Need Advice with this one..

DH is going to be in one of his friend's wedding party this October. The guys are planning on going away for the BP, maybe Vegas. Now my problem is that we have NO $$$$. I mean we are broke. We just bought our house that needs tons of work and the work that we are doing is costing us so much more than we expected. We have like 4 biggie projects that we need to do. We also owe tons of money for our taxes! Also, being we moved in around October, we need to do so much yard work. Our fences are falling apart and just clean up. I mentioned to DH that it's not that I don't want him to go, but we truly can't afford it and I suggested that they go out for a night instead. My dh really wants to go as he feels this might be the last time he can go away with his friends. Meanwhile, I heard Madonna was coming to our area this summer and he told me NO WAY, we're broke. I just don't think it's fair. When we got married, no one went out of their way for my husband to plan his BP. We felt that everyone's money can be tight and didn't want to burden anyone with the extra expense. So now if he does go away, we might have to wait to do one of these projects with our house. Sorry for venting....TIA

Message edited 2/21/2006 10:28:55 AM.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

I totally understand how you feel, my DH can be the same way- no money to do stuff with me, but he's got money for the boys. Here's what I tell my DH, if he's got money to go to Vegas with the boys, then he's got money to do what I want too. If not, then we can skip both. Make sure that if he's getting what he wants, then so are you- whether that's a new fence, Madonna tickets, a trip, etc... You shouldn't have to sacrifice in order for him to go away with his friends.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

sounds to me like he really should not go.
cant you just tell him he cant?
im surprised he cant see that you guys arent monatarily set for that.
its not cheap going to vegas and that money could be spent on a weekend for the two of you to getaway or on the house.

im sorry, i hope it works out though.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

When we got married, my DH had his bachelor party in Vegas...he had eight guys in his bridal party and four went to Vegas. It's not mandatory for everyone to go. As a matter of fact, the guy who came up with the idea couldn't go at the last minute cuz he lost his job. Some of the other's didn't go cuz their wives forbid it (don't even want to go there ).
So, if money is really that tight, your DH should just not go and maybe they can all go out to dinner before the wedding. I know if that situation came up with us right now, Dan wouldn't be going. I can't see getting into debt for a bachelor party.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

I wouldn't want him go to either.

But why does he think this will be the last time he can go away with his friends? It isn't like they are going to disappear. I'm sure there will be more opportunities for them to take a trip together- and hopefully money will be better by then?

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Re: Need Advice with this one..

dont give in!!!

if hes woried about not seeing the boys altogether again have him plan something here with them, it doesnt have to be anything expensive, if seeing the boys is all that matters he can do that anywhere.

Message edited 2/21/2006 10:40:13 AM.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Thank you for all responding. What you are all saying is what I feel. I know as soon as I tell him he "cannot go", he flips out like I'm trying to tell him what to do and then he wants to do it even more. So I'm trying to go about it more calmly and honestly. I take care of all of our bills. I need to sit him down and show him that we are in our overdraw paying for our monthly bills. Maybe that will get him. But I know him, he has some money on the side from his mom that she gave us to fix the house and he'll wind up using some of that and that makes me so mad .

Re: Need Advice with this one..

i would let it go for now but i do agree that it is way too much money to spend for a bachlor's party. if most of the other guys are married and have a family, chances are that they are going to be able to afford to go either. can't they do something closer to home like AC?

what is the deal w/ men and extravagent bachelor parties?

Re: Need Advice with this one..

My Dh would not be traveling anywhere if we didn't have the money.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Posted by skew

i would let it go for now but i do agree that it is way too much money to spend for a bachlor's party. if most of the other guys are married and have a family, chances are that they are going to be able to afford to go either. can't they do something closer to home like AC?

what is the deal w/ men and extravagent bachelor parties?

Message edited 2/21/2006 11:00:55 AM.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Posted by Baboots

Posted by skew

i would let it go for now but i do agree that it is way too much money to spend for a bachlor's party. if most of the other guys are married and have a family, chances are that they are going to be able to afford to go either. can't they do something closer to home like AC?

what is the deal w/ men and extravagent bachelor parties?

I'm trying.....Exactly, they act like it's the greatest thing in the world. Half of them will probably cheat on their wives or girlfriends anyway. Thankfully, my husband is not the cheating kind, but he is the drinking and partying kind and that also makes me worry too. I guess, I will have to let it go for now..Thanks Ugggh, I wish it was just all over with already

ETA: Maybe when they give him the price, he'll realize it's way too much money. He's thinking 1K.. Does anyone know how much it costs to go to Vegas for a long weekend? I haven't been there in so long.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Posted by skew

Posted by Baboots

Posted by skew

i would let it go for now but i do agree that it is way too much money to spend for a bachlor's party. if most of the other guys are married and have a family, chances are that they are going to be able to afford to go either. can't they do something closer to home like AC?

what is the deal w/ men and extravagent bachelor parties?

I'm trying.....Exactly, they act like it's the greatest thing in the world. Half of them will probably cheat on their wives or girlfriends anyway. Thankfully, my husband is not the cheating kind, but he is the drinking and partying kind and that also makes me worry too. I guess, I will have to let it go for now..Thanks Ugggh, I wish it was just all over with already

ETA: Maybe when they give him the price, he'll realize it's way too much money. He's thinking 1K.. Does anyone know how much it costs to go to Vegas for a long weekend? I haven't been there in so long.

he doesn't know how much it will cost? BELIEVE me, when he finds out that it will be WAY over 1k, his outlook will change.



I HOPE YOU'RE RIGHT.

Message edited 2/21/2006 11:05:15 AM.

Re: Need Advice with this one..

Posted by skew

Posted by Baboots

Posted by skew

i would let it go for now but i do agree that it is way too much money to spend for a bachlor's party. if most of the other guys are married and have a family, chances are that they are going to be able to afford to go either. can't they do something closer to home like AC?

what is the deal w/ men and extravagent bachelor parties?

I'm trying.....Exactly, they act like it's the greatest thing in the world. Half of them will probably cheat on their wives or girlfriends anyway. Thankfully, my husband is not the cheating kind, but he is the drinking and partying kind and that also makes me worry too. I guess, I will have to let it go for now..Thanks Ugggh, I wish it was just all over with already

ETA: Maybe when they give him the price, he'll realize it's way too much money. He's thinking 1K.. Does anyone know how much it costs to go to Vegas for a long weekend? I haven't been there in so long.

he doesn't know how much it will cost? BELIEVE me, when he finds out that it will be WAY over 1k, his outlook will change.