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Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)

Member since 7/08

19084 total posts

Name:
Jib

Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

So... I was just informed that on Saturday night I'll be sitting with a psychologist getting a clinical interview and a few assessments to check for anxiety and depression.


It's all part of the surrogacy process.... I get it ....


but it's just super ironic that *I* have to get psychologically assessed, when 16yr olds all the time are getting knocked up left and right .. who are NOT psychologically prepared for this.

Anyway.. who going through multiple losses and years of infertility is NOT anxious and depressed, at least to some degree? Chat Icon I feel like the real test should be that if you come out appearing TOTALLY normal, that there's definitely something wrong with you! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/12 12:16 PM
 
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wantabuninoven
My angel has a baby brother!

Member since 7/10

1050 total posts

Name:

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

I guess its all part of procedure but, it is kind of ridiculous.

Posted 5/2/12 12:45 PM
 

PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)

Member since 7/08

19084 total posts

Name:
Jib

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

totally ridiculous - but I'm just trying to keep it in perspective that everything is going so well right now Chat Icon Chat Icon and this is just how the game is played

Posted 5/2/12 12:55 PM
 

AngnShaun
Sisters

Member since 1/10

21015 total posts

Name:
Ang

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

lol epitomy of irony...

Posted 5/2/12 12:57 PM
 

bringonthebaby
Twins!

Member since 11/10

2334 total posts

Name:

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

SO true. People should have psychological testing done to be allowed to procreate, but they don't require that. Even if they aren't 16, some are too big of idiots to raise children.

I haven't been through nearly what you have and I can tell you I'm a lot more anxious having gone through what I have. Like you said, how can you NOT be??

I'm sure they understand though that you have been through a lot and if you do seem a little depressed or anxious, its totally warranted.

Posted 5/2/12 1:55 PM
 

ODonnell
.

Member since 9/05

5983 total posts

Name:

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

I know when we looked into egg donation this was one of the requirements. I do agree that it's so unfair but I *think* the reasoning behind it is to make sure you fully understand the ramifications of using a surrogate or donor as those situations involve more stress and emotional distress. At least that was my understanding.

Good luck. I keep checking to see if you have any news. Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/12 2:01 PM
 

CindySN23
Stop, Think & Breathe...

Member since 8/11

3550 total posts

Name:
Cindy

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

All I can say is wow Chat Icon !!! There really should be a test because there are a lot of people having kids who shouldn't...I really hope that this is a good sign and you will get matched quick!!!

Posted 5/2/12 2:26 PM
 

Jax430
Hi!

Member since 5/05

18919 total posts

Name:
Jackie

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

It is ironic, but I think the difference is that while no one gets psychologically evaluated to see if she is ready to be a mother, surrogacy involves a whole additional level of psychological and emotional preparation. Since an agency is involved, they probably have to make sure that they have covered all their bases in case the prospective parent proves to have emotional issues (beyond what is expected when dealing with IF) later on. It's going to be an emotionally draining process, and they have to ensure that you have the emotional capacity to handle it. Chat Icon

I totally get where it doesn't seem fair though.

Posted 5/2/12 2:55 PM
 

moonmist09
Thank you, St. Gerard!

Member since 2/11

5043 total posts

Name:
Antonella

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

Posted by PennyCat

totally ridiculous - but I'm just trying to keep it in perspective that everything is going so well right now Chat Icon Chat Icon and this is just how the game is played



i keep hoping to see a status updat from you hoping to hear good news.
This really is the way its played and your right, who doesn't have issued after dealing with losses and IF.
Try to keep positive and i will continue to send Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon your way!

Posted 5/2/12 4:46 PM
 

InShock
life is good

Member since 10/06

9258 total posts

Name:

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

Does this mean you have a match?! Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/12 5:59 PM
 

gina409
TWINS!

Member since 12/09

27635 total posts

Name:
g

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

Posted by Jax430

It is ironic, but I think the difference is that while no one gets psychologically evaluated to see if she is ready to be a mother, surrogacy involves a whole additional level of psychological and emotional preparation. Since an agency is involved, they probably have to make sure that they have covered all their bases in case the prospective parent proves to have emotional issues (beyond what is expected when dealing with IF) later on. It's going to be an emotionally draining process, and they have to ensure that you have the emotional capacity to handle it. Chat Icon

I totally get where it doesn't seem fair though.



itaChat Icon

Posted 5/2/12 9:56 PM
 

PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)

Member since 7/08

19084 total posts

Name:
Jib

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

Posted by ODonnell

I know when we looked into egg donation this was one of the requirements. I do agree that it's so unfair but I *think* the reasoning behind it is to make sure you fully understand the ramifications of using a surrogate or donor as those situations involve more stress and emotional distress. At least that was my understanding.

Good luck. I keep checking to see if you have any news. Chat Icon



I actually spoke to someone earlier who had to do this to get donor sperm... So yea... it's just part of the process... I just keep telling myself as annoying as this part is --- in IVF, it's not fair we have to do injections ... It's not fair once pregnant, we have to worry about losses... etc etc ...... So, this is just another step. It's not even that this is such a big deal, it's just the principle of it more than anything else that annoyed me ... Like, REALLY?! After all this, they wanna make sure we're fit to be parents? Chat Icon

I said to someone yesterday that people should not be born with vaginas, they should have to take tests after a certain age and get them handed to them once they are deemed responsible enough to have one!! Chat Icon

ETA: and thank you so much ladies Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I'll have an update soonish Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Message edited 5/2/2012 10:19:58 PM.

Posted 5/2/12 10:18 PM
 

beachgirl
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

7963 total posts

Name:
sara

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

You are traveling a long hard road but I promise you it will be worth it. Thinking of youChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/4/12 8:42 AM
 

bookworm
Two Little Rosebuds

Member since 8/09

2106 total posts

Name:

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

ITA

Like how LIIVF makes all IVF patients get evaluated by one of their social workers. Yet the heroin addicts I saw neglecting their baby on the Bronx train right after my last IVF failure...no evaluation necessary. Life's not fair.

Posted 5/4/12 6:05 PM
 

PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)

Member since 7/08

19084 total posts

Name:
Jib

Re: Oh irony.. gotta love it ...

Posted by bookworm

ITA

Like how LIIVF makes all IVF patients get evaluated by one of their social workers. Yet the heroin addicts I saw neglecting their baby on the Bronx train right after my last IVF failure...no evaluation necessary. Life's not fair.



OMG Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/4/12 6:19 PM
 
 

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