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sorry edited for lurking SIL

Message edited 9/20/2005 7:16:07 AM.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

Oh boy, why would he say that!!!!!!! Even if it is true!!!!!!! Men seriously do not think- ok well the cats out of the bag.
In all honestly I would stay there , especially now. I dont think your DH really fully understood the consequences for you by telling that to his father. Now all of his family thinks your nuts probably confirming any not so nice thoughts they had of you for not really having a relationship with you. I think you will end it by staying over there. I understand your fear too but now this poor guy prob feels worse about his health and condition and what his family thinks of him. No one wants to hear they are feared in such a terrible way and he cant help what he is going through. Let me ask you , you said Leos other family members stay there- have they ever been in danger? Have they ever given or said they were not safe staying there? They seem to stay there a lot for a place that you dont think is safe. Feel it out, and see if you can see yourself staying there.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

thanks for your views

Message edited 9/19/2005 7:39:49 PM.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

Personally, I wouldn't stay there - I would feel too uncomfortable. Being that your DH has no desire to stay there either, you aren't doing anyone a favor. I agree with Leo - if the FIL is already mad at you, then there is nothing else to lose.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

I would stay in a hotel and simply say that you will both be more comfortable there, period. I wouldn't keep trying to explain anything. If you are still invited, go for dinner or whatever and then back to the hotel.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

thanks, my FIL is going to try not to be mad at me, but I know he holds a grudge. Leo hates staying there. It is boring at his house, and we have a lot of friends in Tampa. I told him we will always visit, but at night stay at our friend's house. I can tell he is angry, but he said he is going to try and pray that he gets better. It breaks my heart because he can't control it, but I really don't feel safe at all.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

Message edited 9/19/2005 4:08:37 PM.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

OMG , if you think that he may hurt you even more now ,then DO NOT stay there, i didnt know he hated you. Yikes, then no, I wouldnt stay there, sorry I missed that in your post , I thought I read that he was the only 1 nice to you in leo's family. You know it is what it is now, so either he will accept it and you guys have a wonderful thanksgiving or he doesnt and you guys stay here and have a wonderful thanksgiving, either way YOU will have a wonderful thanksgiving!

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

yeah I should have said he is the only one in Leo's family who has not taken money from me, so in my book that makes him the nicest.

Re: Instead of PreCana with your FH, you should have to go to consuling with your future ILS

Posted by Janice

yeah I should have said he is the only one in Leo's family who has not taken money from me, so in my book that makes him the nicest.