I'm not yet pregnant, and DH & I are not planning on trying for a little while, but every so often the details of what goes along with having a baby come to mind. Two of those things are the baby shower, and the godparents/guardians...want to get your input.

The Shower
I'm torn. Part of me wants one, and part of me doesn't. I want one because it is a writ of passage, can be a fun way to celebrate with family and friends, and I don't want to regret not having one. On the other hand, I don't want a shower for of a number of reasons:
- the "jinx" factor...so maybe a party afterward, celebrating the baby's arrival
- who throws it? My mom is not terribly outgoing, and not really the type of person to put a party together. My MIL is very much a take charge person. I don't want my MIL to throw it on her own, and I know she won't be patient or compassionate enough to get my mom involved in a way she feels comfortable (DH agreed). I don't have any siblings, but have have very close friends that have told me they would throw me a baby shower when the time comes - but, I don't know that I want to put them through all the hassles they had to go through in dealing with my MIL for my bridal shower. Also, the idea of getting all of those women in a room together again...I don't know if I can take it...who's idea was that anyway!? I think I would opt for a casual coed BBQ type shower...nothing crazy or too traditional...just very simple, low key, laid back, and as stress free for everyone as possible. Any suggestions on how to handle the moms? I know my MIL will just take over if I'm not ready for her. Honestly, I would love to just have a small get together with my close friends...sort of a bachelorette party before having a baby...you know? ...but I know that won't go over well with the family. Part of me wonders if it will just be easier to tell people we don't want one for supersititious reasons, and we will have a party after the baby is born.

The Godparents & Guardians
How do you pick the godparents? I feel like it should be someone both you and hubby feel very close to, have faith in, and want to give a special relationship with your child to. We have agreed the guardians would be different from the godparents...but not sure who that would be either. One of my friends had a great perspective - our siblings will already be aunts/uncles to our children, so they have a special role...the godparents are a good way to bring other special people in our lives that much closer to our children. Again, I don't have siblings, but DH does...although neither of us are sure we would choose them - all things being equal at the time we have a child. Then there is the family stress factor, and who is "expected" to be chosen godparents...and you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. So frustrating! Family can be as horrible as it is wonderful sometimes. To me the guardians are a much more serious thing, they have to be people you trust to raise your children if you are not able to, in a way that you agree with, and in a location that feels right to you (close to family).

Looking for early guidance!