what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I know we've discussed people registering for housewarming parties before and we all pretty much agree that it's tacky. Well I just got invited to one of a gay acquaintance of mine. First of all I think it's kind of odd I was even invited, I used to work with this guy (like 6 years ago) and recently saw him at a mutual friend's bbq and now I'm invited to a party where I'm expected to bring a gift.
Anyway, I mentioned it to our mutual friend and she didn't see much of a problem with him registering. She brought up the point that since they're gay, it's not like he'll ever have the opportunity to have a bridal shower. I guess I can kind of see that, but I still don't feel like it's right.
I'm not planning on going to the party because it's a week after my due date, but now I'm wondering if I should send a gift. Maybe something small from the registry, or maybe just a bottle of wine. Would you bother sending a gift?

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I wouldn't

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

If you really haven't seen this guy in years and don't intend to be friends, I woudln't bother with the gift.

I don't think it's really weird because chances are they aren't going to have a bridal shower,e tc. I think the housewarming registry is only bad becausew most of these people ahve already registered for engagement parties, showers and weddings.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I'll say NOT TACKY at all.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I agree that they are not having a bridal shower and if they are not having a commitment ceremony than why should they be left out. I always swore that if I wasn't married by 35, gthen @#$% I was registering. I always said, "Just because I'm single why should I eat off of mismatched plates"

What I do find odd is that you haven't seen him for 6 years so that is why I wouldn't attend and wouldn't send a gift.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I would send alittle something and a note. Unless I really felt he was just inviting me for a gift. Then I wouldn't do anything. It just seems odd, 6 years without seeing him and now you get an invite. I'm very leary of those things.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I agree that you don't need to send anything, but I think registering is acceptable.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

Message edited 10/5/2006 12:25:34 PM.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

Nah, I wouldn't send anything. It'd be one thing if he was a close friend but he seems like he's not even on the level of a casual aquaintance. Keep your money girl!

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I wouldn't. It's not like you really keep in touch with this person. And it's not a wedding, it's a house warming.

I wouldn't worry about it.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I wouldn't send a gift if this is someone you're not really friends with.

As far as the registry, I don't think it's tacky. If I were going to the party I would be grateful that the registry is there (as long as there are things on there in my price range). It makes gift giving so much easier and reduces the need for him to return anything.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

Well, I would think of it this way....would you buy a straight friend a gift off a registry if she were moving in with her boyfriend and having a housewarming party? Whatever your answer is, that is what I would use as a guide.

If one of my gay friends was having a commitment ceremony and registered, I would buy something from a registry. To me, moving in with someone and having a housewarming party is not the same thing.

ETA: and if you aren't that close with him, I wouldn't worry too much about it at all.

Message edited 10/5/2006 12:56:25 PM.

Re: what do you think- tacky or acceptable

I think it's more about your relationship with this person, as opposed to whether buying a gift off the registry is tacky or not.

Someone who you have not seen in 6 years-- then, all of a sudden run into-- it's not required that you go the extra mile and send a gift during a very busy time in your life.

However, if you'd like to make a small gesture-- i.e. send flowers the day of the party-- so they can be displayed, etc., I think that would be nice-- but it's a judgement call.