2 Girls and 1 Boy!
Member since 7/07
3504 total posts
My Planned Homebirth Story
Nora Rose is almost one and I finally got around to finishing her birth story!
Here is a little background to understand how I came to the decision in having a planned homebirth. I had my first two at St. Charles with a midwife. DS was born in 2010 and it was a traumatic birth. I had a 30+ hour labor and it resulted in a vacuum assisted vaginal delivery with an epidural. Fast forward 19 months later, I had DD1 and she came fast and furious and there was no time for an epidural (although I was screaming and begging for one). Her birth story can be found here: Erin's Birth Story I can vividly remember during transition with her thinking I was going to die and I was begging for DH, the nurse and the midwife to help me. As soon as she was born I told myself I was absolutely having a doula if I have another child to reassure me that I was not going to die and that everything that was occurring was “normal.” I also felt amazing after having DD1 with no drugs. There was such a difference between the two births. In between DD1 and DD2 I did a lot of reading and research and I feel in love with the idea of a homebirth and loved reading everyone’s home birth stories but I didn’t know if I would have the balls to actually do it.
DH and I were on the fence if we wanted another baby. DD1 was almost 3 and DS was 4 and life was starting to get easier as they got more independent. There always a question though in the back of our heads. We decided to try one month and if meant to be will be and if not, we close up shop. We did and the rest is history. I went to return to my OB/midwife who delivered my other two children and the midwife had since left. I continued care there but was not overly thrilled with the office and OB. I decided to go to Stony Brook “Meet the Midwives” and loved them but was not keen on the idea of 12 different midwives and getting whoever was on call the night of delivery. I wanted someone that knew me and someone I felt absolutely comfortable with. I toured with one particular midwife from the SB midwives at the “Meet the midwife” and had an extensive conversation with her and she told me I would be an excellent candidate for a homebirth and I should consider exploring that. I decided to interview a homebirth midwife and DH and I asked her a million questions and fell in love with her and her student midwife. We ultimately decided to switch our care to her at 20 weeks.
We really didn’t tell too many people we were having a homebirth. I had to break it to my mother carefully and we didn’t tell DH’s parents until about 36 weeks. We didn’t want the negativity and the comments as many people we told were full of negative opinions and ridiculous comments! My main reason for wanting the homebirth was because I didn’t want to go to the hospital and leave DS and DD1 as well as wanting to birth my way and without any intervention. Of course, if the baby or myself were in distress we would transfer immediately.
We chose to keep the gender of this baby a surprise. We had one of each and it didn’t matter if boy or girl. We hired a doula and rented a birth tub and prepared the kids for their impending sibling. I did do some half-assed hypnobabies tracks. I would listen at night before bed and would usually fall asleep pretty quickly. Around 37 weeks there were some concerns with the size of the baby. The midwife felt she was small based on how she felt her with her hands around my belly. She sent us to Madonna Perinatal for some growth scans and NST monitoring. Come to find out the fluid was on the lower side and baby was measuring small but after meeting with the high risk OB there, he agreed to let me proceed with the homebirth but I had to come in twice a week for monitoring and if the fluid dropped any lower or if baby did not continue to grow we would induce. Interestingly, this same thing happened with DD1, so I had inkling this would be a girl.
We monitored for the next few weeks and all was well. Fluid remained at the same level and baby looked great on monitors. My Due date was 6/30 but I had 6/23 in my head the entire pregnancy. 6/23 came and I went to work and all was well. That evening I had some contractions. They were pretty consistent from 7pm-2am. I put the midwife and doula on alert but the contractions never picked up. I must have fallen asleep and woke up in the am and was so confused but also baffled. This has never happened with my other two. Needless to say, I did not return to work that day. I continued to lose my plug Wednesday and Thursday and the midwife came Thursday to check me and I was 3cm and soft and very frustrated because I wanted this baby here and was so filled with anxiety and anticipation. Countless times I told DH I wanted to deliver at the hospital and that the homebirth was out the window. Midwife and student midwife left and told me see you in a day or see you in a week because we didn’t know when baby would make his/her appearance.
That evening we went to visit DH’s parent. We hung out for a while. I had a few contractions there but nothing crazy. We left and went home and put the kids to bed. I went to bed and woke up around midnight to more contractions. DH was sleeping in DD1 room so I managed them while lying in bed. I listened to my hypnobabies tracks all night during the contractions just to keep calm and help manage the pain. Around 6:00am I text DH and told him that I had been contracting all night and he asked if he should go to work. I told him, “no!” He came in to check on me and I immediately kicked him out. Ha! I wanted to be left alone. I text the doula and midwife and let them know what was going on. The doula suggested I take a shower to see if this the real deal or more precipitous labor. I was also a little unsure because of what happened a few nights prior. Once I got in the shower the contractions got much more intense and I had to vocalize through them. I text the doula and midwife from the shower and told them to come ASAP. That was probably around 7:30am. I got out of the shower and sat on the birth ball in the bathroom and read my birth affirmations and continued to labor on the ball. The birth affirmations were huge in helping me focus and concentrate on my task at hand. I asked DH to start filling the birth tub. The doula got to the house around 8:15am and the midwife and her student midwife at 8:30am. My mom arrived at some point as well. My kids woke up and were a little thrown off because my bedroom door was closed and they wanted to see me. I really didn’t want them to see me in such pain so they thankfully came in between contractions gave me a kiss and hug and we told them the baby was coming soon. They went downstairs and my sister came over and took them out front to ride their bikes. The doula was an incredible support during the contractions and even though this was my third birth, it was important for me to hear that this was ok and to help me get through them one at a time and to focus on the end game. The contractions were getting very intense and I was feeling so much pressure to push and I asked to get in the tub. The midwife and doula ripped off my pants , and in I went. I had my mother in front of me and my doula next to her. DH was with the midwife behind me. My water still hadn’t broken. I pushed once and the head came out. The midwife actually jumped into the tub with me to get a good angle to catch baby when born (God Bless this lady!) She was soaked. There was some time before the next contraction. I was there is the tub in awe that this was happening but at the same time I wanted it over. The doula tried to encourage me to reach down to touch my baby’s head but I was not interested in that. I wanted baby out. The next contraction came and baby was born in the water at home at 9:14am! Immediately baby was put up to my chest. I still did not know gender. Baby was a little purple from lack of oxygen because she was so wrapped in her cord (like her sister was) and midwife gave her some O2 from a portable tank and she immediately pinked up. I thought she was a boy through the whole pregnancy until the end when we had similar size and fluid concerns like her sister. I had felt cord and thought boy and couldn’t believe it was a girl when we looked! We opened the window and called down to my sister and DS and DD1 and told them to come up. The kids came upstairs and met their baby sister. I stayed in the tub for a little while and then came out and got onto the bed where we nursed and hung out. I probably birthed the placenta an hour after she was born and then we cut the cord at that point too because it had stopped pulsing and she was ready to be detached. We then snuggled in bed as a new family of 5. We did not use a clamp on her stump. The midwife tied it off with sterile string for that purpose. I took a quick shower while DH snuggled baby Nora. It was an absolutely amazing experience. I would not have changed it for the world. Having had two unmediated births, I have to say while the second was quicker it was way more intense and “painful” because I was not prepared to do this without medication. I had prepared the entire pregnancy to have this child with no drugs and once we switch to a homebirth that was obviously not an option. It was absolutely more manageable being prepared. Working with the homebirth midwife was amazing. They were like a part of our family. All of my prenatal care was done at home, in my living room or bedroom. I only had to go elsewhere for sonograms. She did everything else here including blood work, strep B and all other labs. My children were so comfortable with them and it was absolutely amazing! Nora didn’t have a name for almost a week. We were torn between two names and finally decided on Nora Rose. She was born in the light, in the water, right in front of our bedroom window on 6/26/15 which was a sunny morning at 9:14am weighing 6lb 3oz.
Message edited 6/2/2016 5:33:53 PM.