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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
I need to speak to other parents thay may have had this situation.. My daughter has been very defiant in school this year.. Ok she is 3 but its nursery school and the teachers are forever teling me she is defiant.. I know she is way to young to be evaluated.. She is definitely very independant and stubborn.. She is also the best sharer and sweetest kid most of the time... This is only at school.. She has her moments aat home but its not very often.. she iis very very smart for her age as well..
So today she bit 2 different girls.. She doesnt have any siblings and she speaks beyond her years so she is not frustrated..
I asked her why and she said she just wanted to..
Before I sent her to school she didnt eat breakfast and she was tired. because she went t bed 2 hrs after she usually does.. I knew she was going to have a problem before I even sent her.. But I never expected this..
Now she has been bit herself in school many times and she also has bitten before.. I am so upset and I am so embarassed..
I didnt yell at her today becasue I dont even know what to say to her.. I just brought her home and told her to stay on her couch and think about what she did.. I dont want this to happen ever again. If you have had any experience please and have been successful . I need your advice .. i am so upset..
Should I call the parents? When she has been bit I have never received a call from any of the parents.. But I dont even know what to say to them.. Im sorry Viviana bit your daughters? and she also told me one of the girls bit her too before.. which I have not heard about .. cant tell if she is lying or not.. God please help me ..
I hope this isnt a bad beginning of a bad kid in school.
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Posted 4/9/13 2:34 PM  |
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rkl1130
LIF Adult
Member since 10/07 1476 total posts
Name:
Rose Ann
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Re: My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
Oh no I'm so sorry!
DD was not only bitten in school but she has also been the biter - one time she bit two kids before 11 in the morning!
First off, the school usually tells the parents when a child is bitten. I know where DD goes, they fill out a report and they tell the parents of the child what happened and what they did to treat it. In addition, we were called up.
I would speak to her teachers and see what is going on. You can work with them to stop the biting. The thing with biting sometimes is that one kids starts and other kids do it too. DD talked early and communicates, but she started biting once another kid in class started doing it. She did it out of frustration and if she got mad at another kid. It took the teacher really observing her and us sitting down and really talking to her to figure it out.
When DD was biting, we spoke to her EVERY DAY several times a day about it. Before going in, we went through a whole thing about what she is not supposed to do and that if she did it she would make mommy and daddy upset. When she got home, I would question her and ask her again what she's not supposed to do. Before bed, again, we would repeat the whole not biting thing. For us, DD gets upset when you tell her that we're upset so we used that to teach her a lesson.
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| Posted 4/9/13 2:45 PM |
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Jacksmommy
My love muffin!
Member since 1/07 5819 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
My son was a huge biter, but this happened between about 18-21 months. However, at 3 this shouldn't be an issue. Especially if she has good communication skills. I would absolutely get her evaluated as there may be some other underlying issues. You said she is a great sharer, but at home, she is an only child so she doesn't have to share.
As for disciplining your child, having her sit on a couch and "think" about what she did, probably is not going to change the behavior. I personally would remove something from my child - a favorite toy, etc. and then I would create a behavior chart that if she has good behavior in school (i.e. no biting hitting etc), she can earn that favorite toy back.
I also probably wouldn't call the parents. If your child was bit, your school should have notified you. However, the other child may have bit back as a reaction. I would ask your daughter where she bit her and see if there are any bite marks.
I would also speak with the teacher to see what is going on in the class and what are the consequences for her behavior in school. A lot of schools do not discipline properly. I would also demand an assessment be done of who, what, when, and why your child is biting. This may be helpful if you get a psychologist to evaluate your child.
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| Posted 4/9/13 7:54 PM |
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PregowithTwins
My boys turned 8
Member since 5/11 2451 total posts
Name:
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My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
I also agree with jacksmommy to have her evaluated. My friends son was having issues at school at this age (but not biting) SHe was always being told about it. Now that the child is 5 & in kindergarten was just diagnosed with ADHD. I am not saying your DC has this...but def talk to your Dr.
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| Posted 4/9/13 8:47 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
Posted by Jacksmommy
My son was a huge biter, but this happened between about 18-21 months. However, at 3 this shouldn't be an issue. Especially if she has good communication skills. I would absolutely get her evaluated as there may be some other underlying issues. You said she is a great sharer, but at home, she is an only child so she doesn't have to share.
As for disciplining your child, having her sit on a couch and "think" about what she did, probably is not going to change the behavior. I personally would remove something from my child - a favorite toy, etc. and then I would create a behavior chart that if she has good behavior in school (i.e. no biting hitting etc), she can earn that favorite toy back.
I also probably wouldn't call the parents. If your child was bit, your school should have notified you. However, the other child may have bit back as a reaction. I would ask your daughter where she bit her and see if there are any bite marks.
I would also speak with the teacher to see what is going on in the class and what are the consequences for her behavior in school. A lot of schools do not discipline properly. I would also demand an assessment be done of who, what, when, and why your child is biting. This may be helpful if you get a psychologist to evaluate your child.
What I did take away from her was bike and her playing in her playground right after school... I agree with that.. I told her to stay on the couch and think about what she didi ONLY because I needed to think about what to do .. I was flipping out inside and I didnt want to say or do the wrong thing.. KWIM? I wanted to react immediately and yell at her but I KNEW that would have been a huge mistake.. So the only thing I could think of was that.. But she was begging to play with her bike and go to the play ground. the whole way to the car from the school.. She does share with other children unless a child grabs another toy out of her arms thats normal for her to get upset.....and never gets agressive ever at a playdate or in a park.. it just seem like its happening in this class... I do not have issues at home that I would not consider normal.. This to me is not normal.. She bit out of nowhere 2x in one day.. and pinched someone else on the arm.. ??? I am waiting for a call back from a child psycologist ..
I called both parents and they really were so wonderful.. I did cry but I am so upset about this i couldnt hold back my tears..
So you think I shoud look at the bite on the other children? it was one on the back and one on the shoulder.. and the teachers are saying unprovoked out of nowhere.. I cant even believe this.. Its the first time ever she did this.. I know I have been told she has fought over a toy and pushed but thats all normal.. She has been pushed and bitten too.. but usually over a toy or a seat..
I can see that .. this was just a bite from behind? Thats what I am being told...
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| Posted 4/9/13 9:01 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
Posted by PregowithTwins
I also agree with jacksmommy to have her evaluated. My friends son was having issues at school at this age (but not biting) SHe was always being told about it. Now that the child is 5 & in kindergarten was just diagnosed with ADHD. I am not saying your DC has this...but def talk to your Dr.
They will not diagnose a child until they are 5 .. I dont know what to say about being evaluated? How can they this early? i dont know if they do it ?
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| Posted 4/9/13 9:04 PM |
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Jacksmommy
My love muffin!
Member since 1/07 5819 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
Posted by Diana712
Posted by PregowithTwins
I also agree with jacksmommy to have her evaluated. My friends son was having issues at school at this age (but not biting) SHe was always being told about it. Now that the child is 5 & in kindergarten was just diagnosed with ADHD. I am not saying your DC has this...but def talk to your Dr.
They will not diagnose a child until they are 5 .. I dont know what to say about being evaluated? How can they this early? i dont know if they do it ?
They can diagnos a child before age 5 but before age 5 it doesn't matter what she would have anyways- it would be considered as a preschooler with a disability. However in the mean time maybe she needs a functional behavior assessment or a Seit in the school. However if it is ONLy this school maybe you need to consider switching her out. It may not be the best placement for her. At that age when my son was biting we switched schools and he never bitt again. We feel that something was going on in that school that he couldn't communicate.
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| Posted 4/9/13 9:11 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: My daughter bit AGAIN in school.
Posted by Jacksmommy
Posted by Diana712
Posted by PregowithTwins
I also agree with jacksmommy to have her evaluated. My friends son was having issues at school at this age (but not biting) SHe was always being told about it. Now that the child is 5 & in kindergarten was just diagnosed with ADHD. I am not saying your DC has this...but def talk to your Dr.
They will not diagnose a child until they are 5 .. I dont know what to say about being evaluated? How can they this early? i dont know if they do it ?
They can diagnos a child before age 5 but before age 5 it doesn't matter what she would have anyways- it would be considered as a preschooler with a disability. However in the mean time maybe she needs a functional behavior assessment or a Seit in the school. However if it is ONLy this school maybe you need to consider switching her out. It may not be the best placement for her. At that age when my son was biting we switched schools and he never bitt again. We feel that something was going on in that school that he couldn't communicate.
Really?? I didnt know that.. I am definitely going to look into that functional behavior assesment.. I sware this is the only time she ever bit anyone!! in this school in this class room.. the director did say to the mother of the bitten child that they aare going to put a shadow in the class room to watch my dd.  I cant even believe this is happening.. I dont know anything about adhd but it sounds so harsh to me and hard to handle .. I dont want to switch her out at the end of the year .. its almost over but I want to correct this now!!!
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| Posted 4/9/13 9:17 PM |
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