NICU MOMS

I see there are a lot of us here. I thought it would be a good idea to post your best advice to some of the new moms going through this. Any and every bit is appreciated.

Some of my tips:

touch and hold your baby as much as the hospital will allow you. do kangaroo care (skin to skin) if you can. this helps preemies grow and is a wonderful bonding experience.

if you cannot breast feed, pump your milk. i know its hard and tiring b/c you wnat to be in the hospital with your baby, but it helps them so much. most hospitals have pumping rooms and will supply you with the equipment.

talk to the other moms!!!! this helped me through so much. they are in the same boat as you so get to know them.

get to know the nurses. once Amelia was there for a few weeks, she had the same nurses so they really got to know her. get to know them.

Ladies, share your tips.

Re: NICU MOMS

I'm not sure I have any additional tips...but I was a NICU mom.

I used to bring a book and read to DD when she was in the NICU. I also brought a stuffed animal to leave with her in the incubator (or on top of it) when I wasn't there.

Re: NICU MOMS

Get to the know the nurses!! They become your lifeline of sorts....I got soo much info from them, usually more than the dr.'s were giving us. And they gave me some really valuable tips for when we went home.

Re: NICU MOMS

I agree with all the hints above...here are a few more of mine....
-Take care of yourself---get your sleep and eat well---sounds basic, but important.
-Don't be afraid to bring little outfits in for your baby----I found that the nurses liked to "play dress up" and it made me feel better
-Use the time as an opportunity to learn---we learned as much as we could from the nurses and doctors, as he got older they let us bathe him, dress him, feed him. Ask questions about anything you aren't sure about---as a first time mom I felt we were so much better prepared when we brought him home
-Try not to let the dings and beeps 'rule your world'---one thing I learned is when the monitor goes off, the most important thing is to look at your baby
-I also pumped for my DS until he was strong enough to try to BF---I have to say this was one of my biggest challenges, but is possible!! Our NICU also had a pumping room which helped.
-I often went alone during the day after DH went back to work---I would bring things to keep me busy--I worked on his baby book, wrote thankyou notes & read, talk to the nurses & other moms
-my personal experience, all of our family is out of town, we had multiple calls a day to see how the baby was---I got to a point where I was so frustrated I didn't want to talk to anyone, it was just too much to rehash everything again---so, know that its okay not to call people back right away if you can;t---they will get over it----instead I would have DH call or send out an email
I will try to think of more.....

Re: NICU MOMS

Re: NICU MOMS

DS was in the NICU for a few days, just to let his temp and blood sugar stabilize. We felt a little guilty seeing him in there. Most of the DC in there were half his weight and had 2x as many wires and tubes attached to them....

One thing we learned after the fact was to ask the nurses. Anything you are wondering about, thinking about, would like to have, etc. DW would BF in the NICU room, but we found out later that there was actually a quiet, private room off to the side that we could have used, if we just thought to ask about.

Re: NICU MOMS

I am a NICU Mom. I was just recalling this all this morning. I guess because I have been so involved in planning his 2nd birthday

Def be there as much as you can. It helped me so much. And get as involved as you can and def become close to the nurses. The Dr.'s try and help but the nurses have a different and kinder way most times. In my experience. Learn as much as you can about what is going on. And take pictures. I took so many of him in there and now when I look back, I remember the rough start we had and were we are now

Re: NICU MOMS

Thought of another one:

if your child is going to be in teh NICU for a while, go to the patient realtions office and ask for a parking permit. this saved us sooo much $$$. I know Winthrop offiers it, not sure about other hospitals.

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Re: NICU MOMS

Re: NICU MOMS

As we get closer to Jayden's 1st birthday next week, I've been thinking about the time he spent in NICU. Boy does that seem like a lifetime ago.

In addition to what everyone else said, here are mine:
- Ask if they offer meals for BF moms. The Children's hospital where DS was in offered me a meal once or twice a day.
- Elect one family member as your spokesperson and they can share updates with other family members
- Arrange for an hour or two alone - I would go for coffee or just a walk to clear my head. I even got my hair done and I felt so much better bc I felt so run down
- If you have other children, make sure you schedule special time with them also. You might feel like the baby needs your attention a little more, but your other child(ren) also need you. I can guarantee it will make you feel better.

Message edited 3/19/2008 12:16:40 PM.

Re: NICU MOMS

***Remember you are the mommy and you get every question answered!
***Bring a pad and write things down--my notes were better than the drs!
***Make friends---we have 2 couples that we are very close with from the hospital
*** Oh and these friends---ask them their first names....we went by so and sos mommy and daddy for so long
***As difficult as the time can be...enjoy the times that you can....these are the first few days/weeks/months of you child's life!

Re: NICU MOMS

In terms of bonding with your child, continue to do what you've been doing, reaching in and touching him. It is best to use a constant touch with a preemie instead of stroking or other repetitive touch (the touch would be more of a containment touch). Start to observe his cues to get a feel for what he likes. Another thing that you can do while you are away is to sleep with a baby blanket of your sons. Have his nurse place it next to him in the isolate SO he can smell your scent.
Ask your nurse what resources are available at the hospital. Another great support are other families. Be careful not to be too invasive when meeting other families, but be friendly in family or waiting rooms. You might just find another person with a preemie who is going through many of the same emotions and fears as you.

Message edited 3/19/2008 9:03:15 PM.

Re: NICU MOMS

The best advice I got was Every Preemie is different, do not google preemies as this will scare you more.

Ask to do Non nutrative sucking-remember to pump first (for older preemies 32+ weeks) Baby uses you like a pacifier and helps develop sucking reflex-the neonatologist pushed this and it helped.

Re: NICU MOMS

another thing---i tried to be there during rounds----when the doctor and the pa/np came around to see the baby---that way they could answer questions and give me an update---I didn't do this everyday, but atleast a couple times a week, otherwise it was harder to talk to the dr, I could always talk to the np or pa

Re: NICU MOMS

Re: NICU MOMS

A lot of the advice I would give has already been given above. Also, if you are run down, it is okay to take a break. That is much better than bringing a cold into the NICU. I was sick and I stayed in a waiting room one afternoon while DH visited with the baby. I spent that time reading newsletters from a local NICU support group, The Little Angel Fund and I think there were also some from the March of Dimes. I read so many stories about babies who went on to have wonderful lives after the NICU. I was meant to read those stories. It helped so much. Find out if such a group comes to your hospital.