Need Some Ideas - LONG

DH and I currently live in Ronkonkoma. I grew up in Levittown-ish area and that is where all my friends/family are. He has lived in our current area for about 15 yrs and all of his friends (which are his family) are. We work together in Lindenhurst.
My mom is selling her co-op. All of us have spoken of buying a Mtr/Dtr and splittling expenses, etc. We have all outlined very clear "rules and guidelines" as far as what type of house and the overall living arrangements. Could be temp, could be perm. Furthest east that mom is willing to buy is F'dale area, due to work and school for my bro.
DH and I have also spoken about getting our own home. We currently rent a 1BR apt and TTC. We outgrew our apt 2 yrs ago, but have been making due. Knowing that we are TTC, we are trying to get lving arrangements settled now - before we have to. We are happy renters. We both work 6 days a week and do not really want the maintenance issues assoc with owning a home. But we can also argue all the reasons why owning a house is better than renting. So we are torn.
I don't want to be so far away from friends/family. Neither does he. What areas are between Ronk and Levittown, prefer S Shore since we work in Lindenhurst, affordable homes, good SD. Or should we stick with the idea of buying the house with my mom, DH knowing and willing to make sacrifice, not knowing how long we would stay there, but knowing that if we are not happy after a few yrs, we can always leave? We are really torn about what to do. And everyone we talk to has a diff opinion, so we really don't get any help that way.

Re: Need Some Ideas - LONG

Have you thought about buying a condo or a co-op? You can get a 2 or 3 bedroom unit, depending on how long you plan to be there and how big of a family you will have.

I raise this because you say that you want to own a place rather than rent, but you don't have the time or desire to do a lot of the maintenance that comes with home ownership. A co-op or condo can give you the benefits of home ownership (tax deductions, etc.) AND they are pretty low maintenance. And they are very affordable options for first-time buyers, and it's sort of a good transition step between renting an apartment and owning a whole house.

If you really want a single-family home, then I think your decision about whether to go the mother-daughter route depends on a lot of factors, such as your relationship with your mom, your dh's relationship with your mom, whether you can deal with not knowing whether your living situation is temporary or permanent, etc. If it were me, and I could afford it, I would want to have my own home with dh. But it's a personal decision.

There are a lot of affordable towns on the south shore that are good commuting distance to Lindenhurst. Feel free to contact me if you need some help with your search (once you decide what you will be doing!).