| Posted By |
Message |
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Spinoff from Stephanie's post
If you think something is very outwardly tacky, would you let the person know?
I ask b/c sometimes NY etiquette is different (although in her case it is a NY wedding), and I wonder if the person really is clueless or just does not care about how they are presenting themselves.
For example, I was invited to an OOT wedding & gave what I would normally give at a NY wedding. Although my friend appreciated it, her family did not being that I gave the largest gift & was not family or in the BP. They talked amongst themselves about how tacky it was for me to show up the family, but I really had no clue. (I would have given the gift in pieces, like maybe 1/ 2 for their 1 yr anniv or something). I really wished someone had approached me and said something, b/c I really was clueless.
Message edited 4/28/2008 1:04:39 PM.
|
Posted 4/28/08 1:04 PM  |
| |
|
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Ugh, the post posted before I was done with the poll. 
Anyway do you say something?
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:16 PM |
| |
|
nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:18 PM |
| |
|
BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
No! It's probably more tacky to tell someone they are being tacky!
I mean, it depends on the situation and who you are dealing with.
I think that in the situation you experienced, there was no way for them to tactfully tell you that you were being "tacky" (according to their etiquette). It would have been after the fact and there is nothing you could have done to correct it at that point so all they would have accomplished is making you feel bad.
But, if your best friend is getting married and she is planning on putting "cash only" on the invites you can step up and tell her it's tacky.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:21 PM |
| |
|
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by nrthshgrl
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
Her mother collected and opened her gifts
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:21 PM |
| |
|
MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by MsMBV
Posted by nrthshgrl
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
Her mother collected and opened her gifts
see now i would think THAT would be tacky--the mom checking out all the gifts.....or the fact that the family thought it was appropriate to TALK about how much people gave as gifts.....THAT is tacky to me.
some people just don't understand that when they are pointing 1 finger at someone else and calling them tacky to their face....3 more fingers are pointing right back at them.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:24 PM |
| |
|
nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by MsMBV
Posted by nrthshgrl
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
Her mother collected and opened her gifts
Ah so the mom is tacky.
How did you hear?
The bride should just tell her mom it's a NY thing & she should shut her mouth.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:29 PM |
| |
|
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by MsMBV
Posted by nrthshgrl
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
Her mother collected and opened her gifts
Ah so the mom is tacky.
How did you hear?
The bride should just tell her mom it's a NY thing & she should shut her mouth.
Oh they were not shy about it. Some of them were very upset that her "yankee" friend was invited. Let's just say they did not roll out the red carpet when we walked in.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:31 PM |
| |
|
nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by MsMBV
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by MsMBV
Posted by nrthshgrl
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
Her mother collected and opened her gifts
Ah so the mom is tacky.
How did you hear?
The bride should just tell her mom it's a NY thing & she should shut her mouth.
Oh they were not shy about it. Some of them were very upset that her "yankee" friend was invited. Let's just say they did not roll out the red carpet when we walked in.
Way to make a guest feel welcome. So tacky & no manners?
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:35 PM |
| |
|
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by nrthshgrl
Way to make a guest feel welcome. So tacky & no manners?
Yeah the RD was fun too. I had to listen to how much of a <insert expletive for Italian decent here> I was b/c I ordered red wine with dinner. Yeah it was fun.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:38 PM |
| |
|
headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by BabyAvocado
No! It's probably more tacky to tell someone they are being tacky!
this is what i was going to say
if they asked my opinion before they did it, i would say yes if i thought it was, and the reasons why
however, if they asked after the fact i don't know if i would say anything - i wouldn't want to make them feel bad
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:43 PM |
| |
|
CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by nrthshgrl
I wouldn't say anything ....but I will say that the bride & groom are tacky for discussing the amount of your gift with all of her relatives.
Totally! Why would they even discuss it and if you want to come to any gathering I throw in the future, I will happily accept your gift without discussing it further!
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:45 PM |
| |
|
MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by MsMBV
Posted by nrthshgrl
Way to make a guest feel welcome. So tacky & no manners?
Yeah the RD was fun too. I had to listen to how much of a <insert expletive for Italian decent here> I was b/c I ordered red wine with dinner. Yeah it was fun.
duh don't you know that sweet tea goes with EVERYTHING!!!!!
you tacky uppity biotch you.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:48 PM |
| |
|
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
I do love sweet tea. And I give myself credit for not cringing when they said Man-a-cahti.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:49 PM |
| |
|
MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by MsMBV
I do love sweet tea. And I give myself credit for not cringing when they said Man-a-cahti.
trust me -- i feel your pain. i lived in north/south carolina bouncing around for 5 years---and was a waitress in myrtle beach, sc for 2 years in a steakhouse. nothing was more cringe worth when Jimbo and Sue-Ellen brought their 5 kids and 6 cousins to the restaurant, and wanted a "fii-let mig-NON extra well done...make sure you bring dat dere ketchup when you bring my meat!"
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:53 PM |
| |
|
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Spinoff from Stephanie's post
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by MsMBV
I do love sweet tea. And I give myself credit for not cringing when they said Man-a-cahti.
trust me -- i feel your pain. i lived in north/south carolina bouncing around for 5 years---and was a waitress in myrtle beach, sc for 2 years in a steakhouse. nothing was more cringe worth when Jimbo and Sue-Ellen brought their 5 kids and 6 cousins to the restaurant, and wanted a "fii-let mig-NON extra well done...make sure you bring dat dere ketchup when you bring my meat!"
OMG that actually hurt me.
|
| Posted 4/28/08 1:55 PM |
| |
|
