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singlemom
LIF Zygote
Member since 4/07 3 total posts
Name:
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xpost from NFR
any help??
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Posted 4/14/07 4:30 PM  |
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Moehick
Ready for the sun!
Member since 5/05 30339 total posts
Name:
Properly perfect™
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Re: xpost from NFR
First off I am so sorry you are going through this
I would consult your lawyer to make sure you get all you are entitled to....that being said my brother is divorced and he....
Pays child support
Pays for the childrens education (they go to private school)
Pays for their medical which includes all medications, co payments, etc
He pays for extra curricular activities (soccer, dance, etc)
Splits all school related expenses with the mother
Message edited 4/14/2007 4:35:38 PM.
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| Posted 4/14/07 4:35 PM |
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smith1234
Little Angel
Member since 10/05 1745 total posts
Name:
Kristi
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Re: xpost from NFR
I don't really have any advice for you, but I wanted to offer some ! I'm really sorry you are going through this.
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| Posted 4/14/07 4:36 PM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: xpost from NFR
I am an atty but I am not permitted to give advice in a forum like this. My only advice would be to make sure you hire a good attorney. And after that you should not have to worry about what to ask for b/c they know what to look for and they will take care of all of that for you.
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| Posted 4/14/07 4:38 PM |
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WoodIAm
My Boys!
Member since 5/05 5498 total posts
Name:
JoAnne
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Re: xpost from NFR
I also wish I had some advice for you but all I can give are
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| Posted 4/14/07 4:56 PM |
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singlemom
LIF Zygote
Member since 4/07 3 total posts
Name:
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Re: xpost from NFR
thanks....I know I should use an atty but he wants to go thru a mediator. Any thoughts?
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| Posted 4/14/07 8:18 PM |
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Moehick
Ready for the sun!
Member since 5/05 30339 total posts
Name:
Properly perfect™
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by singlemom
thanks....I know I should use an atty but he wants to go thru a mediator. Any thoughts?
Personally I think you should seek legal counsel to know everything (things you haven't even thought of) that needs to be figured out in regards to your child
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| Posted 4/14/07 9:25 PM |
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FeliciaDP
♥
Member since 5/05 18599 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: xpost from NFR
no advice, I'm sorry .. I ,just wanted to send some support and lots of
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| Posted 4/14/07 9:28 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by singlemom
thanks....I know I should use an atty but he wants to go thru a mediator. Any thoughts?
MY friend used a mediator - which was fine for the beginning. A mediator looks at both sides & is supposed to be an impartial person.
When it came time to sign papers, she consulted with another attorney, who had soley her interest. He explained that she could get a lot more with child support, etc. She opted to let it go since "you can't get blood from a stone."
If you want recommendations on who she used, I can try to find out for you. One thing about the mediator - he failed to file paperwork taking her DH off of the house. When it came time to refinance, it was a nightmare. She discovered her ex DH's creditors had put a lien on the house.
Good luck with everything. I know it's hard to mix emotions with finances. Try to keep them as separate as possible & see a good attorney.
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| Posted 4/14/07 9:35 PM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by nrthshgrl
MY friend used a mediator - which was fine for the beginning. A mediator looks at both sides & is supposed to be an impartial person.
When it came time to sign papers, she consulted with another attorney, who had soley her interest. He explained that she could get a lot more with child support, etc. She opted to let it go since "you can't get blood from a stone."
I completely agree. You can go through mediator, but don't sign anything until an attorney has reviewed it.
I am so sorry you are going through this
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| Posted 4/14/07 9:52 PM |
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dawnygirl25
Growing up soo fast..
Member since 1/06 14917 total posts
Name:
Dawn
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Re: xpost from NFR
I do not have ay advice but wanted to send some hugs your way. I am so sorry you are going through this.
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| Posted 4/14/07 10:07 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by dawnygirl25
I do not have ay advice but wanted to send some hugs your way. I am so sorry you are going through this.
me too
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| Posted 4/14/07 10:57 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by Moehick
Posted by singlemom
thanks....I know I should use an atty but he wants to go thru a mediator. Any thoughts?
Personally I think you should seek legal counsel to know everything (things you haven't even thought of) that needs to be figured out in regards to your child
I definitely agree.
When my mom got divorced she was so overwhelmed with everything that she just let my dad make the arrangements. Not sure if they used a mediatior or an attorney but let's just say she got screwed and in the end my dad never lived up to his end of any of it.
Definitely get and attorney and protect yourself and your child's future. It's don't have to be ugly you just have to put yourself and your child first.
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| Posted 4/14/07 11:09 PM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: xpost from NFR
I agree with the others... while mediation can be very productive for some, it also has a tendency of distracting you from all that you are entitled to. If there's ANY hint of adversity in the divorce, I would go through an attorney to make sure your rights are totally covered - always keep in mind that the mediator has BOTH interests in mind - there's no one working 100% for your interests, and your interests only. While some divorce attorneys are a little too zealous in their representation, and that's what leads some to mediation, there are plenty of others who are ethical and respectful. At the very least, if you use mediation, make sure you have an attorney reviewing all the documents, and giving final approval 
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| Posted 4/15/07 8:52 AM |
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2girlsforme
LIF Adult
Member since 8/06 3071 total posts
Name:
XXXXXXXXX
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by Bxgell2
I agree with the others... while mediation can be very productive for some, it also has a tendency of distracting you from all that you are entitled to. If there's ANY hint of adversity in the divorce, I would go through an attorney to make sure your rights are totally covered - always keep in mind that the mediator has BOTH interests in mind - there's no one working 100% for your interests, and your interests only. While some divorce attorneys are a little too zealous in their representation, and that's what leads some to mediation, there are plenty of others who are ethical and respectful. At the very least, if you use mediation, make sure you have an attorney reviewing all the documents, and giving final approval
I'm a lawyer too and I couldn't agree more!!! (or said it better)
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| Posted 4/15/07 10:11 AM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: xpost from NFR
Posted by 2girlsforme
Posted by Bxgell2
I agree with the others... while mediation can be very productive for some, it also has a tendency of distracting you from all that you are entitled to. If there's ANY hint of adversity in the divorce, I would go through an attorney to make sure your rights are totally covered - always keep in mind that the mediator has BOTH interests in mind - there's no one working 100% for your interests, and your interests only. While some divorce attorneys are a little too zealous in their representation, and that's what leads some to mediation, there are plenty of others who are ethical and respectful. At the very least, if you use mediation, make sure you have an attorney reviewing all the documents, and giving final approval
I'm a lawyer too and I couldn't agree more!!! (or said it better)
I'd definitely second or rather third this!
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| Posted 4/15/07 3:57 PM |
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