"Fake" aunts and uncles

I really hate using "aunt" and "uncle" for people who are not actual aunts and uncles. Some of my husband's friends call themselves Aunt and Uncle to our boys, even though we never do. I don't want to insult them or hurt their feelings, but I really don't want them to be called that. I know a lot of people have their kids call their friends Aunt and Uncle (especially since people don't really do the whole "Mr. and Mrs." thing anymore), so I was just wondering how many of you do it. I'm wondering if I'm really not the norm!

Re: "Fake" aunts and uncles

I think it's stupid and I never introduce it but some of my friends call themselves aunts and I don't say anything bc it's not that important to me. If my kids ever ask I'll explain but right now they're too young.

Re: "Fake" aunts and uncles

We have a small family, so a few very close older cousins are called Aunt or Uncle (like DD2's Godmother and Godfather). For very close friends we often use the title "Mamma Jessica" or "Mamma Christine". Our children know them as their friends' mothers (i.e. XXX's mommy). For us, adding the title "Mamma" before their name denotes a level of closeness and respect.

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sometimes friends are closer than family...and its a respect thing for me... to each their own, if you dont like it then put a stop to it

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it depends on the closeness of such friends, i would find it stupid if saw DHs friend who we see once a year introduces themselves as Aunt Jane and Uncle Jack, but....

my best friend and her family are my 2nd family. both my parents are deceased and they were the ones who i spent all my christmas's easters, etc with. so they are Aunt Jane and Uncle Jack.

i am their children's aunt as they are my children's aunt.

my other friends are just "jane"

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I don't do it either. I think it's for family unless you don't have a family. But that. Sing said I would just say, "joe" is coming and if he said its "uncle joe" I wouldn't t correct them. I would just let it be. Lots of people do it so it's probably natural to say it.

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DS has only 2 uncles, who don't even live in US, so yes he calls our friends aunts and uncles. They are closer to us than our own family.

In DH family nobody calls themselves uncles and aunts. They are just Joe or Suzanne, and they are real uncles and aunts. They are just weird like that.

Re: "Fake" aunts and uncles

Posted by wjb5707

Posted by MrsW2010

sometimes friends are closer than family...and its a respect thing for me... to each their own, if you dont like it then put a stop to it

My Friends are much closer to my kids than my sister is, they deserve that status more than my actualy blood sisiter so, I don't think there is a problem, but I think it depends on each persons situation.

Re: "Fake" aunts and uncles

We have a few close longtime friends that are Aunt __________& Uncle_______.

It was a mutual agreement that both parties were fine with our kids calling us that. But it would bother me if someone I wasn't close to called themselves Aunt & Uncle to my kids & I'd correct them.

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My kids call DH's cousins "aunt and uncle." We also have 3 close family friends that they call aunt and uncle.

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We have a very small family but have a couple of friends who we have known our entire life & they are just like family. We Ro refer to them ww Aunt & Uncle as a respect. I think everyone has their own thing. If you are not in favor, I would tell them nicely to stop it now.

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I don't like it. I never introduce my friends that way, that title is reserved for family, it means something special to me. I have a relative who refers to herself as aunt to her friends' kids and makes me feel as though she is taking something away from her real nieces and nephews.

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sorry for crashing but I am one of those friends that consider myself a fake Aunt to some of my friends kids. If the parents dont like it I wish they say something to me rather than just pretend they are OK. the longer they dont say something the worst I would feel when I figure it out. Please know that they say it not to impose but because they love your child as family and want your child to know that they can count on them as family too.

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I used to agree with you. There are a few people who refer to my husband and I as "aunt ali" or "uncle steve" to their kids even though we're not. I always thought it was slightly odd for the reasons you mentioned above.

HOWEVER, my good friend Nicole has been a life saver for us. We don't really have any help with my son as far as babysitting. She has LOVED babysitting him from day 1. She offers all the time, she comes to hang out with him just because, takes him out to dinner and he adores her.

She has become "aunt nicole" and totally deserves the title for all that she's done for us.

No i wouldn't give that title out for anyone, but she without a doubt deserves it.

Sometimes family isn't all it's cracked up to be and you have to make your own 'family.'

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My best frien is auntie and my dh best friend is uncle. The real aunts are just aunt. My best friend is a better aunt to my kids than most of their real aunts so she deserves this title. With everybody else, I think they got the hint as the years went on and I would say, go give so and so a kiss hello. Just make it clear like that and in cards, etc. They'll get the hint.

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Thanks for the responses. It's interesting two see how varied everyone's view is on this. I should probably clarify our family situation, since some of you mentioned it. I have 4 siblings, 3 of whom are married or engaged. And my husband has one brother. So that's 8 actual aunts and uncles right there. They all live pretty close by and we see them all very regularly. We're a very close family. The friends that have called themselves aunt uncle see my kids maybe 1-5 times a year. They're great people and all, but just not very involved in our kids' lives, so it doesn't make sense to me and I think could be confusing for them.

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I think it depends.

For some people, it's a cultural thing. Parents' friends, cousins, or other important adults are all given the title. For other people, their families are very small or kind of suck and their friends take on familial roles.

I'm like you, where I have a bunch of siblings and DH has a sister, so DD has two aunts and three uncles. MIL is one of four, so DD has a whole bunch of great aunts and uncles too. I don't know what I'm going to have my DD call our friends. On one hand, I could see it getting confusing. On the other, I hope that my DD realizes that you don't have to be related to someone in order for them to be part of your family.

Re: "Fake" aunts and uncles

Posted by MrsFlatbread

Posted by MrsW2010

sometimes friends are closer than family...and its a respect thing for me... to each their own, if you dont like it then put a stop to it

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Re: "Fake" aunts and uncles

I grew up witha very small blood family so my godmother, godfather, grandmother's friends, mom's friends etc were all Aunt or Uncle.

I married into a bigger family now so DD has many aunts and uncles for real but my bff's are still called Aunt as a sign of closeness and respect. They would be crushed if DD called them by their first names or Mrs.

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some of our close friends are called aunt and uncles. DH and I each only have one brother and my brother passed away in August. So my DD really has no aunts and uncles to call, except for his brother who barely is around. So i think its nice that she will have a few people to call Aunt and Uncle.

With that said i dont except my friends to have thier kids call us aunt and Uncle. I would let them decided and be ok with whatever it is.

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Mo, unfort. I dont have any siblings, but a few very close friends. We call them Aunt and Uncle infront of Matthew, and he will be calling them that...bc they are very close friends to us.....

Growing up as a child, I didnt have any aunts or uncles on my fathers side, and i called a few couples aunt and uncle bc they were very close family friends....

It totally depends on you and your hubby......if you both have big families.....i would just have your little guys call them by their first name....personally im not into the whole Mr & Mrs thing...

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I have no problem with it at all.
My closest friends are my kids "aunts" and "uncles".
They are the world to me and deserve it.