/10 268 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by CSK
Posted by EatingMyVeggies
Posted by Bridex100
Posted by CSK
Posted by StaceyWill
I think the point of this post is being missed. No matter what...it is NOT OK to get asked these questions on an interview. Especially, since a man would NEVER be asked the same thing. It's sexist, by definition.
I have to disagree with this.
I'm a man, I haven't been asked the question as blatant, but they do ask leading travel questions and extra time questions that mention family/work commitments. I was especially sensitive in mentioning my son in the interview at all.
I worked in public accounting, that was full of travel and extra hours. If any parent sits there and thinks they can have it all and stay on the fast track, they are deluding themselves. Woman, man whatever. If you're able to eat dinner with your family, make any of the school functions, take time off when they're sick et al, and not staying up half the night working, you're not going to stay on the fast track completely. The only people who I've seen have kids and keep on the fast track had their SO stay home and deal with everything at home.
I don't disagree that they shouldn't have asked the questions in the way they were asked, however, the real goal of the questions were whether travel would be OK for you and whether you could handle the work schedule with your family life, which are perfectly valid concerns for both man and women candidates.
The questions are inappropriate. Its the hire/no hire part that is illegal.
I don't know how your recruiter handled it with the HR department. If he went in guns blazing, I certainly wouldn't want to take the job if it were offered.
If the partner is an old school guy who stepped out of line, but you could deal with, I would have considered rolling the dice and seeing if I got the offer without scorching the earth.
I agree that it is now an awkward situation. I personally would have waited to see if I got offered the position first.
I don't agree with either. I've seen people become very successful who have families even though they work crazy hours but are still available for their families. IMO, no self-respecting modern working person would want to be employed with a firm like that. Or even roll the dice and see. No man would ever be asked if he planned on having kids. It's gross and it's wrong and further puts people back.
The best employers (and the ones that should be rewarded and who have the happiest, most productive employees) are the ones who promote a healthy work/life balance and support families of all kinds. That's the key to having great and loyal employees. Those are the employees who may work long hours but are given some time back to spend with their families. It's a balance, and it's give-and-take. That is what good employers do.
When we continue to overlook these things or make excuses for them, we are furthering the problem.
We should all be doing whatever we can to stop this nonsense now before our kids are in the workforce ( especially daughters.)
And yes those questions are sexist and maybe it's hard to understand if you are a man exactly why they are sexist.
And I must say, it's kind of annoying how it's on the original poster not to scorch the earth when experiencing disgusting 1950s sexism in an interview when she's a career woman and doesn't even have children. Not all women want kids or have them. Should never come up in an interview. Period. And saying that travel - it would be hard on a marriage - come the F on. Talk about mansplaining. Does that guy say the same to the men he interviews? Doubt it.
And boo-hoo that it's awkward… Maybe it wouldn't be if this guy wasn't a sexist asss.
The only way to change this disgusting culture is to call it out.
guess I need to be a woman to understand sexism, discrimination, whatever.
IMHO, everyone is big here on blowing this up, calling illegal etc.
You want to change the world, go right ahead. I support you. I got shit from my boss and others for taking 2 weeks when my kid was born.
The guy should take an HR course, but it still comes down to the basic question, does the travel and hours work with your home life? which is a pretty FN legitimate question for both a man or a woman and one that I have been asked and have asked people when interviewing for jobs.
I don't think anyone has a problem with the question of whether she understands that there is travel and long hours involved, the issue is that there is no need to bring up husband, children or family commitments. The guy could have said, travel is required xx% of the time and a typical day is from 8am to 8pm, is that an issue for you?. Who cares if she has kids, pets, a husband, it has nothing to do with her availability. Some people aren't willing to sacrifice work /life balance and some are. Has nothing to do with if you have kids.
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| Posted 10/19/16 5:04 PM |
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MC09
arrrghhh!!!!
Member since 2/09 5674 total posts
Name:
Me speaks pirate!
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by CSK
Posted by EatingMyVeggies
Posted by Bridex100
Posted by CSK
Posted by StaceyWill
I think the point of this post is being missed. No matter what...it is NOT OK to get asked these questions on an interview. Especially, since a man would NEVER be asked the same thing. It's sexist, by definition.
I have to disagree with this.
I'm a man, I haven't been asked the question as blatant, but they do ask leading travel questions and extra time questions that mention family/work commitments. I was especially sensitive in mentioning my son in the interview at all.
I worked in public accounting, that was full of travel and extra hours. If any parent sits there and thinks they can have it all and stay on the fast track, they are deluding themselves. Woman, man whatever. If you're able to eat dinner with your family, make any of the school functions, take time off when they're sick et al, and not staying up half the night working, you're not going to stay on the fast track completely. The only people who I've seen have kids and keep on the fast track had their SO stay home and deal with everything at home.
I don't disagree that they shouldn't have asked the questions in the way they were asked, however, the real goal of the questions were whether travel would be OK for you and whether you could handle the work schedule with your family life, which are perfectly valid concerns for both man and women candidates.
The questions are inappropriate. Its the hire/no hire part that is illegal.
I don't know how your recruiter handled it with the HR department. If he went in guns blazing, I certainly wouldn't want to take the job if it were offered.
If the partner is an old school guy who stepped out of line, but you could deal with, I would have considered rolling the dice and seeing if I got the offer without scorching the earth.
I agree that it is now an awkward situation. I personally would have waited to see if I got offered the position first.
I don't agree with either. I've seen people become very successful who have families even though they work crazy hours but are still available for their families. IMO, no self-respecting modern working person would want to be employed with a firm like that. Or even roll the dice and see. No man would ever be asked if he planned on having kids. It's gross and it's wrong and further puts people back.
The best employers (and the ones that should be rewarded and who have the happiest, most productive employees) are the ones who promote a healthy work/life balance and support families of all kinds. That's the key to having great and loyal employees. Those are the employees who may work long hours but are given some time back to spend with their families. It's a balance, and it's give-and-take. That is what good employers do.
When we continue to overlook these things or make excuses for them, we are furthering the problem.
We should all be doing whatever we can to stop this nonsense now before our kids are in the workforce ( especially daughters.)
And yes those questions are sexist and maybe it's hard to understand if you are a man exactly why they are sexist.
And I must say, it's kind of annoying how it's on the original poster not to scorch the earth when experiencing disgusting 1950s sexism in an interview when she's a career woman and doesn't even have children. Not all women want kids or have them. Should never come up in an interview. Period. And saying that travel - it would be hard on a marriage - come the F on. Talk about mansplaining. Does that guy say the same to the men he interviews? Doubt it.
And boo-hoo that it's awkward… Maybe it wouldn't be if this guy wasn't a sexist asss.
The only way to change this disgusting culture is to call it out.
guess I need to be a woman to understand sexism, discrimination, whatever.
IMHO, everyone is big here on blowing this up, calling illegal etc.
You want to change the world, go right ahead. I support you. I got shit from my boss and others for taking 2 weeks when my kid was born.
The guy should take an HR course, but it still comes down to the basic question, does the travel and hours work with your home life? which is a pretty FN legitimate question for both a man or a woman and one that I have been asked and have asked people when interviewing for jobs.
But there are other ways to gauge the interviewee's commitment to the responsibilities to the position without having to ask personal questions. He could've simply stated "look, the hours and amount of travel are very demanding. I see from your resume you ALREADY have experience with such responsibilities. Will this be a problem for you as we need a candidate that is fully on board with said responsibilities" or some variation of that. No need to treat her like an invalid and let her know travel is a hardship on a relationship, I'm pretty sure she's already aware of that. And isn't it sad that you got shit for taking time off to care for your newborn? Male or female it doesn't matter.
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| Posted 10/19/16 5:09 PM |
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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
I really would love to be on an interview and the interviewer asks me "Work travel is really hard on a marriage. what does your spouse/partner think of all this?"
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| Posted 10/19/16 5:19 PM |
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Pumpkin1
LIF Adult
Member since 12/05 3715 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
From the Equal Employment Opportunities Commission (EEOC) website:
Pre-Employment Inquiries and Marital Status or Number of Children
Questions about marital status and number and ages of children are frequently used to discriminate against women and may violate Title VII if used to deny or limit employment opportunities.
It is clearly discriminatory to ask such questions only of women and not men (or vice-versa). Even if asked of both men and women, such questions may be seen as evidence of intent to discriminate against, for example, women with children.
Generally, employers should not use non job-related questions involving marital status, number and/or ages of children or dependents, or names of spouses or children of the applicant. Such inquiries may be asked after an employment offer has been made and accepted if needed for insurance or other legitimate business purposes.
The following pre-employment inquiries may be regarded as evidence of intent to discriminate when asked in the pre-employment context:
Whether applicant is pregnant.
Marital status of applicant or whether applicant plans to marry.
Number and age of children or future child bearing plans.
Child care arrangements.
Employment status of spouse.
Name of spouse.
https://www.eeoc.gov/laws/practices/inquiries_marital_status.cfm
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| Posted 10/19/16 6:36 PM |
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ChilisWife
God Bless America
Member since 5/05 3570 total posts
Name:
A.K.
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
I was once asked a question on an interview to the effect of "do you have any other commitments that would prevent you from being here during certain days or hours." The question didn't bother me really...he asked it in an "acceptable" way but of course I knew what he was really getting at was whether I'd have to leave early to pick up a kid or take days off when they were sick, etc. I didn't tell him whether or not I had kids (I do) and I answered the question "no" (of course) but that wasn't really the truth - because the reality was that I was looking for a different job so I could be closer to home and have the opportunity to actually see my children sometimes. I ended up getting the job offer but I turned it down because the fact that he asked that question gave me a glimpse into what the job would be like. So, in retrospect, I'm glad he asked!
Message edited 10/19/2016 7:58:50 PM.
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| Posted 10/19/16 7:58 PM |
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Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed
Member since 4/09 6691 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
On the flip side of this, I had an interview for a job working for NYC today. They must have been burned way too many times at this stage, because the interview was so sterile I felt like I was going into pre op!
And I think they may have been filming me but I can't be sure. I was not asked to sign any waver about being filmed, but they (panel of 4) sat me at the head of a table (I was told where to sit) with a camera lens on the far wall pointed at me (embedded in the wall).
They each read pre printed questions they were assigned to read.
I was told at the beginning that they were "only allowed to read the question, not interpret it or answer any questions about the questions." I could ask them only to repeat the question and I could ask questions at the end, but they were not allowed to ask me anything not written on the paper, no follow up questions, nothing. Even they looked annoyed at this process.
It felt straight out of 1984 actually. But it leaves no room for dumbazz illegal, sexist or any other ist type of questions.
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| Posted 10/19/16 11:43 PM |
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sameinitials
insert creative comment here
Member since 2/12 1998 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by Mushesgirl
On the flip side of this, I had an interview for a job working for NYC today. They must have been burned way too many times at this stage, because the interview was so sterile I felt like I was going into pre op!
And I think they may have been filming me but I can't be sure. I was not asked to sign any waver about being filmed, but they (panel of 4) sat me at the head of a table (I was told where to sit) with a camera lens on the far wall pointed at me (embedded in the wall).
They each read pre printed questions they were assigned to read.
I was told at the beginning that they were "only allowed to read the question, not interpret it or answer any questions about the questions." I could ask them only to repeat the question and I could ask questions at the end, but they were not allowed to ask me anything not written on the paper, no follow up questions, nothing. Even they looked annoyed at this process.
It felt straight out of 1984 actually. But it leaves no room for dumbazz illegal, sexist or any other ist type of questions.
I had an interview like this once. It was really awkward. Half the time the questions overlapped a bit so I already answered them, but they had to ask if anyway. It was also hard for me to get any feel for them, since there was no back and forth conversation.
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| Posted 10/20/16 7:04 AM |
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Paramount
Sweet!
Member since 7/12 4287 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Veggies
And I must say, it's kind of annoying how it's on the original poster not to scorch the earth when experiencing disgusting 1950s sexism in an interview when she's a career woman and doesn't even have children. Not all women want kids or have them. Should never come up in an interview. Period. And saying that travel - it would be hard on a marriage - come the F on. Talk about mansplaining. Does that guy say the same to the men he interviews? Doubt it.
And boo-hoo that it's awkward… Maybe it wouldn't be if this guy wasn't a sexist asss.
The only way to change this disgusting culture is to call it out.
EDITED::::: I am leaving the response but I give my HUMBLE apology to Veggies. I misunderstood. I literally read it incorrectly.
I READ THIS WRONG AND I AM WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!
The sentiment is correct, but I completely retract it toward Veggies
******My apology to VEGGIES*********
I misunderstood what happened. I was wrong.
The response I am leaving up: (ANd the reason is that it has already been quoted, and that I want anyone who thinks this was ok to see why its not)
And I want to say something as the OP to this statement.
You were not there. You do not know the circumstances of how it happened and how it played it.
You have no idea if I "scorched earth" their ass or not.
THIS kind of criticism is why rape victims don't come forward, or women don't report sexual discrimination.
I made a VERY calculated judgement on how to handle it. At the time, and after.
The main reason of not calling him out on the spot? My reputation in the industry. There are not a lot of women who do what I do. The industry is small so a lot of know a lot of us. If I blew this up on the spot it could cost me working in the industry period. The same industry that pays my mortgage, put food on my table and puts gas in the car. So If I blew it up and went off the handle (or even calmly and quietly) I become the b1tch and would probably get badmouthed. If I get badmouthed and a bad reputation I could never work in the industry again. One that I have clawed, and scratched and climbed my way to the top of. One where it took me 11 years to be so good I could finally open my own company doing it. This VERY similar thing happened in my acting carer. I had one bad thing happen, I got badmouthed and never worked again because of this one a$$hole sexist producer.
SO you can understand, now, why I am calculated, smart and calm about how I am handling this.
I IMMEDIATELY spoke to the recruiter. The moment I stepped onto the sidewalk. I then spoke with her boss who is the owner of the company. I got advice from my attorney who handles these kinds of cases and knows what he is doing. My attorney said lets wait and see how it plays out.
I ask that you wait to condemn me before walking a mile in my shoes.
Because seeing how this plays out gives me more leverage to make it right for the next woman who comes along who will just take it and walk away.
I am not that woman.
EDITED::::: I am leaving the response but I give my HUMBLE apology to Veggies. I misunderstood.
The sentiment is correct, but I completely retract it toward Veggies.
I READ THIS WRONG. I MISUNDERSTOOD AND I WAS WRONG.
******My apology to VEGGIES*********
Message edited 10/20/2016 5:19:09 PM.
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| Posted 10/20/16 2:37 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by Mushesgirl
On the flip side of this, I had an interview for a job working for NYC today. They must have been burned way too many times at this stage, because the interview was so sterile I felt like I was going into pre op!
And I think they may have been filming me but I can't be sure. I was not asked to sign any waver about being filmed, but they (panel of 4) sat me at the head of a table (I was told where to sit) with a camera lens on the far wall pointed at me (embedded in the wall).
They each read pre printed questions they were assigned to read.
I was told at the beginning that they were "only allowed to read the question, not interpret it or answer any questions about the questions." I could ask them only to repeat the question and I could ask questions at the end, but they were not allowed to ask me anything not written on the paper, no follow up questions, nothing. Even they looked annoyed at this process.
It felt straight out of 1984 actually. But it leaves no room for dumbazz illegal, sexist or any other ist type of questions.
Just so you know, we have a camera like that in our conference room in NYC. It's part of our telepresence system for video meetings.
I don't think they can record you without your knowledge.
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| Posted 10/20/16 3:46 PM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by Paramount
Posted by EatingMyVeggies
And I must say, it's kind of annoying how it's on the original poster not to scorch the earth when experiencing disgusting 1950s sexism in an interview when she's a career woman and doesn't even have children. Not all women want kids or have them. Should never come up in an interview. Period. And saying that travel - it would be hard on a marriage - come the F on. Talk about mansplaining. Does that guy say the same to the men he interviews? Doubt it.
And boo-hoo that it's awkward… Maybe it wouldn't be if this guy wasn't a sexist asss.
The only way to change this disgusting culture is to call it out.
And I want to say something as the OP to this statement.
You were not there. You do not know the circumstances of how it happened and how it played it.
You have no idea if I "scorched earth" their ass or not.
THIS kind of criticism is why rape victims don't come forward, or women don't report sexual discrimination.
I made a VERY calculated judgement on how to handle it. At the time, and after.
The main reason of not calling him out on the spot? My reputation in the industry. There are not a lot of women who do what I do. The industry is small so a lot of know a lot of us. If I blew this up on the spot it could cost me working in the industry period. The same industry that pays my mortgage, put food on my table and puts gas in the car. So If I blew it up and went off the handle (or even calmly and quietly) I become the b1tch and would probably get badmouthed. If I get badmouthed and a bad reputation I could never work in the industry again. One that I have clawed, and scratched and climbed my way to the top of. One where it took me 11 years to be so good I could finally open my own company doing it. This VERY similar thing happened in my acting carer. I had one bad thing happen, I got badmouthed and never worked again because of this one a$$hole sexist producer.
SO you can understand, now, why I am calculated, smart and calm about how I am handling this.
I IMMEDIATELY spoke to the recruiter. The moment I stepped onto the sidewalk. I then spoke with her boss who is the owner of the company. I got advice from my attorney who handles these kinds of cases and knows what he is doing. My attorney said lets wait and see how it plays out.
SO with a deep amount of respect to Veggies, I ask that you wait to condemn me before walking a mile in my shoes.
Because seeing how this plays out gives me more leverage to make it right for the next woman who comes along who will just take it and walk away.
I am not that woman.
Again, I do say this VERY respectfully to you, Veggies.
 Maybe I missed something, but I don't think Veggies condemned you at all. I think she was fully supporting your position and calling out anyone who said you shouldn't have complained to the recruiter.
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| Posted 10/20/16 4:15 PM |
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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Yeah I totally support you paramount. My response was to someone who felt people were blowing it out of proportion here. I believe you were wronged.
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| Posted 10/20/16 4:21 PM |
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Kitten1929
LIF Adult
Member since 1/13 6040 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by Paramount
Posted by EatingMyVeggies
And I must say, it's kind of annoying how it's on the original poster not to scorch the earth when experiencing disgusting 1950s sexism in an interview when she's a career woman and doesn't even have children. Not all women want kids or have them. Should never come up in an interview. Period. And saying that travel - it would be hard on a marriage - come the F on. Talk about mansplaining. Does that guy say the same to the men he interviews? Doubt it.
And boo-hoo that it's awkward… Maybe it wouldn't be if this guy wasn't a sexist asss.
The only way to change this disgusting culture is to call it out.
And I want to say something as the OP to this statement.
You were not there. You do not know the circumstances of how it happened and how it played it.
You have no idea if I "scorched earth" their ass or not.
THIS kind of criticism is why rape victims don't come forward, or women don't report sexual discrimination.
I made a VERY calculated judgement on how to handle it. At the time, and after.
The main reason of not calling him out on the spot? My reputation in the industry. There are not a lot of women who do what I do. The industry is small so a lot of know a lot of us. If I blew this up on the spot it could cost me working in the industry period. The same industry that pays my mortgage, put food on my table and puts gas in the car. So If I blew it up and went off the handle (or even calmly and quietly) I become the b1tch and would probably get badmouthed. If I get badmouthed and a bad reputation I could never work in the industry again. One that I have clawed, and scratched and climbed my way to the top of. One where it took me 11 years to be so good I could finally open my own company doing it. This VERY similar thing happened in my acting carer. I had one bad thing happen, I got badmouthed and never worked again because of this one a$$hole sexist producer.
SO you can understand, now, why I am calculated, smart and calm about how I am handling this.
I IMMEDIATELY spoke to the recruiter. The moment I stepped onto the sidewalk. I then spoke with her boss who is the owner of the company. I got advice from my attorney who handles these kinds of cases and knows what he is doing. My attorney said lets wait and see how it plays out.
SO with a deep amount of respect to Veggies, I ask that you wait to condemn me before walking a mile in my shoes.
Because seeing how this plays out gives me more leverage to make it right for the next woman who comes along who will just take it and walk away.
I am not that woman.
Again, I do say this VERY respectfully to you, Veggies.
I'm not sure why you're going after Veggies? She is basically on your side.
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| Posted 10/20/16 4:25 PM |
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
I have to agree with Ap123. They just need to tell you it requires travel and if you have a problem working overtime. Most jobs tell you this upfront. The interviewer's line of questioning was wrong!
This reminds me of an interview I had years ago where I happen to be carrying a Louis Vuitton bag (maybe I shouldn't have in hindsight) and the interviewer, a fellow female, asked me what my husband did for a living?
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| Posted 10/20/16 4:54 PM |
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Paramount
Sweet!
Member since 7/12 4287 total posts
Name:
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I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
******My apology to VEGGIES*********
I misunderstood what happened. I was wrong.
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| Posted 10/20/16 5:13 PM |
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shadows
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 4694 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by Newcreation316
I have to agree with Ap123. They just need to tell you it requires travel and if you have a problem working overtime. Most jobs tell you this upfront. The interviewer's line of questioning was wrong!
This reminds me of an interview I had years ago where I happen to be carrying a Louis Vuitton bag (maybe I shouldn't have in hindsight) and the interviewer, a fellow female, asked me what my husband did for a living?
Depending on the tone I don't think this would bother me - I'd probably just think she was making conversation. But I feel like I have an abnormally thick skin for this stuff.
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| Posted 10/20/16 5:27 PM |
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by Paramount
******My apology to VEGGIES*********
I misunderstood what happened. I was wrong.
No worries!
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| Posted 10/20/16 5:31 PM |
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Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed
Member since 4/09 6691 total posts
Name:
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Re: I had a job interview 2 days ago. Got asked sexist questions. ***Small Update at top***
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by Mushesgirl
On the flip side of this, I had an interview for a job working for NYC today. They must have been burned way too many times at this stage, because the interview was so sterile I felt like I was going into pre op!
And I think they may have been filming me but I can't be sure. I was not asked to sign any waver about being filmed, but they (panel of 4) sat me at the head of a table (I was told where to sit) with a camera lens on the far wall pointed at me (embedded in the wall).
They each read pre printed questions they were assigned to read.
I was told at the beginning that they were "only allowed to read the question, not interpret it or answer any questions about the questions." I could ask them only to repeat the question and I could ask questions at the end, but they were not allowed to ask me anything not written on the paper, no follow up questions, nothing. Even they looked annoyed at this process.
It felt straight out of 1984 actually. But it leaves no room for dumbazz illegal, sexist or any other ist type of questions.
Just so you know, we have a camera like that in our conference room in NYC. It's part of our telepresence system for video meetings.
I don't think they can record you without your knowledge.
Good to know; I only thought it because the directed me where to sit!
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| Posted 10/20/16 10:36 PM |
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