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Bugaboo
Relax!
Member since 5/05 2133 total posts
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Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
We had my Dh's family over to our new house this weekend and that was the first and last time they will ever be allowed. Every time they visit, they are such a nightmare to deal with and it's never pleasant for us. I hate having people wear shoes in the house, especially now that we have a baby that is crawling all over and I don't appreciate people not taking off their shoes when they know they should. They totally disregard our request when we ask them all the time. That is just very disrespectful. The last straw was with his mother. She's an emotional basket case and very sensitive, but she can talk about everyone else.  Anyways, the mother was saying how weird this family was and the daughter said, look who's calling someone weird. The mother's dog died a few months ago and she keeps the ashes on her nightstand. Well, the daughter said she brought the ashes on vacation with her and that it's probably in the guest room in our house! And the mother goes, you have a big mouth! When my DH heard that we looked at each other and was like ***!!! Who does that??!!! Who brings a dog's ashes to someones home, let alone a new home for a housewarming. That is just soooo messed up! I'm very superstitious about that, kind of old school that by doing that it is very bad luck to have in a home. I was so livid!! I told my DH that they are never allowed back ever again. I just hate spending time with them. It is just so stressful. They're really not normal, the mother especially. I need every excuse in the book not to have to spend any family gatherings with those nut cases ever again. The SIL isn't so bad but the ILs are a nightmare. It just really pi$$es me off. This is just one incident but they are unbearable. Don't get me started with the FIL when we're in public. Always embarassed.  Just needed to vent. 
Message edited 8/29/2005 11:15:46 AM.
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Posted 8/29/05 11:00 AM  |
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juju
Welcome to the World!
Member since 5/05 6747 total posts
Name:
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
OMG, YOu win!! You do have a crazy MIL! I would be so livid! Too Strange! I don't blame you one bit. It is beyond strange! Am I getting this story right?......you have dog ashes in your house? I don't know what else to tell you but 
ETA: Family should at least respect your wishes about not wearing shoes in the house. I wouldn't be offended. I know 3 families who don't wear shoes in the house.
Message edited 8/29/2005 10:26:45 PM.
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| Posted 8/29/05 10:00 PM |
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june262004
But I love the Snow!
Member since 5/05 15379 total posts
Name:
Kristin
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
HMMM... Sorry but I get kinda offended when people ASK me to take off my shoes  The dog thing is a little strange... BUT if could be worse. You could have mine 
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| Posted 8/29/05 10:07 PM |
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-Lisa-
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Member since 5/05 6530 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Posted by june262004
HMMM... Sorry but I get kinda offended when people ASK me to take off my shoes
me too - I think its rude to make your guest uncomfortable.
Your MIL sounds like a nut, but I don't see how you can never have her over again. What does your DH say about it?
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| Posted 8/29/05 10:13 PM |
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
yeah, I think it's alittle strange when people ask you to take your shoes off (I would do it if asked, I just don't really think it's necessary)
Your MIL DOES sound strange, but it is DH's mom....how does he feel about never having her over again?
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| Posted 8/29/05 10:18 PM |
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NASP09
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Member since 6/05 6030 total posts
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
I think if you have a baby crawling on the floor and putting everything in their mouth, its perfectly ok to ask people to take their shoes off. You dont know what they stepped on and you certainly dont want those germies getting to your baby
As for the dog thing EEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW
that is seriously wierd
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| Posted 8/29/05 10:35 PM |
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june262004
But I love the Snow!
Member since 5/05 15379 total posts
Name:
Kristin
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Posted by kbeana24
I think if you have a baby crawling on the floor and putting everything in their mouth, its perfectly ok to ask people to take their shoes off. You dont know what they stepped on and you certainly dont want those germies getting to your baby
As for the dog thing EEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW
that is seriously wierd
.
Do you know how much dirt babies eat before they turn a year!
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| Posted 8/29/05 10:39 PM |
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steph4777
**************
Member since 5/05 11726 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Your MIL sounds like a real piece of work.
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| Posted 8/29/05 11:53 PM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Posted by -Lisa-
Posted by june262004
HMMM... Sorry but I get kinda offended when people ASK me to take off my shoes
me too - I think its rude to make your guest uncomfortable.
I agree also!! Isnt that what vacuumns and brooms are for?? to clean up your floors??
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| Posted 8/30/05 9:10 AM |
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AnnBrunoXO
2 Girls For Me!
Member since 5/05 4377 total posts
Name:
MaMMa
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Your Mother-in-law does sound strange - sorry you have to go through that - but none-the-less they are still your husbands family - how does he feel about never having them over again?
In regard to the issue about everyone taking off their shoes when they come to your house -i personally don't think I should and would never want anyone coming over to my house to take off their shoes - not unless we are in the middle of a snowstorm and that would only be to prevent water getting all over the house. I'm pregnant and have several family members and friends that have babies - even newborns - never have they told me to take off my shoes - i think thats insane!
I try to avoid stepping on rugs or babies play area - but ultimately thats what brooms and mops are for - to clean up. Everyday the furniture gets dirty - we just have to keep it clean - the bathroom gets dirty, we clean it - would the next step be to have everyone that comes over wash their hands? I would just hope people know better before handling any child to not have dirty hands. JMO.
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| Posted 8/30/05 9:32 AM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
AUGH! Whata nightmare. The ashes thing is just WEEEIRD. About the shoes. i know a LOT of people who don't like you to wear shoes in teh house. FH has all white carpeting, so we take our shoes off. Most people just follow our lead. I know a lot of people who don't want you to wear shoes in the house. The only time it bothered me is with my in laws. They won't let you wear shoes in teh house, but the floors are FILTHY....ick....
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| Posted 8/30/05 9:41 AM |
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casey31
Mommy of 3!
Member since 5/05 2967 total posts
Name:
Mommy to two boys and a girl
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
She brought her dog's ashes to your house! 
I'm sorry- that's just nuts!! 
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| Posted 8/30/05 10:11 AM |
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dooodles
When you wish upon a star
Member since 5/05 11997 total posts
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Because 2 people fell in love
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
While I don't understand why she brought the dogs ashes with her, did it really hurt you in anyway? I agree it is weird, but that's probably why she tried keeping it quiet. I guess that makes her feel comfortable having her old friend with her. I wouldn't not invite her over because of it. I would say it makes you uncomfortable and ask her not to do it again.
Babies need to have contact with dirt and germs so they can build up a resistance as they get older. So if they come in contact with some on the rug you can clean the baby and vaccum the floor. Don't push DH's family away over the small issues. As I always say, you gotta pick your battles
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| Posted 8/30/05 12:48 PM |
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Bugaboo
Relax!
Member since 5/05 2133 total posts
Name:
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Not having them over isn't just over these two things. It's been mounting for some time now with every get together, occassion, and holiday. They are very difficult and there is constant yelling and fighting even days before they get here. Every time we tell them not to do something they totally disregard what we say and just do it anyways, especially the mother. She's very spiteful. I didn't think the whole shoe thing was such a big deal. It's not like we're yelling at them to do it, but they know. I just find it disrespectful that they completely disregard our request when it's our house. The whole dog ashes thing is just lunacy. It's a housewarming and you just don't bring your dead dog's ashes. It's just bad karma to bring something that is death related to someone's new home. I understand that babies need to be exposed to things to build their immune systems and what not, but I just prefer germs and bacteria from like public restrooms not be trekked into the house for the baby to come in contact with. It's my DH and I who would have to take care of a sick baby, no one else. The MIL is also one who doesn't wash her hands with soap after handling raw eggs while she's cooking and then wants to hold the baby. Besides, they're always worried about the traffic coming to LI and they always make it sound like it's such a hardship for them to come out here when they're less than an hour away. God forbid you hit some traffic if any during the summer to come see your only grandchild. They're just miserable people and I don't need misery as company.
Message edited 8/30/2005 1:23:49 PM.
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| Posted 8/30/05 1:21 PM |
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ddunne2
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 4189 total posts
Name:
Doreen
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
I think whatever the rules of your house are should be respected by those that visit, including family, friends. I'm pretty sure it is an unspoken rule to not bring a dead dog's ashes to a family members house! What a wacko!
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| Posted 8/30/05 2:04 PM |
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Bebalina
<3
Member since 6/05 2922 total posts
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Posted by ddunne2
I think whatever the rules of your house are should be respected by those that visit, including family, friends. I'm pretty sure it is an unspoken rule to not bring a dead dog's ashes to a family members house! What a wacko!
ditto
and I agree about the shoes being taken off, i'm the same, i prefer ppl to take off their shoes, I mean are you not supposed to let your child crawl around then each time someone comes over....
i think ppl should respect that, whether its carpeting or a hardwood floor.
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| Posted 8/30/05 4:15 PM |
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MommyofG
just the girls
Member since 5/05 9461 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Posted by Lisa
Posted by -Lisa-
Posted by june262004
HMMM... Sorry but I get kinda offended when people ASK me to take off my shoes
me too - I think its rude to make your guest uncomfortable.
I agree also!! Isnt that what vacuumns and brooms are for?? to clean up your floors??
I would be annoyed if someone asked me to take my shoes off too!!!! It is rude. Anyone see that episode of sex in the city when someone stole carries molono's (sp) anyway on the dirt issue- no matter how clean you keep your house there is dirt and germs everywhere- Your baby can get sicker from someone picking them up who didnt wash their hands after going to the bathroom!!!! then what someone steps on!!!
the ashes- well that is a bit extreme but its not the worst! some people are very very attached to their pets, some even have them stuffed!!! you shouldnt judge her just b/c she cant let go of her beloved pet.
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| Posted 8/30/05 4:34 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Your MIL does sound 'wierd"...Dead dogs ashes to the house?
I do have to agree with those who said asking your guests to take thier shoes off is rude.
I just got a house myself, and will be having a housewarming party. Im not bound to ask every single one of my guests to take thier shoes off.
If its snowing, yeah, I may.
However, if they want to do it on their own, thats fine too.
I just think its disrespectful to ask your guests to be "uncomfortable".
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| Posted 8/30/05 9:36 PM |
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Bugaboo
Relax!
Member since 5/05 2133 total posts
Name:
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Wow! I can't believe the whole taking shoes off thing is such a big deal.
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| Posted 8/31/05 8:20 AM |
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MommyofG
just the girls
Member since 5/05 9461 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Not Allowing DH's Family Over EVER AGAIN!!
Posted by Bugaboo
Wow! I can't believe the whole taking shoes off thing is such a big deal.
YUP, 2 more threads were posted on NFR about it too!!!
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| Posted 8/31/05 12:12 PM |
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