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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

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pumpkinmom
LIF Adult

Member since 5/12

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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

Third grade would be in a year for my oldest and I don't think she'll be ready for that.

Posted 10/3/19 6:01 PM
 
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BargainMama
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Member since 5/09

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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

Posted by NervousNell

I think the issue too is when you say- let themselves in- that implies they are getting off the bus, walking from the bus stop, entering the house with a key.
God forbid some crazy saw them walking alone and followed them, etc.
No effing way.
Not in 3rd grade.

That's a lot different then leaving them in the house for 15 min or so to run out real quick IMO




My thoughts exactly! I don't worry so much about the child getting into something. But, exactly what you said!

Posted 10/3/19 7:46 PM
 

FirstMate
My lil cowboy

Member since 10/10

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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

I think it depends on your child. I would, yes. So long as I knew a neighbor was around in the event of an emergency. I have to bring my DS to school before my 3rd grader even wakes up. He has been begging me to leave him home. I tried it out this week and he has been fine. I'm gone for literally 5 minutes but he knows my number and my neighbors are home if there is an emergency.

Posted 10/3/19 10:52 PM
 

Mrs213
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Member since 2/09

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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

There are many factors to consider here, as there is no law stating any age a child can be left alone. Consider age and maturity first, and the length of time they are alone. Does your child have any cognitive delays or behavioral issues that would inhibit their ability to be aloneness for 15 minutes? Does your child know your phone number by heart, know who to call in an emergency? Is there a neighbor they can go to in an emergency? Do they know not to open the door to any strangers? Is 15 minutes really the max time and what will happen if you get stuck? Can your child easily contact you? These are the the things you need to consider.

Posted 10/4/19 5:49 AM
 

nycgirl
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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

Stay home solo for 15-30 minutes: sure... done this plenty of times

Have a house key & enter solo: probably not

But I’d consider it if I lived in apartment with someone I knew would be home close by or a house with a neighbor who would let my kid in.

I would actually be more worried of my house being a target for robbery if someone saw a small child entering solo, which I think is more likely than my kid being kidnapped.

Posted 10/4/19 7:00 AM
 

nycbuslady
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Member since 9/15

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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

My daughter started letting herself in and out of the house this past summer for camp -- the summer between 5th & 6th grade. She's fine, but she's 11. I think 3rd grade is a bit young, but you know your child best. You definitely need contingency plans in case your kid forgets the key. Mine forgot her key at camp once. But, the garage has a keypad and she knows the code, so she went in through the garage. If your front door has a keypad instead of a regular key, it would make things easier.

Posted 10/4/19 9:36 AM
 

mommywantsababy
LIF Adolescent

Member since 12/12

583 total posts

Name:
shh

is it ok for a 3rd grader....

Yes i would be-the bus stop is two houses down and she knows our neighbors if there was trouble.

Message edited 10/4/2019 3:11:41 PM.

Posted 10/4/19 3:11 PM
 

queensgal
Smile

Member since 4/09

3287 total posts

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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

No. But I was left alone A LOT as a very young kid and it has been damaging for me. I deal with major feelings of neglect and always feel alone.

I was left a lot longer than 15 mins (more like 3 hours) and started cooking dinner at age 7. I was also responsible for my younger brother.

So while my experience was different from your situation, it has damaged me and no, I would not leave a child that young alone. Maybe a 5th/6th grader but no, not 3rd grade.

Posted 10/4/19 6:17 PM
 

Chai77
Brighter days ahead

Member since 4/07

7364 total posts

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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

No, I would not do that. It's the letting himself in alone part that makes me nervous.

I don't even let my 5th grader let himself in alone. I watch him walk to and from the bus stop from the porch more bc I don't trust other people, not about him.

Posted 10/4/19 10:51 PM
 

MrsS2005
Mom of 3

Member since 11/05

13118 total posts

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B

Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

I wouldn’t feel comfortable with that. I’m not even sure I’d be okay with leaving a third grader at home for 15 minutes by himself or herself. My sixth grader is pretty responsible and comes home by himself now, but I probably wouldn’t have done that any earlier even if it was only for 15 minutes.

Posted 10/5/19 7:07 PM
 

Hopefulmama
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Member since 4/14

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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

I wouldn’t be comfortable with this but if you HAD to, can you get him a cell phone and track him and/or call him as soon as he is off the bus and stay on the phone until he is indoors? Any crazies out there might be deterred by seeing him on the phone. Not the same situation but I have an autistic child who I track with a gps and it provides a lot of relief. Good luck!

Message edited 10/6/2019 8:53:39 AM.

Posted 10/6/19 8:53 AM
 

lululu
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Member since 7/05

9506 total posts

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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

Our school district requires an adult to meet them at the bus until 4th grade so it wouldn't be an option for me. 4th grade, depending on the kid, I would do it. And I leave my 6th grader home with my 2nd grader for up to an hour now if it's daytime.

Posted 10/6/19 9:07 AM
 

ml110
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

5435 total posts

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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

i have a 3rd grader- he'll be 9 in a couple weeks. i feel like i MIGHT be ok leaving him for 15 minutes while i run to pick up a pizza or some other super quick errand. (Although I haven't actually done that yet....)
When hes home, hes always just sitting on his iPad anyway... and he knows how to use it to text me, and knows how to use the house phone to call me (knows my number, and DHs number...)
BUT i feel like letting him get off the bus by himself is different. Too many variables- like the key not working for him to get in, he wouldn't have a phone or any way to get in touch with me if he couldn't get in... that kind of stuff.

Posted 10/6/19 9:13 AM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

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..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

Posted by ml110

i have a 3rd grader- he'll be 9 in a couple weeks. i feel like i MIGHT be ok leaving him for 15 minutes while i run to pick up a pizza or some other super quick errand. (Although I haven't actually done that yet....)
When hes home, hes always just sitting on his iPad anyway... and he knows how to use it to text me, and knows how to use the house phone to call me (knows my number, and DHs number...)
BUT i feel like letting him get off the bus by himself is different. Too many variables- like the key not working for him to get in, he wouldn't have a phone or any way to get in touch with me if he couldn't get in... that kind of stuff.



Or knowing my daughter, she'd lose or misplace the key...

Posted 10/6/19 9:24 PM
 

Aries14
Can't plan life...

Member since 8/08

2860 total posts

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is it ok for a 3rd grader....

nope!! way too young.

Posted 10/7/19 9:55 AM
 

2BadSoSad
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12

6791 total posts

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Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

NO WAY!

Message edited 10/7/2019 10:19:29 AM.

Posted 10/7/19 10:19 AM
 

alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!

Member since 5/09

18388 total posts

Name:
Allison

is it ok for a 3rd grader....

I was out running on Sunday and my DH left DS home when he ran out to get coffee. My DS is 7. We ask DS if he wants to come or stay. Lately it’s stay and is about 15 mins.

Posted 10/7/19 3:12 PM
 

phoenix913
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

3034 total posts

Name:
V

Re: is it ok for a 3rd grader....

I've been leaving my oldest alone while I pick up my younger ones since last year. He's in 3rd grade this year. He's very mature and knows to just watch tv and ignore the door and phone. I don't worry at all.

I haven't had him let himself in though. Our house is the bus stop, so I'd probably do it, but we just haven't needed to yet.

Posted 10/7/19 5:12 PM
 
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