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Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
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thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
would i be wrong if i did the following:
buy my neighbors oldest daughter a back pack for school? the oldest one started 5th grade today, and the 2nd one started kindergarten today. when i said to brittany, the older one, yesterday "hey are you all ready for school." she says, sort of but i dont have a back pack yet. She went on to say that her dad (stepdad) said she can use the recycle shopping bag from shoprite as her bookbag b/c they're stylish. (and when i saw them walking down the block, thats pretty much what she was carrying..one of those market bags.) Im pretty sure they bought the little one a new bag for kindergarten. that **** broke my heart. (I've mentioned these folks before..the mom is recovering alchoholic and the dad is her stepdad..he is father to the 3 other kids.) I feel like she's always getting the shaft and I have noticed that the dad treats her differently from the other kids. I have to get myself a new work bag tomorrow anyway and would get her a bag for school. nothing expensive either. just something girly. would that be wrong or overstepping??
you know how kids are with making fun of kids for **** like this.
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Posted 8/30/11 9:19 PM  |
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staceyd
LIF Adult
Member since 8/08 2052 total posts
Name:
stacey
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
I think that is such a sweet thing to do... But I would be nervous thinking about how the parents would feel... Are they going to be upset? Idk... I guess I'm not really a big help... But the way you tell the story about this family breaks my heart... And you are such a great person for wanting to help her! Maybe ask the mom? Is she at all approachable?
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| Posted 8/30/11 9:23 PM |
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Mags1227
Just a mommy ...
Member since 10/10 2665 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
i haven't read your previous posts, but even from what you wrote here, i get what you're feeling.
HOWEVER, since both parents ARE home i think this would be seen as overstepping. i'm with you and would want to give this little girl the world, but i'd ask the parents permission first.
do you have a child around her age? maybe you could say something like " DD got a brand new book bag form grandma but the one she used last year is still in good shape. i noticed (girl's name) admiring it and was wondering if i could give it to her as a gift?" then if they say yes, buy a new one, take off the tags, and try to "mess" it up just a little (i'd turn it inside out and back a few times) just so it looks used.
GL with whatever you decide!
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| Posted 8/30/11 9:25 PM |
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Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
Posted by staceyd
I think that is such a sweet thing to do... But I would be nervous thinking about how the parents would feel... Are they going to be upset? Idk... I guess I'm not really a big help... But the way you tell the story about this family breaks my heart... And you are such a great person for wanting to help her! Maybe ask the mom? Is she at all approachable?
her mom is doing so much better with her recovery and really got her act together for the most part. She cant drive though b/c her license was revoked for a year. So its up to their dad to take them out shopping.
our kids play together and we're all friendly. so i was just going to be like, "i saw this on sale when i was buying my bag for work today and thought brittany could use it.." blah blah.
but i can see how that would be overstepping. ahhhhhhhhhh....
the older daughter is always asking to come over my house and do crafts and stuff; she asked to sleep over one day too. and i said she would have to talk to her mom about that one...lol.
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| Posted 8/30/11 9:34 PM |
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bpmom
Feeling Blessed
Member since 6/07 2963 total posts
Name:
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
Posted by Mags1227
do you have a child around her age? maybe you could say something like " DD got a brand new book bag form grandma but the one she used last year is still in good shape. i noticed (girl's name) admiring it and was wondering if i could give it to her as a gift?" then if they say yes, buy a new one, take off the tags, and try to "mess" it up just a little (i'd turn it inside out and back a few times) just so it looks used.
GL with whatever you decide!
I think this is a good idea.... GL!
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| Posted 8/30/11 10:45 PM |
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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
That is very sweet of you. I haven't read (or remember) other posts regarding your neighbors. If you have a bad relationship, I wouldn't add fuel to the fire. If you are civil neighbors, I'd go ahead and gift the girl.
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| Posted 8/30/11 10:56 PM |
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want2beamom
Love my boys soooo much!!!
Member since 8/06 10164 total posts
Name:
True love doesn't end with happily ever after...
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
you could always say that youhave an extra one from niece etc...just take the tags off if you think the parents would be upset...I think its an awesome thing that you are doing!!!
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| Posted 8/31/11 7:20 AM |
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bonch20
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 1290 total posts
Name:
Bonnie
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
Posted by bdmom
Posted by Mags1227
do you have a child around her age? maybe you could say something like " DD got a brand new book bag form grandma but the one she used last year is still in good shape. i noticed (girl's name) admiring it and was wondering if i could give it to her as a gift?" then if they say yes, buy a new one, take off the tags, and try to "mess" it up just a little (i'd turn it inside out and back a few times) just so it looks used.
GL with whatever you decide!
I think this is a good idea.... GL!
great idea! this is very sweet of you!
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| Posted 8/31/11 11:02 AM |
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pnbplus1
Family
Member since 5/09 5751 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
I think that if you bought one and wrapped it up and gave it to her as a back to school type gift, it would be ok. When you speak to the parents just make it seem really casual, maybe you can even say you bought it for a niece/cousin/ etc but she already had one and you lost the receipt, etc. Yes, a lie, but if it spares this little girl some embarrassment, well worth it.
I think it's great that you'd consider doing something like this. So sad when parents play favorites, especially when it involves stepchildren.
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| Posted 8/31/11 12:08 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name:
sara
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Re: thoughts..buying something for my neighbor's kid
I would buy one but make it seem like you got it from a friend whose daughter got two and she said you can keep it for your DD but you dont want to store any more stuff etc etc. I would not buy it and give it as a gift as they might be embarassed or see it as you overstepping the mark.
That is so sweet of you and I would want to do the exact same thing but I would be careful not to hurt anyones feelings along the way.
You are a GREAT neighbour
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| Posted 8/31/11 12:16 PM |
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