Please help me feel better...i feel so jipped!!

I was so excited when DD came and DH and I got to take her home. I was really getting into the swing of things with balancing the house work with DD and BF'ing.
Then the sickness hit, that long story is in my birth story on the Birth Story area.
Now, my OB wants me to stop BF'ing because i was so sick with the staph and i just can't let it go. He is the reason why i got the staph and the diagnosis was missed. It all could have been avoided if he had just listened to me when i told him something was wrong. Now he is telling me to give up the one thing that I was adament on doing, I have been doing the Fenugreek, my DH is getting More Milk Plus and Mother's Milk Tea for me tonight and the LC wants to see me next Thursday to try and get DD to latch and get my supply back. Screw my OB, im gonna trying my damndest to get my supply back.
I just can't help but feel jipped. Out of the first 2 weeks of my DD's life, i only got to be with her for a week. I am psyched to be back with her and enjoying every minute of it buit i can't help but feel upset that I was taken away from her and stuck in that hospital and the BF'ing thing has me upset too. Going from pumping 5 ounces at a time to barely half an ounce is a big change and i kinda feel like a failure that I can't give DD that breast milk. I know i shouldn't feel like that but i do.
Im trying so hard to get it back, i just want to feel happy again and not cheated. It was supposed to be an amazing experince for DH and I with out first and only child and it turned out so badly.
Why can't i get over this??

Re: Please help me feel better...i feel so jipped!!

In many ways I felt the same as you did right after I had Alexa. I had a HORRIBLE pregnancy.. I tried to have a home birth which I wanted more than ANYTHIGN int eh world, after 42 hours of HARD HARD labor I ended up transferring to the hospital because I didn't dilate. I was in labor for a total of 3 days. My daughter was born with a few medical conditions so the first few weeks of life we spent trucking from Dr. to Dr. and Specialist to Specialist.

On top or ALLL of this My daughter wouldn't latch.... I was so PI**ED about everything going wrong that I REFUSED to give up....

I exclusively pumped the first 8 weeks. At 7 W 5 D Alexa FINALLY latched... we suffered through supply issues and a HORRIBLE bout of Thrush but I didn't give up... I'm happy to say that at 6 months we are still BFing STRONG with no supply or latch issues.....

YOU CAN DO IT MAMA!!!!

It took me months to heal emotionally after my experience... I felt jipped and robbed in so many ways. Now, I can look at my experience and see all the POSITIVE and wonderful lessons I learned and I know that I'm a STRONGER WOMAN and MOTHER because of all of it....

Please feel free to FM me with any questiosn or just to vent... I'll be your cheerleader if you want...

YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Re: Please help me feel better...i feel so jipped!!

Thanks ladies! Im trying to be happy, i should be since I have a beautiful little angel but I can't help but feel upset.
Im really trying.

This isn't post partum depression is it??

Re: Please help me feel better...i feel so jipped!!

First of all .

You went through a very tramautic experience and I really feel for you. Maybe you can talk to someone about that. You didn't get to be with your baby when she was first home, so of course that will make you upset. Doesn't sound like PPD.

As far as the OB, I would switch asap. Get a second and maybe even a third onpinion. See the LC. In the meantime, supplement if that is what is best for your baby.

I know that you are "too close to the forest to see the trees" right now. But try and let go of the feeling of being cheated. In my opinion, even though you were, try to put it all behind you and start fresh. You don't want to look back on the first few weeks of DD's life and feel angry and cheated.