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CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)
Member since 5/05 19978 total posts
Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...
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Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
Was it hard not having your family near by? What about your shower, etc?
We are considering moving down to SC and my mom is very upset.....she thinks she will never see her grand kids...I told her if we don't move I will never see my own kids bc I will have to work 60 hrs a week to pay for day care!! 
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Posted 5/21/06 7:59 PM  |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
In one word - Yes, but you learn to manage. I can't tell you how jealous I am of my friends who have grandma and grandpa close by to help. To boot, I had an especially difficult, "collicky" baby, so there were times that I nearly jumped out the window, and I can't tell you how helpful it would have been to have grandma stop by to take over for an hour or two while I napped. But, I made a new family - all of my close, close friends, who visit often and help me in the throes of motherhood. My good friend even threw my shower.
I won't lie, it's hard, but you grow stronger together as a couple because of it, and you form very strong bonds with your friends, and you make it work.
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| Posted 5/21/06 8:20 PM |
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yankinmanc
Happy Days!
Member since 8/05 18208 total posts
Name:
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
Posted by Bxgell2
In one word - Yes, but you learn to manage. I can't tell you how jealous I am of my friends who have grandma and grandpa close by to help. To boot, I had an especially difficult, "collicky" baby, so there were times that I nearly jumped out the window, and I can't tell you how helpful it would have been to have grandma stop by to take over for an hour or two while I napped. But, I made a new family - all of my close, close friends, who visit often and help me in the throes of motherhood. My good friend even threw my shower.
I won't lie, it's hard, but you grow stronger together as a couple because of it, and you form very strong bonds with your friends, and you make it work.
I would agree completely, I live in a different country than all my family and you do learn to cope. The one downfall for me, is that I am so stubborn and when friends offer to help me, I am often hesitant to take them on and often say, no I am fine on my own. My one piece of advice is that when someone says, let me come over and take the baby for a few hours...LET THEM.
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| Posted 5/21/06 8:39 PM |
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
I am in the same boat as you. Part of me is very happy because it allows me be a SAHM but the other part of me is upset that I wont have my parents close by (they are 5 minutes from me now). We are moving to Jersey which isn't far but it is still about an hour and half to two hours from them. My mother was devasted when we told her and cried every time she was on the phone with me and tried to make me feel guilty. She also pulled the I wont see my grandkids bit. She came around and my dad keeps telling her that we have to live our life. Now she is ok with it and says that we have to make it a point to see each other at least once a month.
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| Posted 5/21/06 8:42 PM |
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btrflygrl
me and baby #3!
Member since 5/05 12013 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
It's manageable....it's tough though, there are times when I'm completely overwhelmed. I went to NY for one shower, had a small one in GA (it was SO thrown together...)
Our families came when she was born to help out and we get to see them often enough. We're not ones to be heavily involved with our families, close, but not overly involved.
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| Posted 5/21/06 9:08 PM |
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Texas4Good
My Boys
Member since 6/05 1019 total posts
Name:
Anne
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
Posted by MrsTC
Was it hard not having your family near by? What about your shower, etc?
We are considering moving down to SC and my mom is very upset.....she thinks she will never see her grand kids...I told her if we don't move I will never see my own kids bc I will have to work 60 hrs a week to pay for day care!!
We had moved to Texas just 1 month before DS was born and he is on my side the 1st Grandson. My Mom was really sad, but since his birth, she has come down to visit 3 times already and is coming to stay for the Month of July.
Yes, it is hard not having all our family & friends in arms reach. But you adjust and the people you live near become like family to you and you make new friends.
If we were to con't living in NY, we both would have to work and the baby would be in day care. Since we moved here, I have been able to be a "SAHM" which has been wonderful. I just love being able to see my son grow and can't wait to have another one soon.
In today's world, you have to live for "you" and do what's right for you & DH. If you move, like I said... your family will visit and you can always fly back to visit them too. All the best to you! FM if you need someone to talk to, who has been there... 
OH- about the "shower", you can still have one. Either by going back to NY for one and making it a "Gift Card" type of gift giving or better yet, have the gifts shipped. They even have live internet showers now, so don't stress over that.
Anne
Message edited 5/22/2006 12:06:56 AM.
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| Posted 5/22/06 12:04 AM |
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-Laurie-
Hi!
Member since 5/05 2536 total posts
Name:
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
We moved numerous times after the wedding. Not by choice but because the USAF made us.
We are in Florida, my parents moved from LI to NC and my inlaws are in Philly.
For my shower we drove up at 30 weeks and had it in PA and everyone drove in from NY, NJ, PA and NC. I flew home and Dh drove all the baby's loot back to Florida.
When Jack was born luckily it was around memorial day weekend. We worked out that my parents got the first weekend-week and my inlaws got the second. My mom was on the phone with me when I was in labor and Dh spoke to his Mom. My MIL bought her flight and my Mom and Dad ended up jumping in there car and driving down after Jack was born they arrived a few hours after we were released from the hospital.
7-8 weeks later we planned his Baptism so everyone flew in or drove down for that and got to meet the baby.
since then my son has seen my parents about once every 5 weeks and my MIL about once every 2-3 months.
We did Christmas with my parents here, my inlaws for Thanksgiving.
Due to the powers of the internet and blue tooth both Grandma's saw photos and videos of Jack within minutes of his birth and then that was fowarded throughout the whole family within an hour.
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| Posted 5/22/06 9:52 AM |
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Calla
My girls
Member since 7/05 4303 total posts
Name:
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Re: Out of state moms...(those who relo'd out of NY)
Yes its hard not having family nearby, but living out of state was the right decision for us.
My shower was going to be at my moms and I was going to travel for it, but there was a big snow storm so it didn't happen. Oh well.
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| Posted 5/22/06 10:24 AM |
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