Spinoff on putting 2nd child to bed

so the post on how to handle a 2nd child got me thinking.

Most posters stated that they put the LO down first and then put their older child down with as much of the same routine as they previously had.

This is what I do also.

With DS, we have a whole elaborate nighttime routine which involves bathtime, reading several books, singing, etc., and snuggling. This could be an hour to 1.5 hr process.

With DD, she gets bathed every other night, put into her PJs, and into her crib. And now at 9 mos I feel so guilty bc when DS was 9 mos, we already had his whole bedtime routine.

I feel so bad that DD is being shafted, but it is what it is.

DS loves, loves, loves books, which I attribute to us reading to him every night since he was 3 months old.

DD, not so much.

So, am I doing DD a disservice in not reading to her and snuggling with her?

If you have older kids, when were you able to start reading to them together and snuggling?

I hate that DD gets the short end of the stick!

Re: Spinoff on putting 2nd child to bed

For the first 6 months, I kept DS's bedtime routine while DH stayed with DD. Then I started to put them both down at the same time. We read books, then I turn on the lullaby sound spa.. I give DD her bottle while DS drinks his. DD usually falls asleep first, so I put her down and stay with DS til he falls asleep. While DD is more interested in eating the books I figure it's good to get the routine started already.

Re: Spinoff on putting 2nd child to bed

I feel the same way as you. My poor son doesn't get read to at night... he gets a really quick bath, followed by pjs, bottle and then sleep.

DD gets her bath, pjs, a little tv or stories, then she goes to bed and we sing songs and rub her back a bit... and if we deviate from that routine too much she'll scream and wake DS (they share a room).

I don't know how to change things, and since I work late a lot it's usually DH doing bedtime on his own so we really have to stick to what works.

Re: Spinoff on putting 2nd child to bed

When I put jessie down at night, I go in her room, grab 2 of her age appropriate books, sit on her floor with her and read through them twice.

The books are so short, we point things out...this probably takes 5 minutes.

then I put her down and she reads through the books till she falls asleep.

She was wrecking reading time for josh...since he is 4, the books I read to him don't interest her at all.

Re: Spinoff on putting 2nd child to bed

I have 2 DD's one is 4 and the other 20 months. They eat dinner and usually bath together. when DD#2 goes to bed. I read to her and put her down (during that time my other is either watching tv , coloring, on my iphone these days )
I usually take this time to eat. i then i snuggle with DD 1 for 20-30 mins. I read her a book and put her to bed.

I have to say yes my time was cut short on both ends at bedtime since i have 2 kids.. sometimes its like..how fast can i get them down because I AM DONE for the day but u can easily make up for it during the day

Re: Spinoff on putting 2nd child to bed

We got through different routines with Colin.
I always put him down first while DH hangs with Ryan - they watch the 8PM show and I bring Colin up a few minutes after 8.
Some nights we read a book, some nights we just rock for a few minutes. I try to spend 5 minutes before bed, just the two of us.
Then I go down and DH helps Ryan go to the bathroom, put on a pull up and I take him up for a book, snuggle, etc.

It all evens out somewhere - I wouldn't worry too much over it. Before you know it, they'll both be old enough to listen to a book together and retire to their own rooms.