marriage counceling

I am a regular poster here and am having some issues with DH. He suggested today to see someone about it. I was just wondering how many of you have seen a councler?

TIA!

Re: marriage counceling

DH and I went to counseling together BEFORE we got married...to iron out some issues from our pasts and clear up some issues that we had together. We continued to go alittle while after we were married, but we have not gone in probably almost 1 1/2 years.
It definately helped us, and if needed, I wouldn't think twice about going back!!

Good luck!

Re: marriage counceling

While DH and I never need to, if your DH feels the need to go, I think you should. Instead of keeping to yourselves and making the issues even worse, it would be much better for the both of you to get things out in the open and resolve your issues. Having somebody to mediate and help you open up to eachother makes things a million times easier. If you value your marriage (which I'm sure you do), I'm sure you're willing to do anything to make it better, so I say go for it. I'm sure it will help.

Re: marriage counceling

We did precana prior to the wedding with our priest with just us and him and it was great! Luckily we were able to work out ALOT prior to getting married so we have been very lucky.

Re: marriage counceling

DH and I don't need counseling now, but I would definitely do it if we need to.

Re: marriage counceling

I saw one on my own after my first marraige failed. If/When DH and I ever need one, I wouldn't hesitate to go. There's too much at stake...

Re: marriage counceling

THANK YOU all for your responses and honest answers. I am very willing to go, but was just upset to think that we need one. We do love eachother very much and that's why we want to go. We have to learn how to fight with one another. He doesn't understand what I need/am saying during a dissagreement and then when he responds I mistake it and the whole fight escalates so much that it ends up with me crying for days. We have never been abusive to one another physically or emotionally. We just don't get the other's message.

Please keep your responses coming. This has been theraputic for me today.

For those who went to a councelor- what can I expect for the first meeting? My friend is giving her councelor's name and number. As soon as I get that info I'm going to call.

Re: marriage counceling

Posted by many-questions

THANK YOU all for your responses and honest answers. I am very willing to go, but was just upset to think that we need one. We do love eachother very much and that's why we want to go. We have to learn how to fight with one another. He doesn't understand what I need/am saying during a dissagreement and then when he responds I mistake it and the whole fight escalates so much that it ends up with me crying for days. We have never been abusive to one another physically or emotionally. We just don't get the other's message.

Please keep your responses coming. This has been theraputic for me today.

For those who went to a councelor- what can I expect for the first meeting? My friend is giving her councelor's name and number. As soon as I get that info I'm going to call.

Re: marriage counceling

I went to counceling for PPD/PTSD after Molly was born. Scott went with me a few times. It was not marriage counceling but it was very helpful to me and to both of us. It was SOOO hard for me to tell Scott that I really needed professional help. He knew I did, but to admit it for myself was very hard. I am not someone who admits needing help very easily. There was a point where I felt Scott was not "my rock" when I needed him to be and thru the therapist he and I were able to both see what happened and move on. It stenghened us.

Re: marriage counseling

I definitely suggest going either with or without your DH.

Message edited 5/17/2006 2:47:04 PM.

Re: marriage counceling

Message edited 2/8/2007 12:20:48 PM.

Re: marriage counceling

Re: marriage counceling

My parents went to marriage counseling when I was younger, and they stayed in counseling until my dad died. It always helped their relationship, even when their "problems" were fixed and went away. My parents had an amazing marriage, and I think a big part of that was the counselilng they went through. It can only help to get your feelings out into the open with a neutral third party to mediate.

Re: marriage counceling

DH and I went after we got married and it was one of the best things we did. I honestly do not believe that it means your marriage is in trouble, but the opposite- that you both care enough to give it the best chance.

Good luck!

Re: marriage counceling

My 2 friends are going through this. One of them her DH is going willingly and the other has to fight with him to go. He still hasn't gone with her but she goes on her own. I can say it is helping both of them- obviously the one who's DH is going is working better.

Good luck!

Re: marriage counceling

DH and I are currently in counseling. I think it's been very helpful. I had suggested it a few months ago when things were unbearable and he wouldn't go. It wasn't until he was on the same page with me that we started sessions.

We go as a couple and have occasional individual sessions and I am very thankful we're going.