Doing the deed

So much pressure..we both know tonight is the night (among a few) to git er done.

How do you deal with the pressure?

I want to make it all romantic but then it gives you too much time to think.

Better to just do it?

Re: Doing the deed

I try to make it fun, even though its only for one purpose. Gotta put in a little extra effort I think. If you just do it, then its not enough to get you mind off of the purpose.

I can say this because after 2 IVF and hardly any BD, its become fun and good again.

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from a male POV, all i can say is, don't attack him when he comes through the door

don't remind him and harp on the fact that tonight is the night, don't act all annoyed if he isn't ready willing and able to proceed at a moment's notice.

try to let it happen as naturally as possible, as you usually do, as if you weren't TTC'ing

And, if for some reason, he can't rise to it tonight, because of illness or the pressure, don't make a big deal out of it.

The whole thing sux as it is - making the man feel like a simple means to an end only adds to it

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ITA - I try not to tell DH anything about my monthly cycle. Though he admitted to me yesterday that he totally knows what I'm up to I thought I was being so clever.

Good luck later.

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Posted by BA2008

ITA - I try not to tell DH anything about my monthly cycle. Though he admitted to me yesterday that he totally knows what I'm up to I thought I was being so clever.

Good luck later.

Message edited 7/8/2008 4:18:15 PM.

Re: Doing the deed

Posted by BA2008

ITA - I try not to tell DH anything about my monthly cycle. Though he admitted to me yesterday that he totally knows what I'm up to I thought I was being so clever.

Good luck later.

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good luck tonight and have fun!!!!

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I wanted to share our experience with all of you.

In my mind, here's how things are supposed to go: I wake up at the a**-crack of dawn for 3 sonos, I take the Clomid, I deal with the hot flashes, I get the injection of Ovidrel in the upper thigh...and DH just has to do ONE THING. I thought it was foolproof.

What Don said up there is totally the truth. We were given a STRICT BD schedule to adhere to, and in my mind, this was going to be easy. Well, DH was SO stressed out that nothing happened during those first two days. I know I was supposed to be the supportive spouse, but I was too hurt and angry. As I said, in MY mind, he just had to do one thing.

Funny thing is, when we sat down and talked that night, I told him that I was sorry I pressured him, and that this month was a wash, and why don't we just deal with it. Well, we wound up making love that night--I would say we BD'd but we didn't--that was the furthest thing from our minds. We wound up conceiving, by the grace of God. I will never understand how.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's so easy to put pressure on them to get the job done, and I know *I* didn't realize how stressful that was. So for me, in the end, being supportive and talking it through was what worked for us.

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we are trying without any assistance at this point. I was just hoping to give ourselves the best chance with perfect timing and quanity. It never seems to work out.

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Just want to give you some hugs and wish you luck!

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Well, how did last night go?

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Posted by QuoteTheRaven424

Posted by Blu-ize

Posted by BA2008

Well, how did last night go?

It went great! We're trying to figure out how it can happen again in the next 24 hours. Tonight I will get home very late but told him to take uppers so he could stay up. Tomorrow night is good too I guess but I think it may be too late.

I got another egg on my CBEFM this morning. Two eggs in one week?

take uppers?

hope that's safe

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I will say that my right side is aching still. My right ovary usually gives me pain during O.

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i know what you mean - it totally takes the fun out!

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so tomorrow even though I think it's too late, we are both cancelling our after work plans and going home.

Also hopefully tonight we won't be too tired.