I put my friend back in prison

I feel like absolute poop. A friend of mine recently was released from prison. Thanks to me, he's going back. It wasn't supposed to happen...None of this was intentional.

I asked him if I could do something-because I wasn't sure if it would violate his parole. He said it was ok. So I did it. It was all my idea. He didn't ask me to do it, I asked him if I could. I used all his info.

In passing while he was at parole, someone asked him a question and he said yes, and mentioned what it was I did. He had already let the proper people know what it was that they needed to know-so he figured nothing of it. They asked him to wait there and a parole officer came out to speak with him and took him in a room. While he was waiting in there, 2 more parole officers came in with a warrant for his arrest...for violating parole.

He had his hearing the other day and he was sentenced to a year. His prior sentence was upstate so he's considered state property--now he has to go back upstate...He can't even remain on the island close to his family and friends.

The bottom line is that this is my fault. I know he said it was ok, but the reality of it is, that I did it. He knew the consequences of violating and he obeyed everything from his curfew, to friends, to work even going back to school. And something so petty and ridiculous that could have been avoided, is the reason for him to go back. Not to jail, but to prison...A place he just spent 5 years of his life...

I feel horrible. A part of me knows I shouldn't but the other part of me feels like I'm the reason he's going back. Because of me. I asked him how he could still want to talk to me...that he's there because I did this...

I feel like



ETA: to better clarify

Message edited 3/23/2009 8:03:54 PM.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

How could something you did violate someone else's parole? I'm lost

Re: I put my friend back in prison

I'm confused. How is it that he violated the terms of his parole by something you did? Or was he with you when you did whatever it was you did?

Re: I put my friend back in prison

I put his name on it.

and because of that--his name being attached to it-- it's a violation.

Message edited 3/23/2009 8:03:04 PM.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Well, I see how you're feeling badly however he knew the terms of his parole and had to have known that whatever it is you put his name on was in violation.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Re: I put my friend back in prison

He didn't know. When they gave him the "rules" of parole, this particular thing wasn't on it. If it was-- I wouldn't have done it. I read his paperwork when he was released... I checked everything out. There was no way I was letting him go back.

I guess this was considered a "Loophole"

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Re: I put my friend back in prison

well again, the terms of parole are pretty clear so I don't see how he didn't know he was violating his parole.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Well, not that I really have any info to go on, but it sounds like that's pretty nuts that he is in jail for his name being on something. I'd feel awful if I were you, too. Wish I could say something different, but that's the truth.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Re: I put my friend back in prison

I am totally confused but sorry you feel so bad.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

I am totally confused also.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Is there anything that you can do to get your friend released, or will it implicate you for what you did?

Re: I put my friend back in prison

i would think that there is a reason you didnt use YOUR info and IMO without knowing what the heck you were doing, if it was enough to get your friend sent back upstate, YOU shouldnt have been doing it either which is probably why you used his name and not your own (which makes me think thats why you're feeling guilty). Here's me being judgmental because I dont have all the facts to base an informed opinion on

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Posted by Domino

i would think that there is a reason you didnt use YOUR info and IMO without knowing what the heck you were doing, if it was enough to get your friend sent back upstate, YOU shouldnt have been doing it either which is probably why you used his name and not your own (which makes me think thats why you're feeling guilty). Here's me being judgmental because I dont have all the facts to base an informed opinion on

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Posted by Domino

i would think that there is a reason you didnt use YOUR info and IMO without knowing what the heck you were doing, if it was enough to get your friend sent back upstate, YOU shouldnt have been doing it either which is probably why you used his name and not your own (which makes me think thats why you're feeling guilty). Here's me being judgmental because I dont have all the facts to base an informed opinion on

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Posted by Domino

i would think that there is a reason you didnt use YOUR info and IMO without knowing what the heck you were doing, if it was enough to get your friend sent back upstate, YOU shouldnt have been doing it either which is probably why you used his name and not your own (which makes me think thats why you're feeling guilty). Here's me being judgmental because I dont have all the facts to base an informed opinion on

Re: I put my friend back in prison

This is written so cryptically, I don't even get it! But I'm sorry things turned out this way...

Re: I put my friend back in prison

I'm lost. Why didn't you just use your name? Sounds like it was illegal to begin with so while he was insane to say yes you shouldn't have put him or any friend in that position. Sorry sounds harsh but it is the truth. Unless I am missing something completely.

Re: I put my friend back in prison

Re: I put my friend back in prison

I agree with Jen and Domino - I reread what you wrote - if this wasn't shady to begin with, no one would have gotten in trouble...

Re: I put my friend back in prison

it's not a case of identity theft or me not wanting to use my name. It was for him. It was his "thing". I did it for him instead of him doing it. It was nothing illegal in everyday life.. This particular thing just happened to violate his parole apparently. It was supposed to be fun.

The bottom line is- hes going back to jail because of me and I feel like sshhiiiit because of it.