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windest
LIF Adult
Member since 8/10 1064 total posts
Name:
Windy
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No shower for you!
So this is my second baby and I wasn't really expecting a shower but... I'm surprised no one in my family or DH's family has planned anything considering this LO is a girl. I wasn't thinking about it until my MIL gave me a bunch of baby girl clothes (all very cute and I was really happy with the gift), but as I was looking through them she said, "I got you this stuff since there will be no shower for you this time around." She said it very serious - and even repeated herself. It's fine but a little part of me feels sad about it. My sister had showers for 3 of her 4 kids (two of which I threw for her). Am I being silly or would this make you feel just a little bit sad? 
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Posted 5/14/13 9:34 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Linzee636
LIF Toddler
Member since 2/11 454 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: No shower for you!
I think it was a really nice gesture but I would probably feel a bit sad too at the reminder that I wouldn't have a shower for the second time around. my best friend is having her second and she's in her third tri and I haven't heard a peep about a shower. I will buy her some stuff too, because i want to shower her 2nd DC with gifts, but I can't say that I'd go out of my way to point out that it's because there's "no shower for you."
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| Posted 5/14/13 9:45 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: No shower for you!
I wouldn't be upset at all....honestly I am not keen on second/third etc showers...
it's NOT that i don't think a baby shouldn't be celebrated BUT i do think that people will bring clothes/gifts etc and the baby always gets celebrated. I just don't think a shower needs to be thrown for every baby. In my family, you get ONE shower. For your first. It's a chance to receive all the big items to help a couple out when starting their family. I never ever expected nor even wanted a shower after my first. Don't take it to heart!
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| Posted 5/14/13 9:54 PM |
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Eagermom3
LIF Toddler
Member since 4/13 448 total posts
Name:
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Re: No shower for you!
aww id be sad too! I think for later babies a sprinkle is grt with close fam and close friends.
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| Posted 5/14/13 10:00 PM |
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LL514
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1901 total posts
Name:
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No shower for you!
I would never expect a shower for my second child so I would not be disapointed. But I know that my family membera would still buy me gifts for the baby, most likely clothes especially if it's a different gender or season.
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| Posted 5/14/13 11:04 PM |
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Maybe-Baybe
My Sunshine
Member since 7/12 3415 total posts
Name:
My only Sunshine
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Re: No shower for you!
Yeah I would be a little bummed too especially because your sister had a few, but what can you do right? I'm sure you'll still get lots of gifts and love for your LO.
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| Posted 5/15/13 1:09 AM |
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JenandMikey
life is good =)
Member since 5/07 4216 total posts
Name:
We're so blessed!
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Re: No shower for you!
Posted by maybebaby
I wouldn't be upset at all....honestly I am not keen on second/third etc showers...
it's NOT that i don't think a baby shouldn't be celebrated BUT i do think that people will bring clothes/gifts etc and the baby always gets celebrated. I just don't think a shower needs to be thrown for every baby. In my family, you get ONE shower. For your first. It's a chance to receive all the big items to help a couple out when starting their family. I never ever expected nor even wanted a shower after my first. Don't take it to heart!
Ditto to everything! Don't worry people that matte the most in your life most likely will buy whatever u need beforehand or upon the baby's arrival he/she will get a "welcome to the world" type gift so the baby will be celebrated just not in a party form 
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| Posted 5/15/13 7:21 AM |
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cantbelieveit
Love these kids!
Member since 10/05 4708 total posts
Name:
Tammy
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Re: No shower for you!
Awww, that stinks! I had a second shower because I waited 7 years to have another dc. I wouldn't expect one for a 3rd. But I can understand your disappointment.
Is there anyway she is saying that to you to throw you off and suprise you? Just a thought.
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| Posted 5/15/13 7:27 AM |
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luvmyReese
Hello Kitty
Member since 1/08 7542 total posts
Name:
Catt
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No shower for you!
I would host my own baby party after she is born, to celebrate her & share her with your closest friends and family. I think every child/pregnancy should be recognized regardless of ppl think its right or wrong to give a small cute gift.. they dont have to attend. I wouldn't expect either but I wouldn't NOT celebrate either.
My children are at least 5yrs apart and I had a big shower for my first DS, another for my DD 6 yrs later and a Sprinkle for my current pregnancy thrown by my newer friends and it was beautiful and not a crazy over done party..it was quiet and cute and fun. Dont worry and enjoy your pregnancy and the gifts that you get regardless.
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| Posted 5/15/13 8:26 AM |
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AMLMT1
LIF Adult
Member since 10/09 933 total posts
Name:
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Re: No shower for you!
I never felt sad nor would i want a 2nd shower. I feel i got all the basics (swing, bouncer, pack n play, crib, etc) at my 1st shower so I wouldn't want a 2nd. All your family and friends will give you tons of baby girl things when the baby is born so I wouldn't be upset.
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| Posted 5/15/13 8:33 AM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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No shower for you!
IMO if you really want one then throw it yourself.
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| Posted 5/15/13 8:45 AM |
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Kitten1929
LIF Adult
Member since 1/13 6040 total posts
Name:
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Re: No shower for you!
I am a little confused because you say you didn't expect one, but you're sad no one planned anything, so that makes me think you did expect one.
I've noticed that showers beyond the first baby are totally vary - some people will do one for every baby, and others won't do anything. I think it really has to do with the expense involved in a shower and the "gift" part, in that, some people think another shower with more gifts is gratiuitous whether it's a different sex or not.
If you are sad about it, then throw a small sprinkle for yourself.
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| Posted 5/15/13 9:07 AM |
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asecretmommytobe09
My little pumpkin is here!!!!
Member since 10/08 3369 total posts
Name:
Katie
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Re: No shower for you!
Aww im sorry i dont blame you for being alittle sad. I think that if its a girl they should have thrown you a sprinkle.
I honestly think every baby should be celebrated. Especially if you thew some showers for your sister.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a little something if its your second or third baby.
I dont thing someone should registered again, but i think that a celebration of this LO is appropriate.
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| Posted 5/15/13 9:44 AM |
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GlowSuarez
Baby Marz is here!
Member since 12/10 1494 total posts
Name:
G
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Re: No shower for you!
My sil is expecting her second boy, I know this is a second scenario but she told me even if she was having a girl she would definitely host her own shower in this case sprinkle. If I am to have a girl next I would throw myself a little sprinkle just because I would feel bad for my family doing another one since they are all involved in this shower. I also kind of want to plan it they have excluded me from everything lol
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| Posted 5/15/13 9:48 AM |
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lucky1007
My Princess is Here!
Member since 11/11 1131 total posts
Name:
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Re: No shower for you!
I would be a sad for sure! At the least I would think a sprinkle especially if it's a girl this time around.
I really don't understand the whole "no shower after the first" thing. I understand not going crazy and having everyone you know come together for like a bridal shower, but you would think that close friends and family would want to come together to celebrate any birth in the family regardless if it's a boy a girl, the second or the third. A BBQ, a simple get together...call it a sprinkle, call it a shower either way it's a gathering of people who would want to celebrate you and baby. Why isn't this baby deserving of a celebration?
That's my opinion anyway.
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| Posted 5/15/13 10:03 AM |
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Aly764
Isla Grace born on 11/15/13 <3
Member since 6/12 1021 total posts
Name:
Alyssa
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No shower for you!
I kind of agree with the one shower thing... I mean that's how my family's always done it. It is a little sad that you get all this stuff for baby 1 and when baby 2 comes, he/she just gets the hand-me-downs. But there comes a point when it's like- how much stuff do you really need? Maybe someone will still throw you a sprinkle. Did you register for anything? If you threw one for your sister maybe you should express to her that you were really hoping she would return the favor. I am sure your little girl will get plenty of things- after buying little boy stuff people are always excited for the little girl stuff! I would suggest registering for a few things and letting people know that you didn't do it because you EXPECT gifts, but you figured just in case people wanted to buy something for the baby they will know what you need.
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| Posted 5/15/13 10:27 AM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name:
Keri
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Re: No shower for you!
Posted by maybebaby
I wouldn't be upset at all....honestly I am not keen on second/third etc showers...
it's NOT that i don't think a baby shouldn't be celebrated BUT i do think that people will bring clothes/gifts etc and the baby always gets celebrated. I just don't think a shower needs to be thrown for every baby. In my family, you get ONE shower. For your first. It's a chance to receive all the big items to help a couple out when starting their family. I never ever expected nor even wanted a shower after my first. Don't take it to heart!
Same here.
If someone threw me a sprinkle- I'd be over the moon thrilled and appreciative, but I don't expect or need it
It is kind of sad that that part of my life is done- but I know this baby will be celebrated when he/she is born
ETA: when I was pg with #2 my BIL kept telling me to have a diaper party. I'd never heard of it- but you could look into doing something like that.
Message edited 5/15/2013 11:57:21 AM.
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| Posted 5/15/13 11:55 AM |
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No shower for you!
I am also in the one shower group, however I find that if there is a large gap between children then a sprinkle is ok.
That being said at my shower my dad said to me "this is the last shower we will ever through you so I hope you enjoyed it". He wasn't being mean about it...he was being honest and he said it in a playful way. Anyway, while I know I won't have another shower and while I don't really think I should have one, I still got sad thinking that I'm not having another shower ever again. It was my last one and was a little heartbreaking (not the shower, the fact that it was my last).
I think for our next child I'll do what they call a viewing party instead of a shower. After he/she is born I'll invite people over to visit and meet with the baby a few weeks after he/she is born. It will be a celebration of the baby and will be a chance to invite people like an open house. We'll have a Christening but not everyone would be invited to that.
At least this is how I feel now, who knows when the time will actually come how I will feel.
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| Posted 5/15/13 12:55 PM |
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katiebug
I'll love you for always
Member since 2/08 4624 total posts
Name:
Katie
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Re: No shower for you!
What about hosting a Sip and See after the baby is born. I am not big on self thrown sprinkles/showers for second babies, although i would still attend, but I like the idea of welcoming the baby parties for second, third etc, time moms.
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| Posted 5/15/13 1:49 PM |
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AScottWolf
I <3 our squish!
Member since 11/10 2237 total posts
Name:
Adriana
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Re: No shower for you!
I'm on the 1 shower bandwagon. If I were invited to a full on shower for a second baby for extended family and not close close friends i'd be a little put off. At that point, honestly, I would think they were looking for gifts.
Obv. In extreme circumstances, such as hurricane sandy related loses or something else I'm not thinking of, that's a diff story. If its immediate family and good friends I'd get them something regardless of if they had a shower or not.
For me, I honestly wouldn't want another shower after my first. It's fine to get gifts but I can't even imagine registering again for newer things when my old ones are just as good. Clothes don't count.
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| Posted 5/15/13 5:54 PM |
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StarsStripes
LIF Adult
Member since 12/12 1192 total posts
Name:
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No shower for you!
So why isn't your sister throwing you a shower?
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| Posted 5/15/13 6:52 PM |
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JME78
LIF Adult
Member since 11/09 3672 total posts
Name:
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Re: No shower for you!
I wouldn't be sad - but I don't like baby showers in general and am not having one and this is my first!
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| Posted 5/15/13 7:30 PM |
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