IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

My RE wants us to try one more injectable/IUI cycle and then move on to IVF. I have no issues with IVF and am ready to move forward if the next cycle is unsuccessful.

However, DH is not on board. He has serious issues with the fact that we will potentially have unused embryos that may need to be discarded in the future.

While he understands that this may never be an issue (we may not have any left) and that we can store them for as long as we want, he does not know if he can go through with IVF knowing that we may need to destroy them at some point.

Did anyone or their DH have these issues? If so, what did you decide to do?

Message edited 1/5/2009 9:29:41 AM.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

My DH was hesitant to move forward with IVF, but for other reasons.

There is an option to donate your remaining embryos - is that something he would be more comfortable with?

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

DH had no issues, it is our only option.

As far as unused embryos, it is a chance, there is also the chance you end up with none that are unused.

You can elect to freeze them and make a decision later as to what to do.

Good luck with your decision.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

You can also donate them to research, donate them to another infertile couple, or just dispose of them.

DH and I chose to donate (in the future if we have any left after we are done having kids). They told us to be prepared that 20 years after the donation you could have a kid knocking on your door because your the biological parents...

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

I'm sorry I dont have anything to add - I wish I did.
But I just wanted to wish you well

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

FM

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

Posted by JennyPenny

You can also donate them to research, donate them to another infertile couple, or just dispose of them.

DH and I chose to donate (in the future if we have any left after we are done having kids). They told us to be prepared that 20 years after the donation you could have a kid knocking on your door because your the biological parents...

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

We were given the options of

A) disposing
B) donating to another couple (which we actually can't do because since everything with the IVF went so quickly, we didn't have time to go to an "approved" lab for some of the blood tests we had done - so they won't allow us to do that)
C) donating to research
D) donating to "quality assurance" at our lab

- As of right now, we have 10 frozen embryos and are planning on using 2 or 3 for our FET.

We want to have 3 kids total, so I don't see us as having any embryos left at all.. but if we do - then I honestly don't know what we will do. I guess we will decide that if the time comes.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

Don't have any advice but just wanted to send some hugs and wish you well...I am sure you guys will come to a decision together.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

We were given the option to
donate to research
donate to a couple
discard

We didn't want to discard, and the idea of donating to a couple sounded good.

The social worker said if we went this way, she'd need the names/addresses/phone #'s of immediate family, in case, down the road a child/children wants to find their biological family.

We chose to donate to research.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

Should we have any left over, DH and I plan to donate them to research.

I feel almost guilty not donating them to another couple, but DH isn't comfortable with that and it has to be something we both want to do.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

I have trouble with the same issue as DH prior to my IVF I contacted an organization and the are willing to set up a donation when the time comes. Another option that your RE will not be happy with is to only stimulate you to produce the eggs you will use in one cycle. Which is very very difficult but not impossible.

We all want to become parents but we shouldn't be asked to compromise our beliefs in the process. Just because it's not easy and the road may be more bumpy doesn't mean it can't be done

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

Thanks so much for everyone's responses - I really appreciate it

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

If we had any leftover (highly unlikely) we would donate to research.

Re: IVF and Issues with Unused Embryos

Well, I just had this talk again with DH. We really WILL NOT have to make this decision based on my genetic issues, but if we were to, DH said the thing he'd feel most comfortable with, although still not comfortable, is to discard. Personally, I would pay to keep them frozen forever in order to NOT have to make that decision.