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Stepmonster

Posted By Message

ricaim
LIF Adult

Member since 8/09

1201 total posts

Name:

Stepmonster

i got the book yesterday and could NOT put it down. The Him and Marriage chapters were the ones that effected me the most. DH thinks I am a tad odd when I say in my own way how our relationship needs to come first. It's not strong, our family is not strong. To see it in writing was uplifting.

Posted 7/23/10 6:04 AM
 

Bops
My 3 wishes

Member since 12/07

13625 total posts

Name:

Re: Stepmonster

I have that book as welll...Love it !

Posted 7/23/10 11:39 AM
 

Lucky2008
LIF Adult

Member since 5/08

1005 total posts

Name:
Chris

Re: Stepmonster

so true! Your marriage does need to come first - even with SC and bio-children - so many people disagree with that but don't realize how important and healthy it is for the children as well b/c that is the first thing that will start to fall apart if it is not put first.

Before I was married we knew another couple that were married for 27 years with 2 grown children - they used to act like they were high school sweethearts so in love, I asked the wife what her secret was and she told me point blank "we always put our relationship first and foremost" she then said that of course while the children were growing up if they needed or were sick etc. - that was priority but she said they always made time for them.

Just thought I would share that since I knew people that truly lived by that.

Posted 7/23/10 1:19 PM
 

1stimemom
Love my boys

Member since 2/08

8766 total posts

Name:
Mrs Dee

Re: Stepmonster

I really need to pick up this book!

Posted 7/23/10 4:59 PM
 

bellydancer
LIF Zygote

Member since 9/09

12 total posts

Name:
Suneydis

Re: Stepmonster

have any of your DH read this book? If so, what are their opinions? I am going to purchase it real soon and hope to pass it on to DH after I am done.

Posted 7/28/10 3:03 PM
 

ricaim
LIF Adult

Member since 8/09

1201 total posts

Name:

Re: Stepmonster

Posted by MrsBernabe

have any of your DH read this book? If so, what are their opinions? I am going to purchase it real soon and hope to pass it on to DH after I am done.



My DH said he was going to read it, but I don't know if he has. I heeded a pp's warning though because in the book some of the step-mom's had really challenging relationships with their SC and DH could have thought I hated DSS after reading the book.

I do not have a bad relationship with DSS (thank god)- so I let DH know that I connected with the book on other topics.
I didn't want him to think I thought so negatively of DSS, since that is not my experience.

Posted 7/28/10 5:08 PM
 

itkocak

Member since 7/07

7639 total posts

Name:

Re: Stepmonster

Message edited 11/27/2011 1:54:37 PM.

Posted 7/28/10 9:19 PM
 

ricaim
LIF Adult

Member since 8/09

1201 total posts

Name:

Re: Stepmonster

Posted by imthekevinofcindyandkevin

eta ~
i think it will pizz off quite a few dads if they read it. no one likes to have their faults pointed out. i know that's not the point of the book. i know the point is for step moms to realize that they are not alone but i get the felling a lot of men would feel attacked and disregard the entire concept.

FWIW



You are probably right.

Posted 7/29/10 9:12 AM
 

dfw343
LIF Infant

Member since 7/10

246 total posts

Name:

Re: Stepmonster

Posted by imthekevinofcindyandkevin

i've read it.

doesn't really apply because my daughter always had rules and structure. i wasn't that kind of divorced dad that let the kid run the show out of guilt or whatever.

but i can see that my situation is not the norm. i was a sahd and i was the one that set the rules and structure even before divorcing.

i do feel for those of you that are dealing with step children and husbands that aren't supportive and understanding.

i think a lot of what goes on is driven by guilt and fear that the birth mom will turn the child against them that a lot of dads just cave.

i wish all of you all the luck in the world. the statistics are staggering on the divorce rate among women marrying men with children.




eta ~
i think it will pizz off quite a few dads if they read it. no one likes to have their faults pointed out. i know that's not the point of the book. i know the point is for step moms to realize that they are not alone but i get the felling a lot of men would feel attacked and disregard the entire concept.

FWIW




Thanks for your honesty and keep posting here. I think us getting the man POV will help us a lot!

Posted 7/29/10 12:23 PM
 

bellydancer
LIF Zygote

Member since 9/09

12 total posts

Name:
Suneydis

Re: Stepmonster

Posted by dfw343

Posted by imthekevinofcindyandkevin

i've read it.

doesn't really apply because my daughter always had rules and structure. i wasn't that kind of divorced dad that let the kid run the show out of guilt or whatever.

but i can see that my situation is not the norm. i was a sahd and i was the one that set the rules and structure even before divorcing.

i do feel for those of you that are dealing with step children and husbands that aren't supportive and understanding.

i think a lot of what goes on is driven by guilt and fear that the birth mom will turn the child against them that a lot of dads just cave.

i wish all of you all the luck in the world. the statistics are staggering on the divorce rate among women marrying men with children.




eta ~
i think it will pizz off quite a few dads if they read it. no one likes to have their faults pointed out. i know that's not the point of the book. i know the point is for step moms to realize that they are not alone but i get the felling a lot of men would feel attacked and disregard the entire concept.

FWIW




Thanks for your honesty and keep posting here. I think us getting the man POV will help us a lot!



ITA! Getting a mans perspective is really great! Thank you!

Posted 7/29/10 2:07 PM
 

itkocak

Member since 7/07

7639 total posts

Name:

Re: Stepmonster

Message edited 11/27/2011 1:54:00 PM.

Posted 7/29/10 2:10 PM
 
 

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