| Posted By |
Message |
Stacey1403
Where it all began....
Member since 5/05 24065 total posts
Name:
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THE LETTER...LMAO
THE LETTER...LMAO
Dear Wife:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've
been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
these last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
had quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a
new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of
silk boxers. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to
sleep after watching all of your soaps.
You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't want sex anymore or
anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore,
whatever the case is, I'm gone.
Your Ex-husband
PS Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to West
Virginia Together! Have a great life!
---------------------------------
Dear Ex-husband -
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true
that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a
far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown
out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work.
I did notice when you got a hair cut last week, the first thing that
came to mind was "You look just like a girl!" but my mother raised me not to
say anything if you can't say anything nice.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because
the price tag was still on them. I prayed that it was a coincidence
that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning .. and
your silk boxers were $49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out.
So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million
dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica . But when I got
home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer
said that with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me.
So take care.
Signed
Rich As Hell and Free!
PS I don't know if I ever told you this but Carla, my sister, was born Carl.
I hope that's not a problem
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Posted 4/28/07 7:38 PM  |
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Phyl
R.I.P. Sweet Mia ♥
Member since 5/06 28918 total posts
Name:
The Mystical Azzhorse! ™
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
 
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| Posted 4/28/07 7:57 PM |
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Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st
Member since 5/05 15287 total posts
Name:
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 8:02 PM |
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VirginiaDeb
Don't eat me, hippo!
Member since 5/05 9252 total posts
Name:
Deb
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 8:13 PM |
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Maathy317
Grammie's Little Man
Member since 2/06 3235 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 8:17 PM |
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Kidsaplenty
Sister love
Member since 2/06 5971 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 8:58 PM |
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MarathonKnitter
HAPPY
Member since 2/07 17374 total posts
Name:
EMBRACING CHANGE
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 9:00 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 9:07 PM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 9:47 PM |
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LuckySV
LIF Adult
Member since 10/05 4675 total posts
Name:
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 9:50 PM |
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CunningOne
***
Member since 5/05 26975 total posts
Name:
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 9:50 PM |
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evnme
My little lamb
Member since 8/05 12633 total posts
Name:
aka momma2b
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Re: THE LETTER...LMAO
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| Posted 4/28/07 10:55 PM |
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