What can I do? (LONG)

Things are very tough on DH for this last month. Since we just closed on our new place he's been painting and cleaning. I've been on modified bedrest and am in quite a bit of pain. The carpal tunnel is so bad that I keep dropping things, so I can't even do the dang dishes anymore. He's not even sleeping because I keep him up. He ends up going to the couch.

I'm frustrated because I see all that he needs to do, but I'm also frustrated that he waited until the last minute. I packed up almost all my stuff in the 7th month because I knew things would get physically harder. I begged him to pack. He said he'd have time after we close. But I knew after we close he would have to do a bunch of work on the new place so we could move in.

I know I am doing something very important, but I feel like I'm helpless. I haven't seen him smile in about 2 weeks. He says he'll be okay once we offically move. Is there anything I can do for him?

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

There isnt much because you are on bedrest but I wanted to give you some

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

yeah, not much you can do, you need to take care of yourself! Maybe you can find someone to help him?

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

Sorry to hear that things are stressful for your DH now... although I am sure they make things stressful for you too!

Since you aren't really able to help him, maybe you could help him organize what needs to be done. I know that when I make a list it always helps me stay focused on the task at hand. If I don't have a list, I end up starting 10 different things and never finishing any of them.

Maybe suggest writing down everything that needs to be accomplished, and putting them in order of priority. Then he can start checking things off and it makes you feel as though you are really getting somewhere. That's all that comes to mind for now... that and seeing if there is anyone who can help him.

Here are some hugs for you!

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

I wish somebody could help. We don't know people on LI and our families don't live too close.

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

I'm so sorry Kelly. I know you must feel frustrated because you want to help him. Do some moving companies help with packing? Maybe you can cook him his favorite meal at least to get him to a smile even a little. I wish I could help you!

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

I hear ya. I've been feeling really bad for my DH as well because there is soooo much to do that I cannot do now without his help we end up spending all his free time preparing baby stuff. He works really long hours on top of that and I know he is just so exhausted. I am not working and I feel sooooo guilty about it!

I try to get other people to help me out as much as possible (my mom mostly) and I just read that you have no one around

Its hard but just keep telling him how much you and the baby appreciate him and what a great father and husband he is! And, you've been cooking his baby for the past 9 mos plus so its his turn

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

I feel the same way, but maybe on a lesser scale. My activities are so restricted from my breathing problems. DH works horrendous hours, does most of the household chores, is working on some home renovations and does some work for me at my business. I was thinking maybe I could just get him a gift or something, as I can't physically do much more than I am. That's the only idea I have right now.

Message edited 8/13/2007 11:58:44 AM.

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

what i notice with my DH is that he is stressing with the baby almost near i am thinking your DH is doing the same Kelly,

Just let him be, remember they want to be in control as much as they can, and do not kn ow what is ahead as we dont either.

you can only do as much as you can so dont stress yourself out bc its not healthy for youa nd the baby.

does your DH like beer maybe buy him a 6 pack to calm him or take him out to a nice resturant that he likes.

hang in there call me if you need to vent im here for you

Re: What can I do? (LONG)

This is a tough one, but maybe you can order takeout from his favorite place and have it waiting for him when he comes home???

Re: What can I do? (LONG)